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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

Bluestocking Women's Pub - cheapest bar on the internet.

1000 replies

EdithStourton · 22/04/2026 19:55

The thread in which Gosie's mysterious adventures will continue. All women welcome to join us for a virtual tipple, fun, support and arcane knowledge. And tractors.

Bluestocking Women's Pub - cheapest bar on the internet.
OP posts:
Thread gallery
156
ifIwerenotanandroid · 26/04/2026 14:05

Oh, thank you @MyrtleLion ! I love it, including the image. Timey-wimey, mmmm...

ifIwerenotanandroid · 26/04/2026 14:08

Oh dear, Marie! I was going to suggest that you must be a fallen angel now, but having googled it, that's SO not you. Hope you really haven't sustained any injuries.

Chersfrozenface · 26/04/2026 14:15

Hello, all.

I've been busy, so not been around much. One of the things I've been busy with is our Mediterranean courtyard garden, ahem.

When I saw some suffragette coloured pansies, obviously I had to buy one.

Bluestocking Women's Pub - cheapest bar on the internet.
EdithStourton · 26/04/2026 14:36

Magpiecomplex · 26/04/2026 10:16

It's a hand cultivator. Although I prefer your description!

I think that's what we in East Anglia call a crome.

OP posts:
MarieDeGournay · 26/04/2026 15:02

EdithStourton · 26/04/2026 14:36

I think that's what we in East Anglia call a crome.

I tried to look up 'crome' on Bing but it kept putting in a 'h'😡
Google was better, it always is, and came up with
crome noun ˈkrōm
plural-s
now dialectal, England
: hook
also : a long stick with a hook at the end

When I did an image search, I found that it is a 'long handled cultivator'.
Well, was...

I'm OK thanks Android, a few minor aches and pains are developing after the fall ['postlapsarian'Smile]but* *I was leaning backwards and so fell backwards -

if I'd fallen forwards there would have been a lot of things that could have impacted my face😧
sometimes it's best not to think of how badly things might have turned out!

lcakethereforeIam · 26/04/2026 15:04

MyrtleLion · 26/04/2026 13:21

This next one is different. Not a country house, not a polite conversation over claret.

@ifIwerenotanandroid's lab is… precise. Controlled chaos, but the kind that’s been calibrated.

Gosie arrives without announcement, as usual. She’s expected anyway.

Android has the painting set up under proper light. Not hung. Never hung. On a stand, slightly angled, surrounded by equipment that definitely didn’t come from any heritage catalogue.

Here’s the situation.

The painting looks right. Period composition, correct pigments at first pass, even the ageing behaves itself. But something about it is… too coherent. Too internally consistent, like it knows what it’s supposed to be.

Android explains, briefly:

  • it came out of the attic during a clear-out
  • no documentation worth trusting
  • but under scan, there are anomalies
  • layers that don’t behave chronologically

Possibility one:
It’s an AI-generated pastiche, but executed physically. Not printed. Painted. Which would be… ambitious.

Possibility two:
It’s genuine, but has been interfered with later—altered to align with expectations.

Possibility three, which Android does not say out loud but absolutely means:
It doesn’t belong to its own time at all.

Gosie doesn’t react to any of that. She just looks.

No magnifying glass this time. She doesn’t need it. She shifts slightly to catch the light across the surface. Watches how it breaks. That tells her more than any scan.

Then she does three things:

  • checks the underdrawing alignment against the visible composition
  • runs a fingertip just near the surface, not touching, feeling for micro-variation in varnish
  • steps back much further than you’d expect

And then—there it is.

A hesitation.

Not in Gosie. In the painting.

A line that was laid down as if the artist already knew the correction they were going to make. That’s not how real process works. Real work discovers itself. This one… anticipates itself.

She turns to Android.

“It’s not a fake,” she says. “But it’s not honest either.”

What it is, more likely:
A work produced with knowledge it shouldn’t have had at the time. Either informed by something future-facing… or reconstructed with access to data no human painter of that period could have held in their head.

Android’s time machine theory stops being a joke at that point.

So what happens next?

Gosie doesn’t authenticate it. She doesn’t dismiss it.

She classifies it.

Not for the market. For themselves.

This piece doesn’t go into circulation. It doesn’t get published. It doesn’t get “discovered.”

It gets contained. Hung in the Bluestocking if Android can bear to.part with it.

