Is there any future you'd accept for trans people?

[AYoungTransWoman]

Hello, I'm a young trans person who transitioned in my teens. I've been on hormones my entire adult life, have a GRC and will have Gender Reassignment Surgery imminently.

Is there any future you would accept for people like me who have gone through everything?

I don't know much about transgender
Well, you got that part right at least @Readmorebooks40 Did it occur to you while writing your rather patronising msg that many women here DO have first-hand experience? And they are not just scared or fed-up?

Yes, we do understand. Particularly many of us suffered from gender dysphoria as teenagers and children ourselves. We also understand because we know people who have transgender identities and some have people we love who have transgender identities.

@AYoungTransWoman please listen to this. This can easily happen to you if you have surgery!

Why is hateful to understand biological facts? People can’t change their sex. Why is it hateful to understand that TIM’s offend at exactly the same rate as men, and in the case of sexual assault at a slightly higher rate?
Why is it hateful to understand that men in general are predatory towards women whoever they identify?
Why is it hateful to understand that the vast majority of TIM’s keep their genitalia, which means they pose the same risk as any other male?

Oh gosh that sounds so difficult. Sending hugs.
very very sound advice - we all feel invulnerable when we are young. I’m only in my 50s but the realisation that some random bit of plumbing could go at any moment is an uncomfortable thought to live with!

The slightest hint of critical thinking would tell you that those two statistics can't both be correct.

There is no backlash on trans rights. Trans women currently have the same rights as everyone else. The ‘backlash’ is biological men wanting additional rights that they’re not entitled to, because they are trans. There’s a difference.

They won’t be accepted as women because they aren’t women. It’s that simple. Just like a white person won’t be accepted as black just because they feel they are, or a 40 year old won’t be accepted as an 18 year old and so forth.

This blind ‘if you say you’re a woman I’ll believe you’ helps no one. Despite how kind, liberal and progressive you think you’re being.

If you want us to say it's ok for you to keep using women's spaces then no. That's never going to be ok. Regardless of how you feel about your body and your sex, you should know that most women don't want you in our spaces and you're not welcome. You're only allowed to use them because women are being legally and socially coerced into not objecting. If that makes you feel bad - sorry but it should. You're transgressing women's boundaries every time you use your fraudulent identification to access a women's space.

There's never really been a time I haven't felt this way. Being a woman just feels, normal. Trying to be a boy just didn't feel like me. Didn't have anything to do with my hair or my clothes, most of the time I wear jeans, hoodies, a coat, etc. They're comfortable and that's all I need for everyday life like if I'm going food shopping etc. Never really known what caused my dysphoria as I've never known life without it.

Like the person who asked you the original question- I’d love to know what you mean when you say “being a woman”?

In what way do you think you are living as a woman? What does it mean to you? Is it just hair and make up?

To answer your original question, "Is there any future you would accept for people like me who have gone through everything?", it's not about me accepting anything. What I hope for you is that you personally find peace and happiness as you are and an acceptance that you can never be a woman no matter how you damage your physical body. I also hope that in the future, therapy for young people with dysmorphia and any other mental health problems improves and young people are helped to realise that they are perfect just as they are. That they cannot change sex but that they can dress how they want, love who they want, be who they want to be without resorting to major surgery and hormones in search of something that is biologically impossible. I hope that the upcoming youth realise that sticking a label on themselves or mutiliating themselves is never the answer to their problems.

@AYoungTransWoman Please may I now ask you a genuine question? If you were out and about and really needed to use the toilet and there were no third spaces, only male and female toilets, do you think you should be allowed to use the female toilets because you fear going in to the men's? If you do, how far do you consider the fear of women (women who may for religious reasons can't share with men or women who have been sexually assaulted or women who just simply don't want to share their space with men)? Would you think your fear outweighs theirs and go in anyway or would you use the male toilets out of respect?

But you’re not ‘being a woman’. You’re being you, pretending to be a woman, acting in a way you think women act.

