Do you avoid the bathroom if there is a transwoman?

[PeachyDaisy]

I’m going to an industry event next week and I know there will be a transwoman attending. Should I use the disabled bathroom to avoid an awkward encounter or just continue to use the women’s and hope not to run into them?

Do you have something against this person in particular or a reason to be wary of them?

I’m GC but most people are just trying to live their lives.

If you are feeling uncomfortable I guess you could. They might well be doing the same anyway. Being honest I wouldn't have even given this a second thought- what are you worried might happen if you did happen to be using the bathroom at the same time?

@ChipsyKing and @PurpleNightingale It's not ok for a man to be using the female toilets in the first place. Women have the right to dignity and privacy away from males as well as the right to safety.

On this board we acknowledge that, as well as women's very reasonable concerns over what might happen if they end up in a situation like this and how they would navigate it with regards to their career. Women have been sacked for speaking up about males in female only spaces.

@PeachyDaisy What is your industry culture like? Are they supportive of sex based rights or are they captured by gender ideology?

I’m not sure what the industry culture is like, the issue is not spoken about at my company. I live in Australia.

Yes I do. There's a TW in a group I attend who uses the women's toilets. I don't use them if they are in there. I wait until they've come out.

That’s hard, as you are not able to challenge as we are legally in the U.K.
Can you make sure you use the loos when there is another woman there - safety in numbers etc.

No

They may use the disabled toilet. Some do.

I don’t like using unisex loos because men make such a mess but apart from that it doesn’t bother me. Most trans people are just that really and not weird perverts. You will always get the odd wrongun but they are few and far between.

Can’t believe you care so much about this that you are posting a thread about a potential trip for a wee a week in advance 🤣
I don’t believe TW belong in women’s spaces either but seriously, what do you think is going to happen?! He’s just trying to live his life, fine if you don’t agree with it, but you’re massively overreacting about this

How do people know this? The ever confident…. “Oh but they’re just trying to live their life”…

FGS. “Safety in numbers”. He’s using the toilet at a work event, what do you think he’s planning on doing in there? Hiding behind the cubicle door waiting to pounce on every unsuspecting woman that comes in?! 🤣

She isn’t really. In Australia she has no right to even suggest that the TW uses a different spaces because TWAW.

that would other me too. But as others have said I wouldn’t not use women’s spaces but would avoid hangar the same time obviously.

Wasn’t it Australia that had the advert where women showing distress at being in a lift with a man dressed as a woman were branded as the ones causing offence and upset?

We have no idea about whether the man at the event is a ‘just want to pee’ person or a ‘comedy fake breasts and mini skirt and fish nets and filming himself having a wank’ person.

Either way, if you don’t want to be in a toilet with them, or anyone else, then you don’t need anyone else’s permission or approval not to be.

they have a pair of bollox, OP might not want to share a bathroom with a man.

'On this board we acknowledge that'.... this is an open forum people can post what they like and no one owns this board so a little less of the enforced echo chamber please!

I do find it difficult. It's happened once and I tiptoed out and waited for the person to leave, then went in. It's just me, not them, I am just funny like that

Not at all. I’ve never felt in the slightest bit threatened by a trans woman.

We know what disgusting things men do in women’s toilets, from their endless boasting about it on other online forums.

Men commit most violence and nearly all sexual assaults against women. Trans-identifying men are more, not less, likely to commit sexual offences than other men. They have no harmless reason to use women’s facilities.
If they’re scared of other men the same size as them, why don’t they respect our justified fear of male intruders, who are statistically likely to be stronger and more violent than us?

Like many other women, I have been sexually assaulted by male strangers and I am deeply stressed when a man breaks boundaries to intrude into an enclosed space that’s meant to be for women only.

So although I would not use disabled toilets for any other reason, as that’s unfair to people with disabilities, I would in order to avoid a man.

If you are uncomfortable just leave and wait for them to leave or ignore them. I am also in a country where I can't ask them to leave so work around them.

I wouldn’t use the disabled toilet but I would be extremely uncomfortable using the ladies loos if a man was in there. Yes, TW are men. I would wait for them not to be in there. Unfortunately, creeps seem to latch on to me.

He can live his life going to the male toilet then can’t he? Where he belongs. Women are also attempting to live their lives, in anyway that makes them feel comfortable. It’s not a woman’s duty to enable a man to live his life in a way that increases his comfort, while diminishing their own.

Unless you are disabled you should not use the disabled bathroom.

assuming you mean a man who chooses to present as female, and given your location, I personally would just not go to the bathroom when he is in there and I would wait. In your circumstances.

thankfully im disabled so I use the disabled bathroom.

i can’t get worked up about a potential tw in a toilet at an event, quite different to the issue of showers in leisure centres or female only wards in hospitals. Mountains and molehills spring to mind. The disabled toilet is unisex so I do not understand how this is better - you know this person it’s not a safety concern, do not inconvenience disabled people

Can you tell us why women should have to tolerate men in their single sex private spaces?
A man who is claiming to be a woman and invades women’s spaces is already overstepping unwritten boundaries by his mere presence and yet women are just supposed to put up with it and be kind to the poor marginalised bloke. Why should we be the ones to be tolerant and kind? What about those men being tolerant and kind towards women who want privacy, dignity and safety away from males? Don’t we count? Don’t our feelings matter?