Gender Neutral Loos

[LoveCherryTree]

So I went to a restaurant on Saturday with my girl friends. I go to the loo, and a lad walks out of one of the cubicles, ok, that’s ok, bit surprised, I go into another, finish and walk out to wash my hands, another guy also in the “communal” part of the loo….feeling slightly nervy about being alone in a room with two strange men, but try to just do what I usually do, wash my hands, both men come to stand either side of me and ask me if I’m having a good night, try and just be polite and say yes whilst trying to just get out of there, when one says, “do you fancy a better night?”
they both get too close for comfort and start cornering me towards one of the cubicles whilst laughing. I am literally panicking thinking what the hell, luckily another two women walk through the door and the guys laugh and walk out.
I’m sorry, but I’m not a nervous person, but this really scared me, why do we need communal loos, AIBU to ask if we could just stick to male and female separate loos to avoid such incidences and I’m not saying all men are the same! I’m just saying, walking into a communal loo with a stranger or two can be bloody nerve wracking?

So because you haven’t experience something it never happens??

What else haven’t you experienced? Have you ever been to space, or summitted Everest? So I’m guessing no one else has? You have a very odd view of life.

It's OK in most busy places during the day. In the evening, or in isolated places or where men are drinking I wouldn't feel comfortable or safe.
It's very different going into a library toilet during the day where a man is at the sink area, to going into toilets at a bar where a drunk man is in there and music is blasting outside.

How strange. Maybe you missed all the newspaper articles about schoolgirls getting sexually assaulted and attacked in the mixed sex toilets in schools?

Depends on the work cultre as access to money depends on employment and being screened as a reasonably safe member of the workforce reduces the risk.

And i guess you have never met a man that you would not trust or been sadly let down by one you did when you realised he was actually a creep.

But its not just a physical risk

https://www.itv.com/news/anglia/2022-03-25/ikea-admits-toilet-cameras-accidentally-filmed-warehouse-workers-in-bathroom

And its mainly men who place cameras in toilets

https://m.belfasttelegraph.co.uk/news/health/man-arrested-after-recording-device-allegedly-found-in-belfast-hospital-toilet/a1600040325.html

The Social contract reduce the need for bouncers

The OP and any risk adverse woman would think right couple of possible drunk/high perverts if she seen them in a single sex space and not have even paused to do any type of social intetaction before heading to the door or screaming for help etc

And the men entering the SSS would be aware they risked a police record or a criminal conviction from their conduct.

Name and shame the restaurant.
Seriously, it won't be outing for you, but it will warn other women.
Tell us the name and location.

It is totally avoidable and again, sadly women will be the casualties of the relentless push to allow men into spaces where we are vulnerable.

We know that mixed sex facilities where women are undressed account for a far higher rate of sexual assault and voyeurism but they are still being constructed en masse.

There is also an inexplicable number of women desperate to demonstrate that they are super happy with mixed sex facilities despite the increased risk to their safety - maybe they are just blissfully unaware - I have no idea why.

Maybe it’s because they seem to hang out in unusually grotty places where the ladies toilets are not clean so they are under the (false) impression that women’s toilets are as dirty as men’s. I can’t work it out really.

They certainly seem to have no sympathy for the countless numbers of schoolgirls made to feel horrendously uncomfortable by having to use mixed sex toilet cubicles with communal wash area in schools. Despite a number of rapes and sexual assaults. Again, I can’t fathom this mindset.

I visited a large church with neutral toilets recently. I had to use a cubicle that a man had just vacated as there was a queue. He’d left the seat up, the rim was covered in piss and he’d not flushed. Nothing massively shocking in the scheme of things but it made me feel so angry as I then had to confront a stranger’s bodily fluids and put the seat down like I’m cleaning up after him. I wanted to track him down and confront the arrogant cunt about his disgusting mess and disgusting entitlement but who is going to look like the mad one in that scenario? It’s just so unfair.

Yes, this whole shift towards ‘gender neutral’ in order to avoid a row with the men clamouring to get into women’s spaces is strongly detrimental to women.

That makes it all the more perplexing that so many women are so desperate to signal their wonderful ‘virtuousness’ and welcome such facilities.

