Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

Feminism: chat

Original poster

MP comes out as transgender

748 replies

poshme · 30/03/2022 09:25

A male Tory MP has released a statement on Twitter that they are transgender, and also that a couple of years ago they were raped.
It's a brave statement.

MP comes out as transgender
OP posts:
Thread gallery
7
Theeyeballsinthefuckingsky · 30/03/2022 21:45

@DrSbaitso

Rape does not have to be "forced" to be non consensual. The trauma of one victim does not erode the trauma of another who experienced a different type of attack. It's not a zero sum game. The insistence that all rape must be forcible stranger rape, which is relatively uncommon, or else it's not "real" is one enormous reason why rapists get away with it: because so many people think it's not real rape, or not traumatising.
This 👆🏻 With bells on
MedusasBadHairDay · 30/03/2022 21:48

Usually is there's rape myths being spouted on FWR it's an MRA troll. What is going on?!

CarbonelCat · 30/03/2022 21:48

Don't be ridiculous Maskless. He hasn't 'got me.'

As I posted earlier in the thread, I'm appalled by what I've learned about his past, outraged that you can be dismissed for non attendance in a public office and then still stand for parliament! I'm revolted by his involvement in sleazy websites and incensed at how he has not been held responsible for dodgy dealings.

However, it changes nothing about his right to describe what happened to him and have it recognised for what it was. Rape is rape, defined in law and I have absolutely no time for a hierarchy of rape situations, nor victim blaming.

GCAcademic · 30/03/2022 21:48

I'm saving my concern for all the girls raped by the men who he recruited through his sugar daddy business. How many rapes/girls is currently not even on anyone's radar

But according to some of the posters on here, those girls would have sought out those encounters so aren’t actually rape victims.

KatsuKatsu · 30/03/2022 21:49

@DrSbaitso

Rape does not have to be "forced" to be non consensual. The trauma of one victim does not erode the trauma of another who experienced a different type of attack. It's not a zero sum game. The insistence that all rape must be forcible stranger rape, which is relatively uncommon, or else it's not "real" is one enormous reason why rapists get away with it: because so many people think it's not real rape, or not traumatising.
Thank you
AlisonDonut · 30/03/2022 21:50

@GCAcademic

I'm saving my concern for all the girls raped by the men who he recruited through his sugar daddy business. How many rapes/girls is currently not even on anyone's radar

But according to some of the posters on here, those girls would have sought out those encounters so aren’t actually rape victims.

He sought out this enounter though right? So...
multivac · 30/03/2022 21:50

@Swayingpalmtrees

Keir now has to deal with a pimp that runs a sugar daddy website as an MP, that was also involved in a hit and run accident and now announcing he 'thinks' he might be trans and nails the Labour Leader's colours to the mast with this opening:

He is said to have opened a speech by saying: ‘Good evening ladies and gentleman, or as Keir Starmer would put it, people who are assigned female or male at birth.’

That was Johnson's 'joke' at his 'let's get everyone back onside' fancy piss up last night. Bit different from his support of Wallis in PMQ today...
happydappy2 · 30/03/2022 21:51

At this stage, there is allegation of rape, no defendant in court giving their account of what happened, no guilty verdict.

Signalbox · 30/03/2022 21:56

@MedusasBadHairDay

Usually is there's rape myths being spouted on FWR it's an MRA troll. What is going on?!
I think MRA troll is about right.
DrSbaitso · 30/03/2022 21:57

@happydappy2

At this stage, there is allegation of rape, no defendant in court giving their account of what happened, no guilty verdict.
So now you're deciding it didn't happen at all?
happydappy2 · 30/03/2022 21:57

And I’ll try and write more eloquently my deleted post.

Can a person have consensual sex, then in hindsight say they were raped because partner was not wearing a condom and they did not consent to that?

Surely there is a difference between that category of rape, and completely non consensual sex between 2 people at the outset?

happydappy2 · 30/03/2022 21:59

DrSbaitso I’m not deciding anything, just laying out the facts.

DrSbaitso · 30/03/2022 22:00

Can a person have consensual sex, then in hindsight say they were raped because partner was not wearing a condom and they did not consent to that?