Because if it is what it might be, the last thing you do is let the wider world start asking how a painting can appear to remember decisions before they’re made.

Gosie agrees to stay a while.

Not to solve it.

To watch it.

Which, for her, is the same thing.

I think I recognise that painting! Is it the Faintly Sceptical Cavalier?

ErrolTheDragon · 26/04/2026 15:23

lcakethereforeIam · 26/04/2026 15:04

I think I recognise that painting! Is it the Faintly Sceptical Cavalier?

I was thinking The Unamused Cavalier.

ErrolTheDragon · 26/04/2026 15:27

Chersfrozenface · 26/04/2026 14:15

Hello, all.

I've been busy, so not been around much. One of the things I've been busy with is our Mediterranean courtyard garden, ahem.

When I saw some suffragette coloured pansies, obviously I had to buy one.

Pedantically, petunias Grin. Come to think my pansies (which are still centre stage in my patio pots as I have to remind myself at this time of year that there is still danger of frosts for another month) are suffragettes too - purples and whites with the leaves providing the requisite green.

EdithStourton · 26/04/2026 15:29

now dialectal, England

I think of myself educated and middle-class and every few years I discover that a word or phrase that I either use myself or hear unquestioningly is apparently the preserve of clod-hopping yokels.

Crome was today's discovery: I thought, I think Marie's got a crome but perhaps I should double check, it's a while since I used one... ooh, look, that's a hand cultivator in proper English.

OP posts:
Chickadeeinme · 26/04/2026 15:36

I constantly get reminded I’m using Britishisms over here. Chuffed, bollocks, daft, brilliant - not even known Britishisms like boot, shop, bonnet (car), windscreen…

Chersfrozenface · 26/04/2026 15:42

ErrolTheDragon · 26/04/2026 15:27

Pedantically, petunias Grin. Come to think my pansies (which are still centre stage in my patio pots as I have to remind myself at this time of year that there is still danger of frosts for another month) are suffragettes too - purples and whites with the leaves providing the requisite green.

Quite right, petunias. Starts with the letter p, I'm trying to keep too many things in my head at once, you know how it is.

Though you'd think I'd remember after discussing with the woman in the shop how to keep the bastarding slugs and snails off the petunias.

ErrolTheDragon · 26/04/2026 15:46

It’s often not obvious when you’re using a ‘Britishism’. Way back, when the software originally developed by my English academic boss was being commercialised by the US company who’d bought the rights (and hired me), our American colleagues were genuinely baffled by our description of a calculation which was performed on request rather than being continuously updated being a ‘one-off calculation’. It was quite hard to convey the same thing concisely in different terms.

ErrolTheDragon · 26/04/2026 15:47

Chersfrozenface · 26/04/2026 15:42

Quite right, petunias. Starts with the letter p, I'm trying to keep too many things in my head at once, you know how it is.

Though you'd think I'd remember after discussing with the woman in the shop how to keep the bastarding slugs and snails off the petunias.

That and the label😁

MarieDeGournay · 26/04/2026 15:48

Chersfrozenface · 26/04/2026 15:42

Quite right, petunias. Starts with the letter p, I'm trying to keep too many things in my head at once, you know how it is.

Though you'd think I'd remember after discussing with the woman in the shop how to keep the bastarding slugs and snails off the petunias.

'The Pedantic Petunia' would be an interesting name for a pub, wouldn't it?
Half way between the British Library and your local garden centre😄

ifIwerenotanandroid · 26/04/2026 16:02

MarieDeGournay · 26/04/2026 15:48

'The Pedantic Petunia' would be an interesting name for a pub, wouldn't it?
Half way between the British Library and your local garden centre😄

MISS LAVISH. I prefer something wilder, bolder. - the reckless rose, the tempestuous tulip.

WearyAuldWumman · 26/04/2026 16:26

I tried the Body Balance class in my former hometown this morning. It's supposed to be a mixture of Pilates, Yoga and Tai Chi.

I have a vague recollection of being told to get into the 'Downward Dog' position and then having to move one leg one way, 'tother leg another way and an arm somewhere else.

For one awful moment, I thought that the only thing that would stop my face from smashing into the mat would be be my wonky Scottish Slavic nose. [Think "Patrick Stewart's nose" but with a propensity to wiggle in the middle when I laugh - courtesy of an iron door handle when I was about 7.]