If behaving in that way makes you feel happy then I wish you all the best and would obviously not interfere in how you want to live your life. But you aren’t being a woman.

I’m not sure what you mean by ‘trying to be a boy’. You were a boy. You can’t try to be one.

Like most people on the thread, I'm not sure what you mean by "a future you would accept for people like me". It's not clear what you're asking.

But if you want me to be honest about the future I would want for you, specifically? It would be that you put the brakes on your upcoming medical castration and get some really, really good therapy. Not gender affirming stuff, but something that really challenges you and gets you to dig deep into the root of your insecurities.

And I think you need to look at your relationship with your parents - because I'm sorry to say it, but for you have to gone as far down the path as you have, at such a young age, something is wrong there. They've failed you. I don't know them, so I can't say whether they pushed you into this for their own reasons, or just got caught up in what everyone else was telling them was best for you - but either way, they've let you down and it's going to be painful all round when you realise that.

I would also say that you haven't "done everything" yet. It's not too late to go back. You can stop taking hormones. You can change your documentation back to male. You can cancel or delay the surgery for as long as you want - no matter how much pressure is being placed on you to rush through it. You're so young. The future I would want for you would be to take your time and be really sure before you do anything, because some things you can't take back.

I appreciate your answers OP.
Can I ask: you say you didn't ever feel like a boy, but how do you know it's a woman that you feel like? How does the feeling of being a woman manifest itself for you if it's not the stereotypical clothes, hair etc?

Just to expand on my previous post, I mean:
is it how you see the world
or
how the world sees you?

Part of the issue here is that the term trans has been bastardised that much that it no longer resembles what it once was.

But then changing the meaning of words is something that the TRAs have been pushing for a long time.

This. I completely understand why OP isn’t comfortable using a men’s bathroom. It simply isn’t safe for them.

Personally, I wouldn’t be scared seeing a transwoman in the women’s bathroom. The issue is with men who are posing as transwomen because they are disgusting, sick human beings. But that is a shit human being problem, not a transwoman problem.

A better solution would be to have a third unisex bathroom but this isn’t readily available yet.

OP I've just read your posts. One day I hope young people experiencing distress with their body will get the help they need to accept it. There is nothing about your healthy body that needs to change. Please read the stories from people who have had surgery and have regretted it. You will ruin your health and your post surgery body will not make you happier.

One day in the future I hope all the people that have lied to you and told you this will help will be held to account for their lies.

Why should you or anyone else who was born with a penis feel entitled to use spaces that were made for someone who wasn't born with a penis.
As usual a males feelings want to override a females feelings.

Of the Trans identifying males in the prison population, just under half have committed sex offences compared to 19% of the rest of the male population. This pattern is repeated everywhere they collect these stats.

there is zero evidence that this subset of males pose less risk to women and children.

How does one tell the difference between a real trans woman and a person pretending to be trans? The pretence transcends both no? How does anyone tell the difference between a male who wishes us no harm to one who does?

Also, why wouldn’t it be safe?

Edited for typos

How do you tell the difference? If they say they are a woman, we're apparently supposed to take that at face value whether they are the OP or Karen White. They are all men pretending.

Ok so I would be labelled a TREF.
I am not really. I just know what is what.
However please see I don't hate you.
Own what you are, really that is all I want.
Most Transwoman seem to dress like a they are off out somewhere posh , or going to a fancy dress party playing a woman.
Most of us are in jeans t shirt and hoodie, comfy shoes and if you tone it down, we will just accept you as are.
Yes I have friends from every type, and just don't want a stronger body type undercutting the advances woman have had to fight for.

That is an absolute lie, @Gonnaenoe . The 1% 'study' has been debunked numerous times as invalid considering it didn't take into consideration those who didn't go through with getting the hormones and those who stopped filling their prescriptions even when they did. Even WPATH acknowledges the regret rate is around 30%. One gender hospital even estimated the regret rate is 42% and steadily rising.