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Feminism: Sex & gender discussions

Are you going to come out on Gender Critical Coming Out Day 19 December?

175 replies

MacNTosh · 09/11/2021 15:24

I’ve just read Glinner’s latest email about CG coming out day planned for 19th December. I think it’s a fantastic idea, I really want to do it, but I’m scared. Partly due to online backlash and partly because I don’t want to cause a rift with my dcs. What about everyone?

gendercriticalcomingoutday.org/

OP posts:
sharksarecool · 10/11/2021 19:30

I think it would be better to initially have a day where you just do something like wear a suffragette ribbon or adult human female badge on a particular day. That way all the GC people at work could clock each other and realise they're not alone. That would embolden people to challenge things in their workplace, if they know that at frw other women agree with them. It would also enable us to organise ourselves IRL which is probably more powerful and effective than with strangers over the internet.

goodwinter · 10/11/2021 19:33

I'm bisexual and the idea of "coming out" as gender critical doesn't sit right with me at all. Just the terminology of it.

oldwomanwhoruns · 11/11/2021 08:33

We as GC are not exapropriating the 'coming out' terminology.

The phrase originally referred to the 'Coming Out' of debutantes, ie young ladies, who were then presented at Court, and Did the Season, ie all the dances etc in London. Looking for an eligible husband.

The phrase was nicked by the gay movement, presumably ironically?

We are merely nicking it back.

SirChenjins · 11/11/2021 08:41

Awful that the majority have been silenced to such an extent by the TA that 'coming out' and reclaiming what is biologically correct is something that's even having to be mooted - but yes, I'll definitely do something. Fortunately this madness hasn't reached my workplace (yet - I'm surprised Sturgeon hasn't made it mandatory (in Gaelic, natch)) so my job is safe.

SirChenjins · 11/11/2021 08:57

*this pronoun madness

PandorasMailbox · 11/11/2021 09:03

@IsadoraQuagmire

I just read Glinner's email too. Everyone who knows me, even slightly, knows ALL about my GC views, so have never been "In". I've peaked dozens and dozens of people...

Me too. I've pissed off a few people, but others were visibly relieved that they weren't alone in feeling the way they do. Swings and roundabouts Smile
MyButteredBread · 11/11/2021 10:07

@oldwomanwhoruns

We as GC are not exapropriating the 'coming out' terminology.

The phrase originally referred to the 'Coming Out' of debutantes, ie young ladies, who were then presented at Court, and Did the Season, ie all the dances etc in London. Looking for an eligible husband.

The phrase was nicked by the gay movement, presumably ironically?

We are merely nicking it back.

It refers to coming out of the closet, ie, no longer hiding being homosexual. The way straight people don't have to hide their heterosexuality.
lazylinguist · 11/11/2021 12:28

I'm bisexual and the idea of "coming out" as gender critical doesn't sit right with me at all. Just the terminology of it.

I'd say it was pretty appropriate in this situation, since it is being used to refer to openly stating something about yourself/your views or beliefs which you've thus far been scared to reveal, for fear of being sacked, insulted, harrassed or ostracised.

PatsArrow · 11/11/2021 13:44

Glinner explains this more on this weeks TMWI. Pretty near the start.



It's not 'his' thing, he explains this. No-one is pressurising anyone to do anything they don't want. If you're already 'open' then great.

I'm just thinking of small things I can do without jeopardising my freelance career in the creative industries. I'm thinking small, but there's things I can do.

I think they really is something in the idea that we think everyone else is all in on the Gender Ideology. I think the truth probably is that even close friends have been dancing around each other not realising that they think the same way.
Tesla73 · 12/11/2021 13:03
Pigeontown · 12/11/2021 13:20

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Bosky · 12/11/2021 14:16

@Journeyofthedragons "I think it's Graham Lineham, James HumanGayMale, Karen Actually, Jen Baker and Helen Staniland who are organising this."

I've heard of the others but who is Jen Baker?

Someone in another post also mentioned that Sarah Phillimore is involved.

It would have helped inspire confidence if the site/campaign organisers had not been anonymous at the outset but it seems that some of them who can be public are going to have their names included so that will help.

If it is a "decentralised" day of action maybe it has also been been the product of a network of loosely-related individual enthusiasts rather than a coordinated action? That might account for the site being launched and publicised without sufficient attention to the need to inspire trust and confidence?

The "Coming Out" name is unfortunate because that's not what it is going to be about for a lot of people who intend to participate. This seems a very different initiative to the one just after Magdalen Berns died, when there was a call for anyone who could risk it to "be brave" and stop being anonymous on social media. That doesn't seem to be what this is about, unless that's what people want to do on Dec 19th.

