Ginny - an update

[idontknowwhattosay23]

Massive apologies for the delay in an update. It's been tricky to know how to word it so that I don't get into trouble or have to ask for it to be taken down again. Plus I've been so depressed with the situation I haven't really known what to say.

I won't be able to post the full story as before so really this is only for the benefit of those that read the last (now deleted) thread and wondered what happened / can remember the details.

The meeting went ahead as planned, although with the massive twist that it wasn't actually just myself and "Ginny" but was turned into a whole office meeting, which turned into just giving Ginny a platform to talk about her life as a trans woman (all 6 months of it) and how she is constantly objectified by men, sexually harassed and cat called and suffers far more than any cis woman and as such, deserves (and needs so she doesn't harm herself) the support and cooperation of everyone in the office, especially other women. No, I'm not joking.

The tampon / being in the women's toilet issue was brushed under the carpet as quickly as possible and explained to us as a complex matter of dysphoria that we couldn't possibly grasp and was not to be spoken about again. We were then informed that female sanitary products would be provided by management in ALL toilets, men's women's and the disabled toilets to avoid any future "misunderstanding". I was asked if I wanted to apologise for my outburst and make a fresh start with Ginny, I did so because as I said in the last thread, I really need this job at the moment. I'm so disappointed in myself for doing so and feel gross. But I couldn't do anything else. I want to thank all those that said to just suck it up and apologise, it saved me my job 100% no question about it.

Overall it was bordering humiliating for all involved, we were spoken to like children and patronised beyond belief. Ginny has been given a new desk set up right by the bosses office, best view, newest computer and a client list that even people who have been there 10+ years wouldn't usually get a look in on and have been working hard to secure for a long time... myself and two other women have been relocated to the back office. Apparently absolutely unrelated incidents, based on "the continuing restructure of company operations to maximise productivity and output". Two men have handed in their notice, again entirely unrelated.... (I can't say much, please put the pieces together yourselves ❤️)

I'm speaking now because frankly I'm dreading Monday, as in physically feel crap and absolutely can't face going in, but for now I have to. I'm actively looking for another job and have had my 3 weeks holiday approved from mid-July so I just need to get through a week and a half and I'm free of the nonsense for a bit to regroup and figure out what I do next.

It's no understatement to say I am utterly baffled as to why there is such massive special treatment for Ginny, considering the huge mistakes they have made since starting and the constant drama. Current theories floated by colleagues suggest either the boss believes that this is legally how trans people need to be treated in the workplace and is entirely uneducated in it, thus airing massively on the side of caution and has pushed inclusivity so far he's excluded everyone else. And another theory to do with crushes that I couldn't possibly repeat.

So there we have it. I'm sorry it took a while to update, there is plenty more happening that I just can't really share at the moment. But when I can I will.

but thinking about it: employers may start to buck the "unisex" toilets trend when they find out they have to provide disposal bins for sanitary products, and pay for them to be emptied, even if they are never ever being used or are never likely to be used.

Bottom line always wins. Every time, IME

The reasons for seeking a new job should be about ambition and needing more scope to do the good work you're capable of, possibly with a seasoning on thinking the new job seems better organised than the old one, not principally about the deficiencies of your old employer.

You want them to think you're the best, not a poor old runaway.

Absolutely - it's positives like new challenges, building on experience and developing your career, not negatives such as "My previous employer has gone round the twist"!

Very much agree with this. Always frame it positively, rather than negatively. It's about what you have to offer your potential employer, in-line with your own growth and professional development.

Maybe the answer is for every employee to decide they are trans and do the minimum to pass (I understand Ginny isn't exactly trying very hard).

Then everyone can be special together and Ginny will, of course, be delighted that Ginny is not the only afflicted one in the company.

Yes of course. However a previous poster mentioned they left a similarly unpleasant situation and took a lesser paid job just to get away, ie couldn't describe it as career enhancement.

I have a bit of an update, will share properly when I get home this evening but there's a new sign been put up on the women's bathroom door 🙃 I'll get a picture and post it up temporarily later for you all to see.

