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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

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Original poster

Dh peaked last night…

230 replies

WhatsAppening · 27/08/2021 07:31

And by ‘peaked’ I mean my usually mild mannered don’t rock the boat just be kind oh mums going on about that trans stuff again ABSOLUTELY LOST HIS SHIT at 17yo DD telling him ‘super straight’ is transphobic as fuck.

I’ve never heard him swear as much as he did at DD telling him ladycock is a thing. He’s not remotely homophobic but being told he should theoretically accept ladycock into his sex life was a tipping point.

He gets it now.

OP posts:
GlinnerForPM · 27/08/2021 08:50

@Happymum12345

I think when normally calm, balanced and well mannered people react like your dh did, it has more impact than usual shouty, argumentative people.
Exactly. I'm sure this had some impact.

OP, glad your DH gets it now.

IWantT0BreakFree · 27/08/2021 08:55

@OperationDessertStorm

Good for him standing up for his sexuality and everyone elses! It is protected in law. Much better that dd learns this now from her parents.

I’m willing to bet if a gay dad had been goaded into shouting about his sexuality there would be no complaints on here.

Nobody has an issue with the point he is making. Some posters have an issue with a grown man shouting and swearing at a teenage girl. Whether he is gay or straight has nothing to do with that whatsoever.
RufustheBadgeringReindeer · 27/08/2021 09:02

I can’t see where he was shouting and she literally started it with the swearing

Children are not allowed to swear in my house

cultkid · 27/08/2021 09:03

Good for him I'm sick of woke teenagers
You can't say anything any more they are the very definition of humble pious!

RufustheBadgeringReindeer · 27/08/2021 09:05

Wait a minute thats not strictly true…they aren’t allowed to swear in front of me ….wherever we are

Ive no idea what they do when im not around…but im very confident they all swear like troopers when i can’t hear then

YetAnotherSpartacus · 27/08/2021 09:09

Is the DH planning on sleeping around? Admittedly I'm sluggish today but I don't get it.

Original poster
WhatsAppening · 27/08/2021 09:43

DD is a blue haired ‘queer’. Her heterosexual life partner was with her Hmm. The conversation started because she said they were in a queer relationship (because they’re both nonbinary, she’s a she/they) and I lost my rag a bit because a)I hate that word and b)what the fuck are you on about. She said she’s pan which includes all genders, being bisexual is transphobic. DH said, well I’m straight and I laughed and said, #superstraight, he googled and said yep that’s me and DD started going off about him being transphobic (just like mum is).

Tempers were lost. There was a discussion amidst the shouting but I doubt much ground was made on her side.

I am very worried about her in all respects, she’s not in college or work, has a ton of stick and poke (prison tats) tattoos, is generally not nice to us. We were having a rare nice evening together until that point.

OP posts:
DillonPanthersTexas · 27/08/2021 09:55

DD is a blue haired ‘queer’. Her heterosexual life partner was with her hmm. The conversation started because she said they were in a queer relationship (because they’re both nonbinary, she’s a she/they) and I lost my rag a bit because a)I hate that word and b)what the fuck are you on about. She said she’s pan which includes all genders, being bisexual is transphobic

My head hurts

Franca123 · 27/08/2021 10:03

My parents would have kicked me out for this nonsense. Cruel to be kind parenting. And my Dad certainly would loose his temper if I tried to tell him he should try 'lady dick'. But I was born in the 80s. Things were evidently very different then. In all seriousness, this is a tough situation OP. Good luck.

Knittingupastorm · 27/08/2021 10:12

She said she’s pan which includes all genders, being bisexual is transphobic

Bisexuality is transphobic? Is this a common view? And people still maintain that LGBT groups can cater for all (L+G+B+T)?

Jaysmith71 · 27/08/2021 10:16

Sounds a bit Peter Pan to me:

Tinkerbelle will die unless you all say aloud that you believe in her. ...Them. ...Whatever.

InspiralCoalescenceRingdown · 27/08/2021 10:19

Bisexuality is transphobic? Is this a common view? And people still maintain that LGBT groups can cater for all (L+G+B+T)?

Well, I couldn't say how common a view it is, but it isn't especially rare amongst TRAs.

Here's some Magdalen Berns.

stepupandbecounted · 27/08/2021 10:21

The whole situation sounds very challenging op.