No, because if they didn't consent to unprotected sex then they never consented in the first place.

Surely there is a difference between that category of rape, and completely non consensual sex between 2 people at the outset?

Why, which category of rape do you think is acceptable?

They are both non consensual and it's creepy and disturbing that you don't see that.

Signalbox · 30/03/2022 22:02

@happydappy2

And I’ll try and write more eloquently my deleted post.

Can a person have consensual sex, then in hindsight say they were raped because partner was not wearing a condom and they did not consent to that?

Surely there is a difference between that category of rape, and completely non consensual sex between 2 people at the outset?

Look up "stealthing" or "conditional consent"

www.kingsleynapley.co.uk/insights/blogs/criminal-law-blog/stealthing-conviction-brings-conditional-consent-out-in-the-open

DrSbaitso · 30/03/2022 22:02

@happydappy2

DrSbaitso I’m not deciding anything, just laying out the facts.
At first you tried to insinuate that it's not rape if a person merely didn't consent to no condom, and now you're trying to insinuate that it didn't happen at all. Most rape cases never get to court, there's another fact for you to lay out for us. Largely because of people like you who trivialise and then flat out deny it. You have nothing to contribute.
sacredfeminina · 30/03/2022 22:03

I havent"t read the giant thread, but what comes to mind for me is how you have someone like JKR who posts a well thought out, compassionate essay discussing the need to respect multiple rights, in which she mentions abuse she has faced. She gets hounded, told she is identifying as a victim, blah blah. She has not one black mark against her name, is a huge philanthropist.

Then here you have an apparently dodgy mp, who has run sugar daddy websites (which basically sell power dynamics/abuse as a product), a hit and run (am i right in understanding this?!) And other dodgy business dealings, and he mentions his sexual abuse to a sea of unwaivering support.

Just feels a bit unbalanced. Or like women are expected to be abused so it's worse when it happens to men.

Also that everyone is talking about how brave and special and vulnerable he is being 'trans', yet completely ignore his dodgy past. Trans seems to be some elite untouchable people who can do no wrong doing... Like priests were. There should be no unscrutinisable class of people

GCAcademic · 30/03/2022 22:05

He sought out this enounter though right? So...

He sought out an encounter involving protected sex, not sex without a condom. So the sex wasn’t consensual. In law, there is a term for unconsensual sex.

sacredfeminina · 30/03/2022 22:06

Another point - he has a wife and kids. What makes him dysphoric trans, and not a crossdresser wishing to take his fetish further? How does anyone know?

Tabasco007 · 30/03/2022 22:07

@AlisonDonut

Sleazy man comes out as Trans. This never happens!

I am shook. To my core.

I can't help but feel this way too....
JacquelineCarlyle · 30/03/2022 22:08

@springtimeishereagain

Hmm, another man coming out as trans and then we find out he's been involved with sleaze. Sticking to the script so far.
Indeed Angry
happydappy2 · 30/03/2022 22:09

drwhatever I have plenty to contribute

You can’t stop me speaking. It might have happened, it might not, we don’t know. only 2 people know for sure. I have a funny feeling a lot more will come to light very soon though.

Tabasco007 · 30/03/2022 22:13

@sacredfeminina

Another point - he has a wife and kids. What makes him dysphoric trans, and not a crossdresser wishing to take his fetish further? How does anyone know?
As someone was blackmailing him with photos, I can only imagine those photos were of him 'cross dressing and sexual' (unless that's just me who thinks that)! so it seems we are celebrating a classic case of a fetish/cross dresser person, 3 letters come to mind... oh, and someone who drove off from the scene or a crime and made money out of a dodgy website!
Sittinginthesand · 30/03/2022 22:15

He has a wife and kids Shock no apology to them though.

CarbonelCat · 30/03/2022 22:16

Has he got a wife and kids?! Poor them

lifeturnsonadime · 30/03/2022 22:18

Oh for goodness sake, arguing amongst ourselves as to whether his rape claim is valid is ridiculous. If he didn't consent to sex without a condom and that is what happened it is rape. That's abhorrent.

The argument about what his declaration of being trans means is completely separate.

It does nothing to for that argument to claim that he wasn't raped because it doesn't meet your criteria for it.