Why do men hate us so much?

[niadainud]

Just off the top of my head, in no particular order:

Incels
Afghanistan
Excessively patriarchal religions where women are totally subservient
Using sex workers
Human trafficking
Domestic violence
Rape
Low-level sexism
Andrew Tate, etc.
Erosion of women's rights including, but not limited to, transactivists
Shitty dating behaviour such as ghosting and negging
Drag / "womanface"

Yes, I know some of the above can be perpetrated by women, but it's usually men, isn't it?

I think it's just because they've been able to! Over the centuries men have been dominant because "work" was physical, manual, and most men were better equipped than us to do it.
Whereas women 's bodies were considered to exist in order to produce more men (or women, in order to produce even more men) and probably to die soon afterwards.
So men just don't give us much thought. We are seen, if seen at all, as "secondary characters" in this world which exist to produce more "primary characters".
In short I don't think most men HATE us. I think they just don't consider us better than objects which exist to please them.
And they won't accept, and plainly just don't understand, how we can possibly consider ourselves to be their equals in this patriarchal world.

I have always wondered this too. And it’s one way too there just isn’t the widespread visceral hate by women of men. You can’t argue otherwise after even a cursory look at mainstream porn ie violent degradation of women 🙄.

I blame religion. The Abrahamic faiths are deeply mysoginist and render women subservient to men. Religion in Europe was very powerful for centuries effecting everything, law, culture, philosophy etc and society was indoctrinated.

It's argued that the Law of Coverture which subsumed women's rights to men, was influenced by the Christian idea of a couple becoming one flesh after marriage.

If you read religious scholars, women are described in the most vitriolic, base ways. Look at the persecution of witches. We have Christianity to thank for the Virgin/Whore dichotomy and the idea that women are cursed by God to obey men. This has been going on for thousands of years.

It is so odd isn't it.
I think it's because they are physically stronger. They literally wrote the rules of society of laws to suit them and their lives.
They are in so deep they cannot see it, their normal is so suitable for their lives that anything else is secondary & wrong.
I think they would prefer to just ignore us really.

Jealousy of our ability to create life and wanting to harness and control that power. Maybe. I’ve been wondering the same.

I never understand the mindset of males in certain cultures that forbid women to drive, vote, work, study, deal with worldly business etc. And now worse, they should just shut the fuck up, not make a sound and just fuck and cook.

Surely they can see with their own eyes, and even their limited reptilian intellect, a whole world of women who are intelligent and contributing at high levels of politics, medicine, science, research, finance, engineering etc?

Surely they see that this does not undermine men and their ability to have good sexual relationships, companionship and family life with women? In fact, the more they ‘allow’ women to be free, the happier their lives are and the better their society is?

I just don’t get it. What do they ultimately get from enslaving women like breeding animals that they couldn’t have by treating them with dignity and humanity?

I just don’t get it. What do they ultimately get from enslaving women like breeding animals that they couldn’t have by treating them with dignity and humanity?

I get it. They're brought up in cultures where women are seen as inferior and sub human. This is endorsed by religion. They treat women like breeding stock because to them, they are. Women are bought and sold and married as children because they're stripped of rights and dignity.

They simply don't see women as human.

It's that saying again, when you're used to privilege, equality feels like oppression.

So they get angry and lash out.

Because they are allowed to.

Because if women are at the bottom, they aren't.

That's why they hate intelligent and powerful women the most.

Because it's all about power and control.

Also bar Saudi and its oil money the countries that have emancipated women are far wealthier. Not economically smart to basically lose the skills of half the adult population.

Even without religion they would still do it.

Frightened of how powerful women are unless we're being subjugated. Frightened we might rise up and take their power.

Subjugating women eliminates 50% of your possible competition from the entire human race in one fell swoop.

Getting control over them sexually and otherwise is then a powertrip and bonus.

Egos and patriarchy.

Men don’t hate women, the average bloke on the street is not a wife beater, has never raped anyone and is as shocked as everyone else about Afghanistan but can’t really pop over and start an NGO while struggling with mortgage payments. You could list a whole bunch of stats about women murdering and abusing their children and ask mumsnet ‘why do women hate children so much?’

Because they need us more than we need them.

But the numbers of women who murder and abuse their children is far, far lower than the number of men who murder, abuse and rape.

The average man might not do those things, but there is a lot of low level misogyny going on amongst the general male population, even in the supposedly more enlightened countries of the west.

Because women hold the main power- childbirth. Coupled with religion and the demonisation of women since the dawn of time.
My 3 sons abhor the things you've put in your list. Talking, positive role models, challenging hatred. All these things shake young male minds effectively.

It's a very good question OP, and one that's been struggled with for years by all kinds of people. I don't think a definite answer has been found yet though.

FWIW, I'm not sure men do hate women, or rather, I'm not sure they hate them anymore than any other "out group". We see violence against women, children and other men perpetrated by men. I've recently thought that maybe the focus of VAWG should be reframed as VBM - Violence By Men. The common denominator across society is the perpetrator of violence is primarily male, so why not tackle the source of the problem?

"there is a lot of low level misogyny going on amongst the general male population, even in the supposedly more enlightened countries of the west" @Zita60
Agree.

When members of your own family tell you you have equality when you obviously don't and tell you women shouldn't act so hard done by. Sigh. And these are people who I know are really really on my side in life. What does that say about others?

Low level misogyny doesn’t warrant an all men hate us headline. The government has failed repeatedly to tackle social issues that affect women and done little to protect women in DV situations. We should be putting pressure on the government, not pointing fingers at some confused Joe blogs on the street.

Also there’s already enough needless media hysteria without starting it on mumsnet threads. It sounds like ‘I popped out to the chip shop and next thing I know everything was handmaidens tales.’

Low level misogyny doesn’t warrant an all men hate us headline.
It's all part of the big picture.

Men are frightened that if we get power we will treat them as badly as they have trested us.

I'm reading the book 'Eve', and reached the section on the penis. I had been brought up not to risk damaging the area - unless I needed to, but I had no idea how very vulnerable a man is. As a teen I thought it a bit of a joke.
I wonder if there's a bit of fear behind the misogyny.

The men that really dislike women are afraid of women's power over them . They resent that women are 'supposed' to be care givers , nurturers, sexually available , and are afraid and angry with women who don't provide those things .
It's almost atavistic, a deep fear and resentment, coupled with anger and need to control female sexuality. Men are terrified of women cheating on them, having other men's children, and of the power and strength of women's emotions and drives .
Men may be physically stronger than women but mentally can be much weaker .
Usual caveats apply, namalt etc , but you get the drift .