SionnachRuadh · 26/04/2026 16:33

The dialect thing is a bugger. I frequently use Norn Ironisms without thinking - like I'll mention I've got a skelf in my finger - and only notice when English friends and colleagues look at me in bemusement.

I have a kind of love-hate relationship with Philip Roth, but I sometimes think of a great passage in Portnoy's Complaint when Alex Portnoy (and I assume this is Roth being autobiographical) talks about how he always got perfect scores in school vocab tests, until the teacher showed him a picture of a spatula.

Obviously he knew what a spatula was, and he knew it was called a spatula, but he didn't know what it was in English - he associated it with his mother, and automatically assumed spatula was a Yiddish word.

WearyAuldWumman · 26/04/2026 16:50

When I was a bairn in Fife, we'd get a skelf rather than a splinter. I think that the dialect is dying out now, unfortunately.

My favourite Fife place name is Puddledub. The word 'dub' means 'puddle'. Puddledub...so good they named it twice. Sort of.

SionnachRuadh · 26/04/2026 16:53

Also, when we lose the old words we lose a whole vocabulary of insults.

I can remember, when I was a wean, my parents would call me a glipe, a skitter, and a cheeky ghost, sometimes in the same sentence.

lcakethereforeIam · 26/04/2026 16:54

A hand cultivator could be a manicurist.

I've just finished reading The Silkworm. Through the book I kept annoying myself by getting annoyed at Bombyx Mori. It should be Bombyx mori, irritated me kept thinking. 'No!', countered, other me, 'it's being used as a proper noun'. First me would settle down grumbling until the next occurrence of the name.

I figured out who the killer was (spoilers) because my sister was hospitalised by a leaky acid battery, but without all the disembowling, and i recognised the signs. Although I amused myself by imaging writer dude wasn't actually dead. It was a doppelganger! He'd used the acid to destroy distinguishing features. The transwomen character was treated very kindly considering he'd tried to kill our hero. A bit of a nitwit but that could be chalked up to his youth. Not so much as a misgendering.

MarieDeGournay · 26/04/2026 17:10

WearyAuldWumman · 26/04/2026 16:50

When I was a bairn in Fife, we'd get a skelf rather than a splinter. I think that the dialect is dying out now, unfortunately.

My favourite Fife place name is Puddledub. The word 'dub' means 'puddle'. Puddledub...so good they named it twice. Sort of.

A skelp to us was slap with the open hand, usually applied to a child's lower leg.
Not to us - my parents didn't skelp us at all, but it was a common enough threat in other families, as in 'Do you want a skelp?!' and was occasionally administered.

AngleofRepose · 26/04/2026 17:16

A few years ago, I bought a hand-hoe, which is what I thought you were all talking about. But now I see they also make a hand-cultivator.

Glad I bought the former! Niwaki make really nice tools, but my goodness the price on that cultivator!

Bluestocking Women's Pub - cheapest bar on the internet.
Bluestocking Women's Pub - cheapest bar on the internet.
MarieDeGournay · 26/04/2026 17:16

SionnachRuadh · 26/04/2026 16:53

Also, when we lose the old words we lose a whole vocabulary of insults.

I can remember, when I was a wean, my parents would call me a glipe, a skitter, and a cheeky ghost, sometimes in the same sentence.

My parents used to call us a little faggot!😮
It was a jokey way of saying 'you little so-and-so' - if you played a trick on them or something.
It was faggot as in something worthless as in a bundle of sticks.
Not a meatball or er..... anything else😏

Sionnach, would you have been referred to as 'thran' if you were being cross or 'contrary' as a child?

edited to add Weary to that question as I think it's a Scots word

AngleofRepose · 26/04/2026 17:18

Chickadeeinme · 26/04/2026 15:36

I constantly get reminded I’m using Britishisms over here. Chuffed, bollocks, daft, brilliant - not even known Britishisms like boot, shop, bonnet (car), windscreen…

I still use a lot of Americanisms, so I'm told, but, after such a long time in Britain, I can apparently swear like the best of them here! 😀

Some British words I will not use, some I love and have adopted with glee!

AngleofRepose · 26/04/2026 17:22

One of the first dialectal British words I learned was "cag" (is that how you spell it?) - for a pull in your sweater. My friend was from Shropshire, near the Staffordshire border, if I recall correctly.

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