Original poster
WhatsAppening · 27/08/2021 10:24

I had a similar conversation with DS several months ago, I had a thread about it at the time, one of the only times I’ve ever really rowed with him.

Since then he’s split up from the non binary girlfriend and has worked full time in a pub over the summer. Working with adults and the public seems to have had an effect, he’s no longer militant about TWAW and thinks NB is narcissistic bollocks.

I hope DD has a similar awakening. Sadly (and I don’t say this lightly) I think it will be when she gets pregnant and is left literally holding the baby. She’s not on any hormonal contraception and is adamant they use condoms every single time. Short of dragging her by her hair to get the injection I’m at a loss.

Ugh I’m derailing my own thread. I’m just lost with her right now.

OP posts:
Ionlydomassiveones · 27/08/2021 10:31

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn at the poster's request.

DillonPanthersTexas · 27/08/2021 10:34

Working with adults and the public seems to have had an effect, he’s no longer militant about TWAW and thinks NB is narcissistic bollocks.

It's amazing when they climb out of their silo and meet the real world.

somethinginoffensive · 27/08/2021 10:34

Aw bless, your daughter is in a straight relationship but that's not interesting enough so she must label it queer. Hopefully as a couple they are being consistent with the condom use.

ThanksIGotItInMorrisons · 27/08/2021 10:38

I’m so sick of this absolute tripe. I really do fear for the next generation. You cannot ram your beliefs down others throats. Such wokery. It’s bloody exhausting and frustrating and I understand why your dh lost his shit and snapped and farted.

Ceto · 27/08/2021 10:40

I doubt reason would have had any effect - 17 year olds with a bee in their bonnet are not reasonable

And shouting and swearing are going to make the 17 year old say "Oh, yes, of course you must be right"? Come off it.

Original poster
WhatsAppening · 27/08/2021 10:49

@ceto have you ever met a 17yo with an axe to grind? She was vile to him. She called him a transphobic shit, how dare you exclude TW from your preference, that’s revolting, you’re just as bad as mum (I am very vocal about this nonsense when she starts).

He told her he wasn’t interested in cock no matter who its attached to and she can fuck right off with that. And then she said well women can have cocks too. And he got a bit shouty about magical thinking and privileged beliefs.

I defy anyone not to lose their rag when being told they are are bigoted pieces of shit.

OP posts:
Datun · 27/08/2021 10:51

Sounds like a tricky parent/teen relationship has just been given added weaponry.

It was no mistake getting transgenderism into schools and universities. The Denton report shows exactly how deliberate it is.

Kids always want to kick off at their parents, and something like this, which is going mainstream, is a gift.

Who would have thought that criticising gay liberation/rights would be the way to do it though.

I can imagine it being incredibly galling that people of an age who understand quite how difficult gay rights were to achieve, and what gay people had to suffer prior, being absolutely fuming over the next generation who know so little of it they gleefully use it as a tool to rebel and nothing more.

Datun · 27/08/2021 10:53

And, OP, I realise that it was about being straight, but it's gay people who are getting it in the neck. Maybe take that angle with your DD.

Surely, somewhere, it's still frowned on to be homophobic.

Soontobe60 · 27/08/2021 10:59

Who’s funding her lifestyle at the moment? I bet she’s more than happy to have her phone, internet access, blue hair dye and all the other things you provide paid for out of her transphobic parent’s income.
If my child behaved this way to me, the income source would stop, she’d be told in no uncertain terms that she would have to be respectful of my different viewpoint, as I would be of hers, and that if she didn’t like it she can always go and shack up with her boyfriend. She’s acting like a brat!

Scrapper142 · 27/08/2021 11:05

Surely if you and your husband are such terrible bigots she doesn't/wouldn't want you funding her life. But I'm guessing she's happy to take mummy and daddy's money when she needs it, isn't starving and has a roof over her head.

Does she also identify as workshy? Maybe harsh but she is privileged and I'd find it hard not to point that out to her.

Original poster
WhatsAppening · 27/08/2021 11:09

Grin ‘identify as workshy’ you have no idea how accurate that is.

When she got sacked from her apprenticeship (for doing precisely zero of the assignments set in two months; just literally no work turned in at all) she actually said to me

‘Well I told them I had motivation issues’

OP posts:
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