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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

Learning-disabled girls & women must accept men providing intimate care

353 replies

MrsOvertonsWindow · 10/07/2022 19:53

This dreadful account from Transgender Trend is no doubt replicated all over the country as schools / social care / the NHS remove the rights to sex based care for these vulnerable young women, allowing men to provide intimate / personal care. Prioritising (yet again) the demands of this toxic lobby insisting that the safety, privacy and rights of women and girls no longer matter.

Warning - contains information about rape / HIV

www.transgendertrend.com/severely-learning-disabled-girl-sex-based-rights-under-threat/

OP posts:
Adelishious · 16/07/2022 05:38

ThinkingaboutLangClegosaurus · 12/07/2022 12:58

This is absolutely essential. Women do not commit an equal number of crimes, especially sex crimes. We are unequal in all minds of ways — pay, opportunities, strength and many more.

The safety of vulnerable people outweighs anyone’s wish for a particular job.

One has little to do with the other. Let's ban men from teaching too if that's the case, it's absurd! Carers who commit sex crimes amongst the vulnerable are a tiny minority and we have good systems for preventing those known to be sex offenders from getting those kind of jobs. This is simply discrimination and I completely disagree that women have the disadvantages mentioned. Women get paid the same as men by law and have just as much if not more opportunities!

headstone · 16/07/2022 06:13

I don’t agree there should be only female carers. I’ve with many excellent male health care workers. It can be quite a heavy job and tbh it’s easier for men with the heavier patients and patients are getting heavier. Patients wishes should be taken on board. We get men who only want female carers too though.

headstone · 16/07/2022 06:17

The other benefit with men joining the care work force is usually that pay and working conditions improve. Sad but true unfortunately so I’m glad more men choose to do this work.

Conflictedunicorn · 16/07/2022 06:45

Adelishious · 16/07/2022 05:38

One has little to do with the other. Let's ban men from teaching too if that's the case, it's absurd! Carers who commit sex crimes amongst the vulnerable are a tiny minority and we have good systems for preventing those known to be sex offenders from getting those kind of jobs. This is simply discrimination and I completely disagree that women have the disadvantages mentioned. Women get paid the same as men by law and have just as much if not more opportunities!

@Adelishious you’ve never heard of the sex pay gap then? Did you know that at Halifax for example, a bank recently lauded for its commitment to ‘pronouns and being equal’, women get paid 27% less than men on average? Did you know women do 95% of childcare and caring for elderly on infirm relatives so find it harder to access the workplace or education opportunities? You’ve seriously never heard of any of this stuff?

334bu · 16/07/2022 06:49

Carers who commit sex crimes amongst the vulnerable are a tiny minority and we have good systems for preventing those known to be sex offenders from getting those kind of jobs. This is simply discrimination and I completely disagree that women have the disadvantages mentioned. Women get paid the same as men by law and have just as much if not more opportunities

Where to start...**

  1. Only a few sex offenders ........let's make it easier to offend.
2.Checks in place........so introduce a system that allows people to change identities.
  1. Equal opportunities and pay for women....🤣🤣
Adelishious · 16/07/2022 07:48

@Conflictedunicorn
Ive heard of it of course but I don't think it's relevant that there's a gap. If it could be said WHY there's a gap, I'd be interested, certainly if there was a large part down to discrimination, but it's not. Pay gap is due to normal differences such as overtime worked, dangerous professions and willingness to travel so hardly something to complain about in my eyes.
And if you're saying we have less opportunities because we're inherently women that can hardly be helped can it? It turns out believe it or not that women usually prefer doing the majority of childcare! Who would have guessed?

Adelishious · 16/07/2022 07:53

@334bu
1.easier to offend.
2.Checks in place........so introduce a system that allows people to change identities.
Equal opportunities and pay for women....🤣🤣

No one can change identity.

Equal opportunities is enshrined in law now so any examples of unfair opportunities should be brought before court surely, same with pay, I'm afraid those arguments don't stand up anymore.

