‘Bonus hole’

[bblackmirror]

So I can’t believe this is real but it seems to be.
What do we make of Jo’s cervical trust a cancer charity who has an LGBT inclusive language page on their website suggesting another word for a vagina is a bonus
hole!!

Absolutely awful.

"Your hole" is what my rapist called my vagina.

This language isn't just offensive, it triggers traumatic memories for me in a context where I'm already anxious about my sexual violence history and its psychological sequelae, especially in respect of the smear test process.

@VitoCorleoneOfMNMafia that is awful, you poor thing x It's a horrible, vulgar term & you really would need to question who in that charity deemed it appropriate.

If my dd had been taught “bonus hole” at school I would have gone nuclear. Is that where we will be in a year or two ?
As everyone has said -totally and utterly inappropriate, demeaning, inaccurate and somehow both infantile yet over sexualised.

Totally agree! So gross!

@Moonandstarzz Thank goodness your ds is getting the correct teaching - I don't have little ones, but from what I've read, if I did, it would be something that would really concern me. Interesting that the teacher emailed the information to parents... Was that because the teacher was making a point to reassure parents that their children ARE being taught correct biology, given the strange times we find ourselves in? If so, that teacher is awesome!

Vita I am so sorry. How horrendous for you to read this.
Many women will have had men refer to their genitals in dehumanising terms like this.
How do we complain ? It really is unbelievably awful.

This.

It's OK for Bravissimo to call the organs supported by a bra "boobs" but I would expect a breast cancer charity to use the term "breasts". Different context, and much more serious.

@FrankieStar I'm in Ireland & so far with my dc it's been fine but they are young, eldest is 9 & this was the first proper sex ed with terminology that he has had.. However the sex ed curriculum is due to be "updated" so lord only knows what will be in there.

Trans men Do though . So it will be trans men that don't like talking about having a vagina

@FrankieStar his teacher emailed out the document she was covering & asked us to discuss as part of home work prior to the lesson in school. Nothing offending (that I personally would take offence to😉) in the document. Was about where babies come from, female, male, vagina, penis, mother & father were words used. Very simple but correct, age appreciate terminology. I was happy with it.

@Flickersy
Can't see any women diagnosed with cancer being happy with their cancerous body parts being called fun bags (breast cancer) or bonus holes (cervical cancer).

As everyone has said -totally and utterly inappropriate, demeaning, inaccurate and somehow both infantile yet over sexualised.

That really.

But why don't trans men have surgery to get penises. Men have penis after all. This is where I'm lost!

Many women will have had men refer to their genitals in dehumanising terms like this.

And frequently in abusive or harassing or otherwise misogynist contexts.

"You were just a hole to poke" -- an ex-bf.

"A warm wet hole" is how MRAs and their ilk refer to women. "Pump and dump" is a similar charming phrase.

This is not how a charity set up to support women at their most scared should refer to our bodies.

World has gone mad

It's harder to create a phallus than to cut an incision and invert a penis.

Also, transmen largely transition to gain male privilege and lose female oppression. They can achieve that with testosterone, double mastectomy, and a packer.

Who the hell are the people in charge of this charity??!!

@VitoCorleoneOfMNMafia or any mumsnetter up to speed... there is so much coverage regarding transwomen that this is kind of in the background so to speak.. But do transmen use men's toilets, changing rooms, prisons & compete in men's sports & on mens sports teams?

This is so heartening to hear tbh. Although i don't have kids, and will never, there will come a point when all the children grow up to be the decision makers that affect all our lives won't they.

I tend to think that amongst all the little folk out there right now and yet to be born, are our future politicians, policy makers, medics, journalists, and of course future teachers... And so many more that will go on to have various careers that shape the future of society; ultimately how well society functions will be in their hands, at the moment it's in ours with what we teach them. I can't help but feel that the education children get now, whatever that is, is going to reverberate for years to come - a lot of what is going on when put into this context, is really frightening at the moment. It feels like we're heading down a really awful trajectory for women and we're in danger of society in some ways just becoming very, very regressive 😫

Must be god awful for some teachers at the moment too. I bet some of them feel like they're selling their soul if they're in a school where teaching biological reality is seen as unscientific fact!

@OrbandSpectacle I think you may be thinking of Flounder???

An important question is what lies behind such odd language. It sounds like pure misogyny to me, i.e., the hatred of the female body and the desire to rename its parts so that it wouldn't appear to exist at all.

So many trans people seem to loathe the female body, though for opposite reasons (trans women for not having it, trans men for having it). But there is no similar loathing of the male body, at least I rarely see it mentioned, and expressions like 'girl dicks' are openly used.

We have the right to point out this misogyny and to ask why what one group wishes to do to the language is so much more important than what the vast majority of women (and perhaps of men) want.

It also seems that someone who can't even face up to using the proper anatomical names for the body needs more therapy, because this reluctance might be linked to not wanting to see a health care provider at all.

The solution is for the individual to find a way to be comfortable with the reality of their body, not for reality to be linguistically denied so much that others (who also have rights) no longer have any words to describe their own experiences or to organise around their own political issues.

Can you please explain what top surgery is?

They’ve been like this for a while. A few years back I saw a poster of theirs in my doctors supposedly to encourage women to go for smear tests. Didn’t mention women but the usual ‘anyone with…’ wording. Yuk.

If you arent mature/adult enough to use the correct language for your body parts then you arent mature/capable to make decision.

As for the nurses, if you have not given medically accurate /appropriate information to the patient then how can you sign off as saying that the patient has given informed consent.

They can use what ever fantasy nonsense word they like. But they should put their big boy/girl pants on when it's their health being discussed snd HCP or supporters should absolutely be using correct medical terms.