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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

Am I naive in thinking that in a couple of years, if not sooner, this will all be behind us? A few court cases, people clear about the law, women's rights protected again??

1000 replies

loveyouradvice · 26/05/2025 23:04

And yes the noisy TRA far fewer in number and sidelined as the sad fringe that are left as others move on.....

Or do others think it will pan out differently??

OP posts:
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17
RedToothBrush · 27/05/2025 12:42

AYoungTransWoman · 27/05/2025 09:39

Nobody should be forced to date anyone? Trying to require anyone to date anybody is creepy and predatory.

Some lesbians date trans women, some don't, that's just called consent.

Any woman who is willing to date a transwoman, is by definition, not a lesbian.

Thelnebriati · 27/05/2025 12:43

It won't just go away, it ticks so many boxes. Its adherents are convinced they and only they are in the right. I live in a city where it has hold and I can tell you the way people here think and behave is becoming frightening.
Men can either ignore it as being nothing to do with them, or gleefully use it as an attack on women in general and feminism in particular.
People who haven't really thought much about its impact can use it to virtue signal.

teawamutu · 27/05/2025 12:44

RinklyRomaine · 27/05/2025 12:41

Eh? PP has never claimed feminism
and none of that addresses any point I made at all. Feminism is for women. All the rest of that crap is just that. Crap. You’re still trying to frame women who say no to you as far right. It’s bollocks. The most progressive women I’ve ever known (by which I mean true progressives not this nonsensical cohort of identity twats) know that trans ideology is the most regressive embracing of harmful stereotypes ever. It’s not right wing to know you cannot ever be a woman. And for the love of god, denying you’re a woman is not denying your humanity. Stop pretending people telling you you are male is ‘putting you in the ovens’. Out of interest, got any evidence of that? Because I’ve seen pages and pages of rape and death threats from TRAs towards women and really nothing ever of the sort you’re suggesting you get 4 times a day. And don’t pretend you are protecting our eyes by not sharing. You’d be wearing it on a t shirt if it was real to keep shoring up the Most Marginalised (TM) myth if they existed.

Every word of this.

Ralph Waldo Emerson: "Let me never fall into the vulgar mistake of dreaming that I am persecuted whenever I am contradicted."

FrippEnos · 27/05/2025 12:44

ButterflyHatched · 27/05/2025 12:38

I find the puerile signs and chants inciting violence against anyone to be disgusting and have no interest in thuggish behaviour. I have always been a peaceful, law-abiding person - sometimes to the frustration of others!

I do also acknowledge that there comes a point where it is no longer possible to protect yourself with words alone, and history holds no shortage of examples of those who were unable to stop atrocities or prevent discrimination and marginalisation by asking nicely.

I will continue to ask to be allowed to live in dignity, treated like a full human being, until it either no longer works or there is no cause for it.

We, just this month, commemorated the end of a very significant period of history where asking people nicely not to genocide minorities demonstrably wasn't enough.

There is a tiny minority that would see trans people come to harm.

The vast majority are quite happy for you to live in peace, dignity and be treated like a full human being.

Its just a shame that there are so many trans people that don't seem to feel the same way about other groups and wish to remove their long fought for rights.

And fighting against that isn't transphobia or transphobic it is fighting for their right to live in peace, dignity and be treated like a full human being.

ThatsNotMyTeen · 27/05/2025 12:44

I think it probably will. Once there’s nothing to be gained from assuming a trans identity any more, be that attention, indulging a fetish or whatever, numbers will dwindle.

ThatsNotMyTeen · 27/05/2025 12:46

ThatsNotMyTeen · 27/05/2025 12:44

I think it probably will. Once there’s nothing to be gained from assuming a trans identity any more, be that attention, indulging a fetish or whatever, numbers will dwindle.