This day can get in the bin 😂

the male sanitary bin? There’s plenty space on that one

tease...

what time do you finish?

I meant to say - unpleasant though it might be, if I were you OP I'd bag up my used sanpro and take it home for disposal.
You know some of these men like to rootle through the sanPro bins ?
I'm not going to enlarge on the reasons why. 🤮 There are articles about it and I think there's a name for it too.
I just wouldn't want to give someone that opportunity. And I wouldn't hang any clothes eg coats or anything else in an area where someone passing could amuse themselves by trying them on either.

They put them up their arses. Not even kidding.

Deep breaths Op - stay strong.

Looking forward to the update. I DO think sometimes in life it is wiser to do, as here, the apology, the keep the job as someone has to feed the children. However collectively as a nation we need to stop this nonsense somehow.

If Ginny has been given more than is deserved then hopefully the clients will not appreciate it and as ever money will be at the heart of it. Money may even be why the boss kowtowed to Ginny because bad publicity Ginny might cause otherwise could have meant customers boycotting the firm in these terrible of times where one false word and you can destroy a life time's business.

Can you log as inappropriate every single time they bring up knickers or penises etc, I fucking hate the way that these TWArwn'tW come along and slip into their perceived identity of what women are and how we talk about such things when we've spent our lives fighting against being pidgin holed as giggly sex obsessed idiots who find the constant abuse funny and thrive on it.

There must be some way of turning the tables OP?

You have been absolutely brilliant, I can't believe you haven't totally flipped out and strangled him with his red lacy Ann summers g string by now (because that's what proper women wear everyday!!)

Just hope Ginny has been roped in to help the new starters. They'll run a ducking mile!!

Please let your temporarily last until the other side of the world wakes up.

I recently realised that I may have worked with a very early prototype ‘Ginny’ during a 1990s Christmas job in a large department store.

They were employed as a temporary worker on a concession to sell a stereotypically female product. They were friendly and pleasant but couldn’t seem to stop making remarks about their sexual activity. For example, when leaving early, ‘I have to go now, my boyfriend’s waiting for me in bed’. Or, ‘Sorry I’m late, I was in bed with my boyfriend.’ One of the male temps said something along the lines of them being ‘a bloke dressed up’. Being about nineteen I didn’t have a clue and thought the male temp was just being a bit crude - and was too busy trying to actually stick to the gruelling shifts involved in flogging cosmetic sets throughout Christmas shopping hours, plus an unpleasant train commute. However I wonder now if the temporary job was a way to try out a new identity?

Perhaps this is a clue to the sudden change in your boss - his friend Steve asked for a job as a way of trying out being ‘Ginny’ and therefore he feels somehow responsible for the success of Ginny’s cover?

As much as I'd like to see it please don't post a photo, it would be too identifiable.

Agree with pp. Describe the sign don’t post a photo.

Maybe when you get your new job - having assured new employers you have gained knowledge and experience (little do the know) from existing job, you are ready to move on and widen your work experience for career progression (and have heard good things about the company/their area of work?)

And was so looking forward to the image of the sign, but maybe others are right (sigh).

But could keep us all waiting until settled in new job - and then post?

How did the induction go?

I agree - DO NOT post an image of the sign. Definitely identifiable.

But please describe it.

No, but you can still spin it that you're taking a job to go in a new direction, learn different skills or even that you want a less stressful job/one that requires less of your time because you want to focus on pursuits in your personal life/take up studies or whatever.

Basically just any old shite as long as it sounds positive to the recruiter!

Have any of the Male Toilets got a shiny new sign?

Anyone want to bet me a pack of dark chocolate Tunnocks that the sign will be wittering on about inclusivity? Or one of those ghastly 'if you see someone in the toilets you're not sure about, shut your little lady mouth because they know better than you'?

It will be that one.

I've seen the one.

'Protect them from harm'.

Right on, because as a woman (cf. human support vessel) that's automatically my job. And fuck any harm (involuntary trauma responses; I've been a rape victim) that does to me. I'm just collateral damage.

Forgive the pun, but it boils my piss.