Theeyeballsinthesky · 16/07/2022 08:00

Male care workers can work with men - I mean it’s not as if there’s a shortage of men needing care

”equal opportunities” doesn’t mean that men can go around insisting it’s fine for them to provide intimidate care to women if women don’t want it. The equality act allows for that exemption

I will never cease to be amazed at how saying no to men brings out so many male apologists & wonder where those people are when women are told no as we are repeatedly

Adelishious · 16/07/2022 08:07

I agree they should be allowed, provided they pay the additional costs incurred as a result of needing this. Who else do they think will foot the bill for each and every personal request they decide to want. Should they get the colour bedsheets and specific furniture they want too when there's perfectly good stuff provided already? Same with care, workers should be assumed to be competent regardless of sex.

FrancescaContini · 16/07/2022 08:12

One of the most crushing, despair-inducing threads I’ve ever read here. Thank you so much, @MrsOvertonsWindow for highlighting this.

FrancescaContini · 16/07/2022 08:14

Adelishious · 16/07/2022 05:38

One has little to do with the other. Let's ban men from teaching too if that's the case, it's absurd! Carers who commit sex crimes amongst the vulnerable are a tiny minority and we have good systems for preventing those known to be sex offenders from getting those kind of jobs. This is simply discrimination and I completely disagree that women have the disadvantages mentioned. Women get paid the same as men by law and have just as much if not more opportunities!

Fucksake. What an ignorant post, @Adelishious Blah blah blah TINY MINORITY blah blah blah.

Clearly we don’t have “good systems”. Did you read the OP?

PurgatoryOfPotholes · 16/07/2022 08:46

Adelishious, you're not engaging with the substance of posts, and you're just parroting prelearnt points

For example, you've just cited "dangerous professions" as a reason for an internal pay gap between the sexes in a retail bank. But that is a tangent.

Focus on the thread.

Is it discrimination against men in care roles if they are not allowed to change a mute, learning disabled teenage girl's tampon?

Adelishious · 16/07/2022 08:53

PurgatoryOfPotholes · 16/07/2022 08:46

Adelishious, you're not engaging with the substance of posts, and you're just parroting prelearnt points

For example, you've just cited "dangerous professions" as a reason for an internal pay gap between the sexes in a retail bank. But that is a tangent.

Focus on the thread.

Is it discrimination against men in care roles if they are not allowed to change a mute, learning disabled teenage girl's tampon?

Of course its discrimination, the same as it would be for a female nurse to put a catheter into a disabled boy admitted to hospital. There's no difference, youre just demonising male care workers.

Conflictedunicorn · 16/07/2022 08:54

Adelishious · 16/07/2022 07:53

@334bu
1.easier to offend.
2.Checks in place........so introduce a system that allows people to change identities.
Equal opportunities and pay for women....🤣🤣

No one can change identity.

Equal opportunities is enshrined in law now so any examples of unfair opportunities should be brought before court surely, same with pay, I'm afraid those arguments don't stand up anymore.

No one can change identity 😂😂😂😂😂. @Adelishious what do you mean by this? Do you mean no one can ever change their name on legal documents?

how do you know ‘mosteomen like doing childcare’? Have you asked every single woman? Why are you invested in allowing men to access vulnerable women and girls?

Adelishious · 16/07/2022 08:57

For example, you've just cited "dangerous professions" as a reason for an internal pay gap between the sexes in a retail bank. But that is a tangent.

OK then in banking we know men put in for promotions more than women, work longer hours overtime, ask for psyrises more than women. Theres 3 reasons non of which are discrimatory and relate to banking, plus, like legal profession women tend to drop out part way through for family so miss out career progression. That's not a bad thing for women to be doing.

Conflictedunicorn · 16/07/2022 09:04

So @Adelishious you fine on to a feminist board to tell women that there is no sex pay gap, women prefer doing all the childcare and women are not disadvantaged by their sex? What actual research do you have that backs up these arguments?

Why not address the lack of childcare provision that prevents a lot of women pursuing careers? Why not address the socialisation of girls into ‘soft’ subjects and away from maths and the sciences? Why not address the amount of men why walk away from their families leaving women to pick up the pieces?

