Man pushed ahead of woman to use female toilet

[BlossomIsSoPretty]

This didn't directly affect me as I have use disabled toilets, but I was out earlier and there was one male, one female, and one disabled toilet. There were 3 men and 1 woman waiting. One of the men was about to go into the disabled toilet when he saw me. I have no choice but to use disabled (wheelchair user). The female toilet became vacant and the man walked towards the door. The woman waiting was quite young and looked surprised but didn't say anything. I'm far from young and used to speaking up for myself, so I pointed out that it was a toilet for females and unless I was mistaken he wasn't female. He said no but I'm desperate and went in anyway.

So not only do women have to put up with men pretending to be women, we now have a man who decided he was going to use the women's toilet anyway!

I think the man sounds like a bit of an entitled twat for assuming his desperation trumped everyone else's.

Having said that, I don't have a huge problem with a man using a self-contained ladies toilet if a woman wasn't waiting (in this case, maybe if he'd let the woman go first and you were left with just the three men waiting) and he was desperate.

I've got IBS and it comes on very suddenly and out of the blue sometimes. That makes me feel quite panicky about dashing to the nearest loo. Yes he should have said something before cutting in but I'd give him the benefit of the doubt. It's not as if men have all suddenly decided to use the ladies! It's a one off and several posters have said they use the men's so can't really complain

What a ridiculous and extreme reaction!

Isn't it just!

Calm down. I’m no handmaiden. I just can’t get worked up over where people of either sex have a pee, yet it’s taken over half of MN.

“I have discovered that my friend’s DH uses the same toilet as her and her DD! He is obviously a rapist. Should I report him to SS or the Police?”

It’s insane.

If you don't understand the issues by now I suspect it's intentional.

But honestly, your post was extremely funny.

Hysterical strawmen are often set up to attack women who register even mild annoyance about the infringement of their rights and the reinterpretation of, "this entitled man shoved past a woman into facilities specifically reserved for her and I'm annoyed about it," to, "women want men to have to hold their pee until they die of kidney failure," is a classic of the genre. 😁

Being told to 'calm down' and accusing women of hysteria is generally the most very basic MRA response to any women expressing anything other than delighted, humble obedience to male dominance or aggression.

It doesn't generally work very well on feminists.

It's much more likely that he has a bowel problem. Men can literally hold on to wait for a pee!

There is a lot of conflating of different issues here. 'Do you want him to piss himself?', 'Maybe he has a medical condition' etc.

The crux of the matter is that a man pushed in front of a woman already waiting to use a toilet that he isn't entitled to use. It seems that if a woman had done this to another woman, we'd have a right to complain but, as it was man, everyone is making up irrelevant excuses for him with no thought to the woman. Who knows, maybe she was about to piss herself and maybe she has a medical condition.

It’s humour, it’s called hyperbole. 🙄

Yes I agree

We all know women are conditioned to be more thoughtful than men. A women in this situation would have absolutely explained herself

Disappointed so many are making excuses for his behaviour

why didn’t he push in front of the men’s queue?

Oh I know. Utterly ridiculous and, as I said, very funny!

These crazy wimmins, eh?!

I think this might be another example of the harms done by the trans agenda.

I think, that in an ideal world, we would all know that no man would enter, let alone queue jump the ladies unless 100% necessary, and on the very rare occasions it happened it could be forgiven (ideally after an explanation).

But this is not an ideal world, women are treated like second class citizens, and women have no reason to suppose that this man queue jumped for any other reason that he believes himself to be more important than the women who were queuing. Women are sick of men in their spaces, whereas, I believe, 15 years ago they were more tolerant of the odd GNC man in there. The fucks have run out as they say.

TLDR - 10 or 20 years back I would have been slightly sympathetic to the man... now, none at all.

Actually, reading my post back, maybe it is not a harm done by the trans agenda. Maybe the truth is that by making women less tolerant of the odd man in women's spaces TQ+ ideology has done women a favour in a way.

But so what? I just don't get all this headspace and time dedicated to a single man who at one time - as far as we're aware - jumped the toilet queue.

Perhaps out of entitlement, perhaps out of desperation, but what difference does it make? It's not as if men everywhere are pushing ahead of women to go into the women's toilets. Why is the single, minorly-selfish action of one man one time, so important as to warrant a report on MN and a discussion?

@Nominative: "Women regularly use men's toilets when the queue for the ladies is too long. Why can't it work the other way?"

When I was at Munich Airport, a few planes arrived at the same time, and the queue outside the ladies toilets (6 or 8 cubicles) was about 15 metres/30 women. The Gents was almost empty and when one man came out I asked him, are there any more men inside the Gents? He said No, and I said Okay, we're going to occupy it for the next minutes. I remember he looked at the huge queue, and said Okay. I knocked and called out and went inside with a few other women.

That is how it is done. The guy in the original post did nothing of the sort, and that is why he is being grilled here.

Because it is symptomatic of a wider issue with regards male entitlement in toilets and wider society? Whether the male entitlement comes from men or men identifying as trans?

"Why is the single, minorly-selfish action of one man one time, so important as to warrant a report on MN and a discussion?"

Like others said its a symptom. And by discussing it, maybe more women become aware of the everyday selfishness or entitlement of men, and maybe next time the young lady waiting will dare to say "Hey, I was here first, and you are not jumping the queue."

Is it though?

Let's leave aside trans women, as they are a distinct group with a specific broader ideology (ie that feelings trump facts and there is such a thing as one's own truth). For them toilet usage is just part of their greater agenda.

Barring that, has it been your experience that men often jump the queue to use women's toilets? Or even regularly use women's toilets without jumping the queue?

I’ve often used men’s loos in theatres. Never enough women’s.

Did he asked the woman waiting if she was desperate? Sorry I keep forgetting it's irrelevant how women are feeling isn't it. Obviously a man's desperation outweighs a woman's. Obviously.

Thank you for reminding me of my place FancyLilacHare

I have acted in an entitled manner at times as I believe I am equal and should be treated as though I am

Its funny how since having a son I have realised more than ever how unequal our society is

He should have asked, should have apologised profusely. And it depends how old he was. When the prostate starts misbehaving, men are totally taken aback by the concomitant rinary incontinence. Men swan through life with those apparently huge bladders - and then their world changes and they have no experience of 'toilet mapping' and the 'precautionary wee' which women learn much earlier because pelvic floor problems mean we get stress incontinence so early in life - you know you can't safely lift the shopping so you go and pee first. Men are late learners on urinary urgency and thunderstruck by the whole prostate issue, and we all get self-focused when we know we're about to wet ourselves. I have some charity on this one. But he should have asked.

Yes?