For the majority I mean. The few people there have always been with gender dysphora will still exist, but they would seem to be the minority

ButterflyHatched · 27/05/2025 12:47

JasmineAllen · 27/05/2025 12:19

So you are expecting sympathy for receiving the same abuse GC women receive? I agree is not nice people calling for your death/punch in the face/decapitation but at least you're not getting those threats from a bigger, stronger sex than you are like we are.

I've no idea what a neggy lesbian chaser is, but why would they be chasing TW who are men and by definition can't be lesbians? It makes no sense.

It mystifies me as well. For a laugh, I asked an older lesbian couple who have been family friends for years and they said 'ohhh no, this is very familiar. When this happens it's usually because they fancy you and hate you because of it. It's like upside down straight panic! run away!!!'

CompleteGinasaur · 27/05/2025 12:49

ApocalipstickNow · 27/05/2025 12:05

” more conventionally attractive trans women as emotional punchbags.”

😂 stealth brag.

Utterly nonsensical stealth brag. If Dylan Mulvaney or India Willoughby is your ideal of feminine pulchritude your conventions for judging attractiveness are way off.

NameChangedOfc · 27/05/2025 12:50

RinklyRomaine · 27/05/2025 09:14

Yep. My DD and her friends say that’s what turns them off the most. The identity kids literally talk about nothing else, all in hysterical tones of aggression and panic. No other interests, no other friends. The several trans identified girls of my acquaintance are all the same - rejecting life long friends, cousins etc all to hang on this tight little obsessive clan unable to talk about anything but trans lives mattering. Next years GCSE art topics are, of course, identity, cue 4 BLM pieces and 3 TRAHR pink and blue bits. Yawn. At least the rest of the kids are rolling their eyes and have personalities.

Yes, it's all so superficial, intellectually (and morally) lazy and solipsistic that my eyes literally cry from boredom whenever I encounter some of the examples you say.
It's so obviously a façade. Tha discourse is so simplistic and (as the younguns say) cringe!
I'm glad the kids are becoming aware, though!

RedToothBrush · 27/05/2025 12:53

ApocalipstickNow · 27/05/2025 12:05

” more conventionally attractive trans women as emotional punchbags.”

😂 stealth brag.

Is this the classically male way of saying

'my tits are better than your tits'?

Which a woman would never ever say ever.

ButterflyHatched · 27/05/2025 12:54

suggestionsplease1 · 27/05/2025 11:50

If you're questioning what I say about being a female born lesbian feel free to go back to my very first posts years ago, when I was asking for advice about my F-F relationship at the time breaking down.

I was on Mumsnet long before I realised there was a section devoted to transphobia 😊

But yes, in terms of general point there is a very questionable 'transman' doing the rounds at the moment on here isn't there? 😂

I don't want to get into the habit of questioning other people's self-declarations, especially on a site like this which is so dependent upon a culture of honest, frank disclosure. However...

That particular poster does have something of a whiff of the 'I had a haircut once; here is how I escaped the evil trans cult!' detrans grift about them, it has to be said.

RedToothBrush · 27/05/2025 12:57

ButterflyHatched · 27/05/2025 12:54

I don't want to get into the habit of questioning other people's self-declarations, especially on a site like this which is so dependent upon a culture of honest, frank disclosure. However...

That particular poster does have something of a whiff of the 'I had a haircut once; here is how I escaped the evil trans cult!' detrans grift about them, it has to be said.

If you don't want to get into that habit, I think that ship has already sailed.

WithSilverBells · 27/05/2025 12:59

That particular poster does have something of a whiff of the 'I had a haircut once; here is how I escaped the evil trans cult!' detrans grift about them, it has to be said.

Ah the notorious trans community purity spiral. 🙄

LadyBracknellsHandbagg · 27/05/2025 13:03

ButterflyHatched · 27/05/2025 12:38

I find the puerile signs and chants inciting violence against anyone to be disgusting and have no interest in thuggish behaviour. I have always been a peaceful, law-abiding person - sometimes to the frustration of others!

I do also acknowledge that there comes a point where it is no longer possible to protect yourself with words alone, and history holds no shortage of examples of those who were unable to stop atrocities or prevent discrimination and marginalisation by asking nicely.

I will continue to ask to be allowed to live in dignity, treated like a full human being, until it either no longer works or there is no cause for it.

We, just this month, commemorated the end of a very significant period of history where asking people nicely not to genocide minorities demonstrably wasn't enough.

‘We, just this month, commemorated the end of a very significant period of history where asking people nicely not to genocide minorities demonstrably wasn't enough.’

What was this then?

ButterflyHatched · 27/05/2025 13:04

RinklyRomaine · 27/05/2025 12:41

Eh? PP has never claimed feminism
and none of that addresses any point I made at all. Feminism is for women. All the rest of that crap is just that. Crap. You’re still trying to frame women who say no to you as far right. It’s bollocks. The most progressive women I’ve ever known (by which I mean true progressives not this nonsensical cohort of identity twats) know that trans ideology is the most regressive embracing of harmful stereotypes ever. It’s not right wing to know you cannot ever be a woman. And for the love of god, denying you’re a woman is not denying your humanity. Stop pretending people telling you you are male is ‘putting you in the ovens’. Out of interest, got any evidence of that? Because I’ve seen pages and pages of rape and death threats from TRAs towards women and really nothing ever of the sort you’re suggesting you get 4 times a day. And don’t pretend you are protecting our eyes by not sharing. You’d be wearing it on a t shirt if it was real to keep shoring up the Most Marginalised (TM) myth if they existed.

Thankfully Spiked only holds readership amongst a small proportion of people who self-identify in any way with the political left, though those strains of thought are sadly ascendant in the form of Blue Labour's ongoing brutalisation of trans people, picking right up where the Tory culture warriors left off when their party disintegrated around them.

RedBeech · 27/05/2025 13:07

ButterflyHatched · 27/05/2025 01:38

By healthcare needs, do you mean actual healthcare or conversion therapy? I hear the latter is quite a lucrative field when pursued freelance, and a fertile recruitment ground for the next generation of legal figureheads to drive attacks on trans healthcare.

Helping people accept the body they were born with, helping them accept it is okay to be gay or to have any interest you like, any hairstyle or clothing you like and still be the gender you are born as, is NOT conversion therapy. Having body parts chopped off and lifelong drugs is literally an attempt at a conversion that can never be achieved, but can lead to complications.

Transpeople should be treated with respect and have the right to move through life safely. As should we all. But not the right to trample on others' rights or to dictate that everyone sees the world as they do. That's unnervingly controlling and leads to people lying and pretending and censoring their true beliefs.

ButterflyHatched · 27/05/2025 13:07

LadyBracknellsHandbagg · 27/05/2025 13:03

‘We, just this month, commemorated the end of a very significant period of history where asking people nicely not to genocide minorities demonstrably wasn't enough.’

What was this then?

Oh just a small thing - you know, VE day.

Commemorating the close of a years-long ordeal triggered by fascists demonstrating that asking nicely sometimes doesn't work.

It's a little hard to find that message buried amongst all the flags and braying about 'immigrant invaders' though, so I'd forgive you for missing it.

RinklyRomaine · 27/05/2025 13:10

ButterflyHatched · 27/05/2025 13:04

Thankfully Spiked only holds readership amongst a small proportion of people who self-identify in any way with the political left, though those strains of thought are sadly ascendant in the form of Blue Labour's ongoing brutalisation of trans people, picking right up where the Tory culture warriors left off when their party disintegrated around them.

What are you waffling about Spiked for? Brutalisation? Labour are brutalising people who identify as trans? Please provide an example of brutalisation?

Er, so men can self identify as women and they are women, but no one except trans allies can identify as left wing? Riiiight.

JazzyJelly · 27/05/2025 13:10

nolongersurprised · 27/05/2025 10:13

let's face it no one's opinion here is going to change from an argument ion Mumsnet.

mine did. I went from #bekind to realising that trans ideology is largely a men’s sexual rights movement, with the chemical castration of vulnerable children as collateral damage.