DarkMa · 16/07/2022 09:11

Year ago my very elderly Indian mum had a carer turn up at her door to provide personal care. Very glamourous fully made up. My mother's comment to me. Why is there a man in a dress here. Tell him to get out. Cue much flouncing and agressive male shouting I'm a woman.

Mum was having none of it.

Adelishious · 16/07/2022 09:32

@Conflictedunicorn
I am fine as I consider myself a feminist, not all women think alike you know, we have our own brains and opinions, or most should. All the research available backs my way of thinking, and that's not that there is NO gender pay gap, its that the reasons there is a gap aren't worth arguing about. I think its wrong of you to assume that all women WANT to go back to work and not realise what a privilege it is to bring their young families up and have that opportunity while being cared for themselves. Certain feminists think that their goals have been achieved getting equality and would like to see women taking more advantage of that instead of trying to get equality where it isn't needed

TastefulRainbowUnicorn · 16/07/2022 09:40

Cue much flouncing and agressive male shouting I'm a woman.

That’s so disturbing, both that he showed up on the first place and that he shouted at an elderly woman for saying no to him. Your mum sounds like she coped fine, though it’s still awful that she had to deal with that, but suppose it had been a client who had dementia or was otherwise very vulnerable? So disturbing.

MrsOvertonsWindow · 16/07/2022 09:48

FrancescaContini · 16/07/2022 08:12

One of the most crushing, despair-inducing threads I’ve ever read here. Thank you so much, @MrsOvertonsWindow for highlighting this.

It is isn't it? So hard to know what to do when people have so little care for the needs of the most vulnerable in society. Some of the comments are so grim in terms of lack of empathy and understanding of women's rights, I keep thinking I've posted this in AIBU. 😕

OP posts:
ScrollingLeaves · 16/07/2022 11:05

@Adelishious · Today 08:07
I agree they should be allowed, provided they pay the additional costs incurred as a result of needing this. Who else do they think will foot the bill for each and every personal request they decide to want. Should they get the colour bedsheets and specific furniture they want too when there's perfectly good stuff provided already? Same with care, workers should be assumed to be competent regardless of sex.

It is extremely offensive that you equate a woman’s right not to be given intimate care from a man to choosing the colour of bed sheets.

Vulnerable women and girls, and vulnerable children, in general are disproportionately likely to be sexually abused.

Assume! that if an opportunity for secret sexual abuse arises, some man somewhere will try to take advantage of it.

Terfydactyl · 16/07/2022 12:47

It turns out believe it or not that women usually prefer doing the majority of childcare! Who would have guessed
No one would have guessed, mainly because it ain't true. And I would love to know why you think this claptrap.

Conflictedunicorn · 16/07/2022 13:04

Terfydactyl · 16/07/2022 12:47

It turns out believe it or not that women usually prefer doing the majority of childcare! Who would have guessed
No one would have guessed, mainly because it ain't true. And I would love to know why you think this claptrap.

But @Adelishious is a feminist don’t you know so will know these things, despite there not being a shred of proof.

PurgatoryOfPotholes · 16/07/2022 13:39

Adelishious · 16/07/2022 08:53

Of course its discrimination, the same as it would be for a female nurse to put a catheter into a disabled boy admitted to hospital. There's no difference, youre just demonising male care workers.

So, in your view, eliminating discrimination in care means abolishing the most vulnerable patients' boundaries and means telling workers that they are entitled to touch the genitals of young vulnerable children under 18 of the opposite-sex. It means destroying the concept of "patient-centred" care.

It means prioritising the hurt feelings of a male who wants to change tampons over the girl whose genitalia he would be touching.

What if she's not mute, and can actually communicate distress, and says she only wants a woman to do it?

Do disabled women and girls get the right to sy no?

Seeing as you're so against "discrimination", does that mean you have sex with both men and women? You wouldn't want to be sexist, would you?

MrsOvertonsWindow · 16/07/2022 13:44

Pleased to see that the Mail are reporting on JKR's support for the rights of vulnerable girls (and their carers) to have boundaries and to refuse to be intimately touched by random male care workers:

www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-11019997/JK-Rowling-defends-16-year-old-girl-told-women-care-school-toilets.html

OP posts: