How best to answer 'What are your preferred pronouns?' in an intervew

[NancyDrawed]

I have been out of the workforce for a very long time but finally have an in-person interview later this week.

The confirmation email is signed by a name followed by (he/him/his). I need to get a job. But I am trying to get my head around what I would say if I was directly asked what my preferred pronouns are.

On principle I would like to say 'I'm not a follower of that ideology so use whichever you see fit' or something along those lines, but is that likely to mean I have no chance of getting the job?

I am clearly female, so a small part of me would want to say he/him/his just to see the reaction!

It might not even come up at all, but I'd like to be prepared.

If they're addressing me using third person pronouns, they really need some lessons in grammar. You address someone using second person pronouns, which are gender neutral

In an interview I'd have to consider why they were testing my attitude to 'gender' in this way. If it was a full on 'Stone-wall rules' place - it could be difficult to work in.

How about "people have always referred to me as she and her".

Thank you :)

Yes!

Stick it to em. Sod the job

I'd be flippant and just say "you can call me what you like, as long as you don't call me late for dinner..."

I’d say, ‘I’m really not bothered but female is probably easiest for everyone.’

How do non-binary teachers ask to be alerted by pupils who would usually say Sir or Miss?

I'm quite old so could feign ignorance I suppose?

It's so long since I had an interview that I am playing all sorts of scenarios through in my head and in one of them I'm asked what my preferred pronouns are, so I want to have an answer ready! It might not even come up, of course.

I don't suppose 'standard English is fine but I don't mind Yorkshire dialect either tha' knows' would work.

I'll have a look to see if they are Stonewall Champions, too

It’s unlikely that you will be asked. The person who sent the email may have wanted to put them on or not really thought about the reason to do so. They also might not be interviewing you.

I don't see the big deal. Just say 'she and her is fine, thank you.'

Assuming you actually want a job (and as you identify as female) why would you say anything else?

IME HR are much more likely to 'do pronouns' than any other roles.

I think I would go with "Ah, no fixed preference" and a smile. That'll confuse them 😂

Give them a look as if you don't really understand the question, as it should be so blatenty obvious, then say 'oh, 'she/her' ' with a dismissive wave of the hand (which could be interpreted as 'are people STILL asking about this BOLLOCKS?')

There is a gender neutral "mx" that people use to replace Mrs/miss/ms/mr.

I'm not really sure on the pronunciation, but I assume something like mux

'Oh, you can call me you. I think thee and thou are a bit old fashioned, don't you?'

In reality I'd say 'I'm a she, thanks'

Never understand why you have to give two pronouns, as if anyone is she/him or he/her

If you're in an interview and you want the job don't try to be clever.

If you've no strong feelings say so.

haha, yes just keep saying 'what?' every time they try and explain what they mean.

I'm sorry what does that mean?
' just wondering if you prefer to be called he, or she. or something else'
I'm sorry, what, something else?
'some people prefer to choose their pronouns'
'what?, what does this mean?'

This is an excellent point, like 2nd wave trans activism.... so just say " I feel that asking for pronouns is very transphobic, if someone is unsure of their gender it could be triggering - can we move on"

They will be so scared of offending you i bet they do 😂

"I don't mind" because a) that's completely true and b) it's quick.

I would want my mind clear and my nervous system calm for answering the actual questions. Starting the interview by pretending to have preferred pronouns would feel like I started out by fibbing. Starting with an overt comment about sex based oppression might feel too risqué.

If they didn't immediately move on after my answer I'd be surprised and might try PP's suggestion to turn it back on them with curiosity.

I'd have thought bringing up the personal beliefs or politics of potential employees puts them on dodgy ground.

Ah yes there are! I have a colleague who is she/her on certain days of the week and she/zim on others. And some who are she/he/they

Guess it’s time for this again for all the “but why is it a problem?” comments

it’s because it’s normalising the idea that men can use female pronouns and vice versa and that others should be compelled to go along with it

Me/mine/my