Same here. If presented with compelling arguments and evidence, I would change it again.

I don't think it's very likely, since all anyone on that side seems to have is 'be kind!' and 'die in a fire, TERF', but I'm open to the possibility.

ButterflyHatched · 27/05/2025 13:12

RedToothBrush · 27/05/2025 12:57

If you don't want to get into that habit, I think that ship has already sailed.

You'd know I suppose. Between you, Datun, Helleofabore and many of the less memorable posters who have come and gone over the years, I think you've pretty resoundingly 'oh no you didn't'd every single aspect of my transition I've ever disclosed, to the point where it has reached pantomime levels of childish contrarianism

MrsOvertonsWindow · 27/05/2025 13:12

ButterflyHatched · 27/05/2025 12:54

I don't want to get into the habit of questioning other people's self-declarations, especially on a site like this which is so dependent upon a culture of honest, frank disclosure. However...

That particular poster does have something of a whiff of the 'I had a haircut once; here is how I escaped the evil trans cult!' detrans grift about them, it has to be said.

😂😂
The sweat of misogyny and desperation is in the air. Amazing how men being told no can unleash such hyperbole and seething fury against women speaking out in favour of women's rights and safeguarding children.

The age old story.

LadyBracknellsHandbagg · 27/05/2025 13:12

AYoungTransWoman · 27/05/2025 08:39

No. Your win is fairly similar to the homophobes win with section 28. It's going to do a lot of damage to our community but we will win in the end.

The politics of hate and division will not win in the end, it never does.

One of the biggest things I notice about this ideology is their almost complete inability to think critically and interpret facts. But I suppose if you are unable to accept that you are NOT born in the wrong body you won’t have the capacity to understand anything else.

Also, the juvenile statements such as ‘hate and division won’t win’ as a knee jerk response to people saying that sex can’t be changed, that it is binary and immutable. It’s pure toddler rage.

teawamutu · 27/05/2025 13:13

ButterflyHatched · 27/05/2025 13:07

Oh just a small thing - you know, VE day.

Commemorating the close of a years-long ordeal triggered by fascists demonstrating that asking nicely sometimes doesn't work.

It's a little hard to find that message buried amongst all the flags and braying about 'immigrant invaders' though, so I'd forgive you for missing it.

Genuinely one of the most disgusting things I've ever read on MN.

You're a man being told to use the men's toilets, not Anne Frank.

How dare you?

RinklyRomaine · 27/05/2025 13:15

teawamutu · 27/05/2025 13:13

Genuinely one of the most disgusting things I've ever read on MN.

You're a man being told to use the men's toilets, not Anne Frank.

How dare you?

This is what makes my blood boil more than anything else, and it’s constant. Misery leeches disgust me at any time but this utilisation of such horror leaves me raging. It is grotesque.

BlueEyedBogWitch · 27/05/2025 13:15

ButterflyHatched · 27/05/2025 13:07

Oh just a small thing - you know, VE day.

Commemorating the close of a years-long ordeal triggered by fascists demonstrating that asking nicely sometimes doesn't work.

It's a little hard to find that message buried amongst all the flags and braying about 'immigrant invaders' though, so I'd forgive you for missing it.

Are you seriously equating your ‘struggle’ with that of the Allies against Fascism?

My mother was without a father until she was five, because he was serving in El Alamein. He was temporarily blinded in an explosion and in a military hospital for six months.

My uncle was in a POW camp in Italy, until he and a few others managed to escape.

They would consider themselves as having got off lightly. They didn’t die in a foreign field before ever having fully lived, so that people like you could consider yourselves oppressed because you’re not allowed to piss next to a girl.

I mean…you could make the noble sacrifice of peeing at home and buying clothes online. That way you can count yourself among ‘the few’.

For fuck’s sake.

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