Partner wanting to wear womens clothes during sex

[Uncomfortablybum]

I have just started a thread in relationships and a pp mentioned reading trans widows threads.

Wondering if this is the start of it. Been with my partner 6 months. He has said he would feel excited by the idea of wearing woman's dresses during sex and I am the first person he has felt comfortable with enough to say this to.

I am very open minded. This feels different to a once off thing. Is this how it starts? As a bedroom fetish?

That would be a hard no from me. I'm open minded but this would be repulsive to me.

I'd also feel that the 'first person' issue is just emotional blackmail to get you to agree.

Yes i bet you are the “first person” (not)

BTW DV perps always say “you are the first person i have ever hit”

If he said i have tried this out before but it didnt go well how would you feel about that.

Run for the hills….

Would you get turned off by that? I would. I am up for many things but a man in women's clothes is a hard line of ick for me, even leaving aside the potential for some trans related whatever.

If it turns you on to see him looking like an idiot then crack on.

If it doesn't, bin him and find a manly man.

I agree re "first person ." It's a sweetener to say that you are special and privileged. Which makes it harder for you to reject the idea.

I'd want to know if he's been influenced by porn.

It is autogynophilic.

If this was me when younger, I personally couldn't continue the relationship as I'd have wanted to have children.

There’s a specific trans-widows thread.

But, (and I’ve not had any direct experience, but have read a few accounts), I’d be surprised if he’s only just starting cross dressing. I’d put reasonable money on him having tried it out already, either on his own (most likely using your clothes / underwear) or with a previous partner, with a fair amount of ‘sissy porn’ thrown in.

Your boundaries are entirely your own, just don’t let anyone ride roughshod over them.

Leave

This is the latest trans widows thread

Trans Widows' Escape Committee 6: The Next Generation www.mumsnet.com/Talk/womens_rights/4879982-trans-widows-escape-committee-6-the-next-generation

You decide what you’re comfortable with. It would be a real turn off to me

6 months is no time at all. Lucky you found out this early. It would be a swift cheerio from me.

I had this with an ex. He was a pathological liar, irredeemable porn addict, abusive and in all likelihood a complete narcissistic twatbag. Run for the hills.

Nope

I'd be very wary indeed......

Thankfully you've only been together for six months. though that might also mean you're still in the honeymoon stage when you are not seeing and thinking clearly.

I'd dump him like a shot. Men who want to wear women's clothing during sex are telling you their fantasies are incompatible with heterosexuality. Give him a chance and you'll likely find he's calling himself a lesbian.

Total bollocks your the first person he's felt comfortable enough to do this with. Would be a massive turn off for me. Immediate ditch him.

It would totally take any desire for sex out of me.

One word: Autogynephilia

My vagina would turn to dust instantly.

Not for me thanks.
is he suggesting wearing one of your dresses? If so, he’s probably tried them on already. Dh wouldn’t fit into any of mine. Is he suggesting buying some of his own?
Anyway, whichever it is, it doesn’t do it for me.

Don't make it 7 months.

Been with my partner 6 months
End it now.

He has said… I am the first person he has felt comfortable with enough to say this to.
standard lie. To make you feel like you're spécial snd so more likely to do it. Manipulative.

Leave him now before he rinses you if your cash (this goes hand in hand with the autogynophile’s descent - the addiction gets worse and worse and some trans widows end up going bankrupt because of it). Also don’t bring any kids into this if you can help it.

agree with other poster’s - he’s manipulating you by telling you your the first one he’s ever told.

https://committees.parliament.uk/writtenevidence/16110/html/

6 months? Get out now. You're not married, you don't have children together, I'm assuming you don't live together yet either. In short, a clean break is very do-able - and you should do it.

I agree with what has already been said about his claim that you are "the first person he has felt comfortable with enough to say this to." Highly unlikely, he's just trying to manipulate you. Make you feel special. Make you take ownership of his behaviour, feel responsible for him, feel you have to be supportive, #BeKind, put your wishes/preferences/needs second, third, last, way behind his wishes/preferences/needs and you're a big meanie if you don't.

This is nothing to do with being open-minded. Except that perhaps he thinks you'll be easier to manipulate, because you won't want to think of yourself as closed-minded, and he can use that against you. Has he already hinted at that?

Get out now. Whilst it's still straightforward.