It seems counterproductive to quibble about details though. It's out there now and it's up to anyone who wants to take part to make the most of it, individually or collectively. It reminds me of the campaigns to do "ribboning" on a specific day, the Scottish "voting with our feet" shoes outside Holyrood.

If anyone was thinking of doing a real-life event or action some time soon then Dec 19th would be a good time because it would increase the chance of local and national press coverage. In fact, letters to local press, call ins to local radio stations, interviews, etc. could be actions for Dec 19th.

There is a bit more solidarity for campaigners and excitement or relevance for the press when a small action is part of a larger enterprise.

Bosky · 12/11/2021 14:18

ps. I'm trying out the Mumsnet Mobile app for the first time and haven't worked out how to Preview a post before publishing, so apologies for any typos!

Journeyofthedragons · 12/11/2021 14:37

@bosky Graham Linehan is the one who has come up with the idea with a couple of other people who wish to remain anonymous - the others are just public supporting the event - I'm not sure who Jen Baker is.

Journeyofthedragons · 12/11/2021 14:37

*publicly

malloo · 12/11/2021 14:39

Hmm, I'm a bit on the fence on this one. My first thought was whether LGB people would find it a bit offensive, using terminology that is very specific to their experiences? I don't know. And also that it might be a bit rubbish if the only people able to do it are the ones who are already out? I think maybe a 'gender critical day of solidarity' might have been better, where everyone agrees to do one thing, whether that's tiny or big. Speak up within you family, offer someone a Tunnocks teacake, write a letter, wear a t-shirt etc etc. And post about it online, with photo, anonymous or not, and with a rough location to show we are everywhere.

Bosky · 12/11/2021 15:04

@malloo

Hmm, I'm a bit on the fence on this one. My first thought was whether LGB people would find it a bit offensive, using terminology that is very specific to their experiences? I don't know. And also that it might be a bit rubbish if the only people able to do it are the ones who are already out? I think maybe a 'gender critical day of solidarity' might have been better, where everyone agrees to do one thing, whether that's tiny or big. Speak up within you family, offer someone a Tunnocks teacake, write a letter, wear a t-shirt etc etc. And post about it online, with photo, anonymous or not, and with a rough location to show we are everywhere.

From looking at the description on the website and watching the video posted above, what you have suggested seems to be exactly what the day is about. Your suggestion of a name for it is IMHO a much better summing up of the intention than “Coming Out Day”.

Plenty of LGBT people have said they are OK about the name but that doesn’t stop it being misleading.

“Gender Critical Day of Solidarity” -perfect! ❤️
NecessaryScene · 12/11/2021 15:27

There was a previous "coming out" wave at the end of 2019, when Emma Hilton (FondOfBeetles) and others went public for the first time.

twitter.com/FondOfBeetles/status/1458173829398814721

I think that did help the whole movement step up a gear.

Maya Forstater has previously talked about "levelling up" at key moments:

twitter.com/MForstater/status/1270810543419527168

That "levelling up" concept is great, I think.

Are you going to come out on Gender Critical Coming Out Day 19 December?
Are you going to come out on Gender Critical Coming Out Day 19 December?
Are you going to come out on Gender Critical Coming Out Day 19 December?
NoNotMeNoSiree · 12/11/2021 15:54

offer someone a tunnocks teacake
Er, yeah but unless you plan on sitting them down for a talk with their tea and tunnocks (at which point they might back away thinking I only wanted a bit of cake, WTF)
they'll just be having tea and cake and none the wiser lol

NotThatHomer · 12/11/2021 15:57

Unfortunately not. I have teen relatives who are trans and my teenage child would be bullied, if I took stand on this. Her year is so, so TWAWSad.
I have carefully broached the subject with some people I know and I've been pleasantly surprised that they agree with me. Apart from one, a married lesbian, which made me despair a bit.

Deadringer · 12/11/2021 16:02

I am openly GC in real life, but i don't think i would "come out' on social media as it be such a cess pit.

ShowOfHands · 12/11/2021 16:12

I can't. My work have just signed up to become Stonewall Diversity Champions, introduced mandatory training on inclusion, a new trans policy, gender neutral toilets and a commitment to disciplining staff who commit micro aggressions. I can't risk my job.

My friends know and a couple of colleagues. I try and talk about it anonymously. It's bloody hard.

TofuDelights · 12/11/2021 16:24

I think Jen may be the moderator on Graham's TMWI podcasts, not 100% sure of that though!

PeriChristmas · 12/11/2021 20:04

@ShowOfHands

I can't. My work have just signed up to become Stonewall Diversity Champions, introduced mandatory training on inclusion, a new trans policy, gender neutral toilets and a commitment to disciplining staff who commit micro aggressions. I can't risk my job.

My friends know and a couple of colleagues. I try and talk about it anonymously. It's bloody hard.

Jeezus. What a ridiculous world we live in! 🙈
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