A year ago a close family member broke ties with me for being a terf. No fall outs previously.

[BluebellBlueballs]

I'm a little sad, exactly one year ago my brother found out I was gender critical and cut me off completely until I 'renounce my views '
He's not transgender or gay but seems to have accepted a woke moral superiority and called me a nazi and bigot for not including males in my definition of women.

I offered to agree to disagree and have a relationship but not talk about this one issue but he wouldn't accept that. Even for my dad's sake who is in his 80s and wants us to make peace.

I won't 'renounce my views ' at his command so despite my offer to agree to not discuss this one issue, we are now estranged.

What do I do? I have no ill intent towards transgender people but I believe in biological sex based definitions of humans and you cannot change sex. I had 2 very difficult pregnancies a man would never have to experience. I have lost my brother to the woke stasi and don't see a way forward.

I have to accept my brother is no longer in my life don't I?

It's tough!

My youngest son ( 29) thinks I'm the devil incarnate for a variety of reasons, including the fact that I am actively involved in pushing back against gender ideology.

I just have to tolerate it and keep my heart open as much as possible - whilst also protecting myself from the hostility. In time both he and your brother will grow up a bit more and mature enough to realise that life is not so ideologically black and white.

Is your brother younger than you? How old is he?

I'm betting most Mums aren't on twitter as they don't have the time.
WTAF, no, course mums dont do such trivial things as social media, they're far too busy feeding their kids, wiping noses, wearing floral ponies making their husbands tea ready to be on the table when they get home from a hard days graft at work.
Is this the feminism board or have I stumbled across some trad wife /Mummy Martyr parenting forum instead?!
Fuck me.

Think there's something in this, tend to agree

*the suffragettes stated that law should be blind to sex and would have been scandalised at the idea that your rights should depend on what's between your legs.

Well, you don't, obviously. TransMillennial is here to tell you that. Glad that's cleared up.

On a forum absolutely teeming with types of people that represent all the fascist views that have done so much personal damage, and societal damage.

Ime, men like your brother believe that men should always be prioritised over women and love to be able to aggressively put a woman in 'her place.' This whole issue is a dream come true for them.

@TransMillennial You are obfuscating the matter (very common with TRAs).

The suffragettes made the point that they didn’t want to be oppressed BECAUSE of their biology, which exists.

Just as Mary Wollstonecraft said ‘mind has no gender’ - the body is sexed which is a reality but should
not be used to force personality characteristics.

TRAs oppress women and seek to further our oppression every day by eroding our rights and trying to chip away at the reality of our biological lived experience.

I do find this with my own teenager sometimes.

Me 'No, I'm not washing your pants, you're old enough to wash your own laundry now'

Teen: 'Aaaargh this is actual child abuse. You're abusing me'

Me: 'Those words don't mean what you think they mean, go and look them up: here's the washing machine manual, I'm happy to answer any questions. Enabling you to have learning opportunities to become a fully functioning adult is being a good parent. You'll thank me when you leave home'.

Is this you?

I'm here to learn.

Really? It seems you are lashing out

This isn’t Twitter it’s the feminist board of mn

We are not assaulting people to get what we want. Unlike males who are for violence against women as you are.

We are talking about women’s rights first. We don’t ‘hate’ you, we want our own single sex spaces though. And we do hate the violence you bring to the world. It’s ugly male arrogance / patriarchy in action.

I've found the one silver lining of this whole debate is that it's enabled me to remove people who can't apply logic and are misogynists from my life. People who think I'm lesser than them because I'm female and middle-aged. I've removed my unpaid labour from anything involving those people too.

As a busy Mum it's a bit of a time saver.

Almost as good a life hack as frozen chopped onions (which are still my top busy Mum life hack).

*Yes. Gender critical people are dying out. Z, Millennials and Gen Alpha will undo all the damage you're doing to society once you're gone. We won't comply with fascism.

(I love how Helen Joyce's words were perfectly fine aimed at trans people, but as transphobic bigots it's fascism! Waaaaaah! So funny.)*

Nope. My child and all his friends all understand a male cannot become a female and vice versa.

Speaking of which, off to cook lunch for my GC kids.

It's not bigotry to understand someone cannot change their biological sex and that men taking female hormones doesn't strip them of their advantages over women.

Normally I’m in favour of letting these people show themselves up but this person is libelling Helen Joyce with a made up quote.

@TransMillennial Your ideas expose you as a misogynist. That’s all.

You’re not the freedom fighter you think you are - you’re a squalid male rights activist parading yourself around as morally untouchable when in fact you, in your capacity as a TRA, are a gross offshoot of the patriarchy.

Looks like mnhq has deleted the misogynistic posts

Thanks for doing that

Honestly! " We won't comply with fascism" 😉You sound very young. I was like that once - but perhaps with less vitriol. I grew up and gained some life experience, and here we are.

There is actually a generation coming up behind yours which is having none of it. They tend to see it in an ironic way and recognise the narcissism. Each generation rebels against the previous one. Nothing really ever changes. Patterens just repeat themselves.

I mean, the truth sayer has descended into enemy territory to tell us just what fascists we all are, and how we're all complicit with hate out there.

Typical tactics, come on to say some listening might happen, while throwing the insults at us.

Kinda like at Posies NZ meet, Lesbian Project and Speakers Corner, Riley Gaines talk...the TRAs turn up en masse, and then to a man (and occasional woman), lash out.

Luckily there's no physical violence on a forum, just those who want to say the whole world is against them and making their life unbearable.

I don't see any evidence of wanting to listen from your side. Not for the last decade. Not now.

And tbh TransMillennial, GC women are pretty much done with listening as well.

You've had a decade to put your views, engage in debate, and win the argument.

Instead you imposed your views, you chose not to engage in debate, and you're now losing the argument.

And so we expect more lashing out online. And in public.

Your posts are totally consistent with this.

I wouldn't credit that poster with so much political integrity. It's like the young pup biting at the tail of its mother.

@TransMillennial sex is observed not assigned.
My dm was a MW for 30 years, she never thought 'oh we've had 3 males born today I'll assign this baby a female.'

It really seems that there are a large number of men who believe not prioritising them in every situation is hating them.

If sex was assigned not observed there would be a 0% birth rate for females in Afghanistan.

Each generation rebels against the previous one. Nothing really ever changes. Patterens just repeat themselves.

This is true to some extent but women have lost a huge amount of freedom in both Iran and Afghanistan which they previously had. They have lost human rights. And women are losing the ability to rely on the same human rights as men in western countries right now as a result of TRA ideology.

TransMillennial I don't know how you can infer hate from my post. I also doubt whether all the students you are quite sure agree with you, actually do in private. I worry about your fitness to work in education with such aggressive and inflammatory language, 'vengeance' etc.

Lol @TransMillennial you know exactly what sex is which is why you’re on here shouting at women rather than going onto a forum populated mainly be men & telling them off for wrong think

I think this board shows how it really is an impossible situation and one that as a parent is extremely worrying. In the past teenagers have always fought the establishment ie punk, mods, rockers, New Romantics, hippies, etc etc The difference with this fad is that it is also impacting younger children and that they can end up causing damage to their bodies which is irreversible.

Does he know your belief is protected under the Equality Act? Both under ‘Belief’ and under ‘Sex’.

He is unreasonable and you should not be feeling somehow guilty or wrong.

Your only choice is good riddance, or fake it.