A year ago a close family member broke ties with me for being a terf. No fall outs previously.

[BluebellBlueballs]

I'm a little sad, exactly one year ago my brother found out I was gender critical and cut me off completely until I 'renounce my views '
He's not transgender or gay but seems to have accepted a woke moral superiority and called me a nazi and bigot for not including males in my definition of women.

I offered to agree to disagree and have a relationship but not talk about this one issue but he wouldn't accept that. Even for my dad's sake who is in his 80s and wants us to make peace.

I won't 'renounce my views ' at his command so despite my offer to agree to not discuss this one issue, we are now estranged.

What do I do? I have no ill intent towards transgender people but I believe in biological sex based definitions of humans and you cannot change sex. I had 2 very difficult pregnancies a man would never have to experience. I have lost my brother to the woke stasi and don't see a way forward.

I have to accept my brother is no longer in my life don't I?

that’s the problem Twelly. I rebelled against my parents but I wasn’t misrepresenting or trying to change the law to force them to go along with my beliefs

@TransMillennial - please do come over to this thread and answer the question:

https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/womens_rights/4780231-what-is-a-woman-by-modern-standards-and-definitions

Thx

You sound quite bitter. There is more to life than this

As an aside, it’s interesting how quickly Millenial ideas are falling out of fashion now that Zoomers and Alphas are looking to the 1990s and 2000s for fashion inspo, music and retro media shows.

Friends and Big Bang Theory seem positively refreshing with all their non-woke-jokes.

Millenials are looking a bit cringe compared to Gen X.

I've witnessed one decades long friendship collapse due to one person disagreeing with the other about this. It's fucking insane. Unless you are prepared to accept 'all women are women' you are cut out of their lives. Absolutely no nuance allowed. It's ridiculous.

Using woke as a derogatory word does sound foolish though. Sick of hearing it from both sides.

The problem is that tolerance on the so called "non woke" side is not reciprocated which leads to lines being drawn in to agree with this ideology for fear of being branded "phobic." I have decided the term "phobic" is basically a bit like calling people other names, I am seriously considering the response of using the term back - are they phobic to biology?

Terfphobic?

@EmotionalSupportHyena
good suggestion

Realityphobic?
Factphobic?
Fairnessphobic?

I like factphobic.

I think all those suggestions sound good thinking about it factphobic or biology phobic sum it up and are quite clear in what they are saying

We won't comply with fascism

From the people whose words and actions are straight out of every nasty authoritarian dictator's play book.

What a bizarre interpretation of what was said, but then you do have form for that.

What it's done for the a certain type of liberal demographic has been utterly life and career changing ! They get to espouse the same rhetoric as the right but without all the unsavoury hangups doing that brings. It has saved countless hours of what would have otherwise been a feat of mental gymnastics to express.

Incredibly bizarre!

This poster has some pretty outdated info/opinions re: the Rights of Women.

International Human Rights started out the same for both sexes, in 1948.

By 1979 it was understood that while universal human rights were working for men, women and girls were still being shat on.

That’s why Women’s Rights (for female people) are in addition to universal Human Rights.

The Suffragettes predate this, so obvs hadn’t realised that equal rights without sex differences acknowledged were not enough to lift women out of oppression.

Bit weird to completely forget the achievements of the Second Wave, especially on a Feminist forum, but then Egg does have a lot of very peculiar takes.

but then Egg does have a lot of very peculiar takes.

Indeed they do.

That said, I think suffragette Flora Drummond had it sussed that when people make a virtue out of pretending sex differences don't exist, it means punishing women for diverging from defaults built around male physiology.

She lost out on her planned career, because she didn't meet a unisex height requirement!

extract from her wikipedia entry
On leaving high-school at the age of fourteen Flora moved to Glasgow to take a business training course at a civil service school where she passed the qualifications to become a post-mistress but standing at 5 feet 1 inch (1.55 m) was refused a post as she did not meet the newly introduced minimum 5 feet 2 inches (1.57 m) height requirement.Although she went on to gain a Society of Arts qualification in shorthand and typing she still carried a resentment about the discrimination which meant that women, because of their smaller average height, were prevented from being postmistresses.

An inch too short to be a post mistress?

I’m angry on her behalf over a hundred years later!

🙄

🙄

Sex differences exist. Social differences constructed on top of sex differences exist.

Some of these are unavoidable because of the different physical capabilities and asymmetrical physical demands of reproduction between men and women.

Some of these are due to society encoding male needs and norms as standard and therefore not accommodating female differences.

Some of these are due to culturally specific constructions of gender on top of sex differences that have nothing whatsoever to do with physical sex but nevertheless inform our self-image and expectations of others based on sex.

The goal of feminism is to eradicate the last two and mitigate the first, so that female people are not constrained by their sex, but are free to explore their physical and mental capabilities and live empowered and safe lives.

None of this will be possible if we cannot speak openly about the experience of being female. We cannot explore and challenge the intersecting constraints of sex, society, culture and gender if we cannot draw a distinction between those of us who are male and those of us who are female.

A word of warning. My lefty Guardian reading brother decided I was unreasonable….not on this but effectively on everything.

So unreasonable that he could not possibly help me care for our parents who were in their 80s and starting to fail…..

Oh screw him, the worst kind of bastard. He's the sort who will show up with a moving truck the second they're gone to steal them blind during the funeral.