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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

Feminism: chat

Original poster

Collective Noun

86 replies

MyIronLung46 · 19/07/2021 23:23

Hi all

I would like an opinion on something before I broach the subject IRL.

I am male, I coach a 'Girls' team in what used to be a very male orientated sport. The players are teens or pre-teen.
A couple of the players identify as non-binary, and I have been told that they prefer not to be referred to as a girl.
As a coach, I am struggling to find an appropriate name when working with the group. Normally I would say 'Girls, can you please....' I also teach mixed sex teams of younger kids, and use the term 'guys', but I am concerned that 'guys' can be seen as a male orientated name (think Guys and Dolls).

Suggestions would be appreciated....

OP posts:
SilverOak · 19/07/2021 23:25

It’s not the 1950s, Guys is not a male oriented term. You could always refer to them as children, since that’s what they are. Or people could just get over the fact that when you join a girls team you’re likely to hear the word “girls” used a lot.

GingerAndTheBiscuits · 19/07/2021 23:27

“Everybody, can you…”

CiaoForNiao · 19/07/2021 23:27

"Team"
"Kids"
"Children"

Or guys is fine imo.

EastWestWhosBest · 19/07/2021 23:27

Could you use ‘team’? Like a teacher might say ‘year 6’.

MrsTerryPratchett · 19/07/2021 23:30

Everyone? Everybody? Whatever the team name is? I like peeps, personally.

CiaoForNiao · 19/07/2021 23:31

Or ask them what they would like to be referred to as.

Original poster
MyIronLung46 · 19/07/2021 23:31

Yes, the fact that its established as a girls team holds a lot of weight....

OP posts:
Original poster
MyIronLung46 · 19/07/2021 23:33

@CiaoForNiao

Or ask them what they would like to be referred to as.
Yes, thats my plan, but I want to have a good few sensible options ready, not to steer the opinion, but to give as considered options.
OP posts:
EishetChayil · 19/07/2021 23:33

Tell them not to be so bloody daft.

BlackeyedSusan · 19/07/2021 23:34

kids

whatever it is needs to be as easy to say as girls otherwise one tends to uyse the easy option.

334bu · 19/07/2021 23:34

Nothing wrong with team or folks.
You could also use the Glaswegian " hey yous!"

LooksGood · 19/07/2021 23:35

People?

That's what half our teachers used to say (in an all-girls school). Shift from girls to guys, even with guys now having a neutral secondary meaning, feels like a 180° shift.

ErrolTheDragon · 19/07/2021 23:35

@CiaoForNiao

Or ask them what they would like to be referred to as.
Obviously ask all of them, not just the ones who don't like to be called girls.

I've worked with Americans so long I'm used to using 'guys' as a neutral collective term, but there are certainly women - and quite possibly some girls - who object to it because it's one of those 'male as default' terms.

Original poster
MyIronLung46 · 19/07/2021 23:36

@SilverOak

It’s not the 1950s, Guys is not a male oriented term. You could always refer to them as children, since that’s what they are. Or people could just get over the fact that when you join a girls team you’re likely to hear the word “girls” used a lot.
'Guys' was a preferred option for me, bit digging around the net tonight shows that its not an accepted term for some!
OP posts:
UnWilly · 19/07/2021 23:38

Guys does feel a bit default male term being applied to a mixed sex group to me.

( I saw on a thread here a few weeks ago someone make the point that if you asked a straight man how many guys he had slept with, it wouldn't include women then)

ErrolTheDragon · 19/07/2021 23:39

There might be some 'non binaries' who don't like 'guys' either if they interpret it as male rather than their preferred neutral.Confused

CrazyNeighbour · 19/07/2021 23:39

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

TheSkatesOfCoachBombay · 19/07/2021 23:42

Back in the 90's I had a coach that would collectively refer to us as "tiny people" she was Russian bless her and I think had gotten something mixed up in translation.

Or she would scream "you! No you!" Across an ice rink and you all had to turn around to figure out who was "you".

In your position of opt for "team"

So

Hi team
Come along team
Listen up team

And so on.

therocinante · 19/07/2021 23:42

Hi everyone
Hi everybody
Hi team
Hi friends
Hi gang
Hi "Team Name" (e.g. if you're the Skegness Seagulls football team, "Okay Seagulls let's get ready").

Everyone/body and team would cover the bulk I'd imagine. I'd also add that its goodnthat you're listening to the children in your care and allowing them to decide how they'd like to be referred to - they will really appreciate that.

Original poster
MyIronLung46 · 19/07/2021 23:48

@therocinante

Hi everyone Hi everybody Hi team Hi friends Hi gang Hi "Team Name" (e.g. if you're the Skegness Seagulls football team, "Okay Seagulls let's get ready").

Everyone/body and team would cover the bulk I'd imagine. I'd also add that its goodnthat you're listening to the children in your care and allowing them to decide how they'd like to be referred to - they will really appreciate that.

Thank you.
OP posts:
NiceGerbil · 19/07/2021 23:51

Team is fine

IvyTwines2 · 19/07/2021 23:53

I hate the trend for using 'guys' for a mixed sex group, and think the rise of that along with 'lads' in internet discourse on Tumblr, Twitter etc. has added to the messages young girls are being fed that male is the default, that being thought of as an honorary male is flattering and a step up from being a girl or woman (second class human).

CiaoForNiao · 20/07/2021 00:02

When I said ask "them" I meant the whole team. Not just the NB ones.

Hopeishere52 · 20/07/2021 00:06

I think you should decide , as someone said asking the team could be decisive. I would possibly say girls, everyone….I don’t think you should drop the term girls but could just add on Players, team, everyone. It’s been a challenge at times to get girls involved in sport and it’s important to encourage and reinforce that they are valued as girls….however if you feel you need something for those who don’t like being referred to as girls maybe you could add on a more generic label. Being inclusive should not necessarily mean removing the label that other players are happy with.

Megasausagehead · 20/07/2021 00:31

People..