I’m wondering if these women just have a lack of hygiene standards or genuinely don’t mind cleaning up unknown men’s urine and faeces before using the toilet. It’s a mystery.

This obsession with public toilets is getting so bloody boring.

Are we saying that women always leave the public loo in a clean state because that is absolutely not my experience. A long time ago when I worked in pubs and had to clean the toilets the women's were definitely more grim that the men's at the end of the night. Not just urine and poo.but used sanitary products left on the floor. Absolutely vile.

Its a really clear title

not interested? Don’t open it

people coming on to threads saying how boring they find these types of threads is incredibly boring

😴

Oh gosh youve sent yourself to sleep….how sweet 😀

Tbh i couldnt care less about public loos.
Its not my bathroom its a public toilet if i need a pee when im out i`ll use the loos without any thought.
Or i could just crouch down in a bush.
I think there is to much carrying on over bloody toilets some of you posters have way to much time on your hands that or you just like to moan.
Stop finding fault in everything and get on with life we are not around for ever so whats the point in it all.
Smile lifes short.

I hope that if you were to be arrested you would be Ok with being searched by a person of the other sex

And if you are not pushed for time do
• prisons,
• calling rapists she or her in the courts,
• recording male crimes as being female crimes
..

If you read my post I didn’t comment on the cleanliness of women’s toilets but as you are so keen to discuss them, I imagine you must hang out in some pretty grotty places. I have also cleaned in pubs and been out to many many public places and never seen anything remotely like you describe. How odd.

Do you hang out in these places with the very recently discovered crop of 6 foot+ burly hairy ‘transmen’ that only trans activists seem to know, by any chance? It is interesting that only women who like to argue against female only spaces seem to encounter these filthy women’s toilets so frequently as well.

Wow you're an angry one 😂 😂 😂 😂

I never said I was a trans activist so I'm not sure where you got that from. I'm simply stating it's ridiculous to comment on women having to clean men's urine and faeces from toilets when it's definitely not a gender specific issue.

Obviously you've tried to insult me by saying I hang out in grotty places. However regardless of where I hang out if it was women making the mess then it makes no difference whether the place is grotty or not does it since your point is about men in toilets.

Oh and lastly it seems that you're trying to make out that in lying about being in filthy women's bathrooms which I'm not. However the more the ridiculousness of these types of threads go on I am doubting the credibility and motives of the OPs.

I'm not a trans activist by the way and I do think that some places should definitely be gender specific however I feel like this obsession with toilets takes away from the whole debate.

You have a very strange perception of people’s feelings as well as interesting boundaries. I’m not angry.

Why are you so desperate to denigrate women?

If the hand basin is inside the cubicle then I don’t mind. I just don’t want to stand next to a bloke when I’m washing my hands - I don’t really want to be in the loo with them at all but there you go. It is the way it will go.

The Tate Modern last weekend, filthy toilets and men walking in and out. I really don’t want to mix with them, so I walked out & waited until we got to Euston.
I’m sick to the back teeth of men bulldozing their way into our spaces.

Haha I'm not. What a weird thing to say.

I don't agree with this obsession with toilets and I don't agree with your point about mess in the toilets. Your reply to me did come across as angry.

Nothing to do with you being a woman.

Single sex men's toilet + single sex women's toilet + accessible toilet for disabled people [and ONLY disabled people, note!] has worked fine for ages.
Why change it? Because a tiny number of people 'feel uncomfortable'? There has to be a better rationale than that.

Yet here you are spending so much time hanging out on this thread. 🤷‍♀️

My post that you say you disagreed with said:

I’m wondering if these women just have a lack of hygiene standards or genuinely don’t mind cleaning up unknown men’s urine and faeces before using the toilet. It’s a mystery.

That is a question - I’m not sure you can disagree with a question.

Hard to avoid these threads lately to be fair.

Yep you said

I’m wondering if these women just have a lack of hygiene standards or genuinely don’t mind cleaning up unknown men’s urine and faeces before using the toilet. It’s a mystery.

And all I said was that in my experience it's not only men that leave faeces and urine to be cleaned up. Then you started going on about 6 foot burly men and calling me a trans activist. Quite odd.

Unisex loos are supposed to have floor to ceiling walls and include the sink. I wouldn’t use cubicles with shred sinks with men.