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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

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Original poster

What's wrong with 'Cisgender'

999 replies

ASugar · 04/03/2021 15:49

As someone who identifies as a cisgender woman and works in sexual health, I am honestly confused as to why so many females (sex term) who identify with being women (gender term) dislike the term Cisgender?

Now I'm not here to tell you what to say, I am genuinely curious.

However, here is my opinion for those who may be interested.

Cisgender just means you are not transgender. That your sex links you your gender and you assign any gender terms (ie. Pronouns, Gender identity, sometimes gender expression but not always, etc). I personally don't like to think that just because I was born with a vagina means I am a woman because I know many men with vaginas and women with penises. Additionally those who don't have a gender identity, then that would mean you wouldn't use women and men as they're gender terms (according to medical professionals). It would make you non binary or agender.

I understand that the term 'Cis' has been used to insult others which for that I am sorry.
My view is that if you can't allow trans women to be accepted in society and identified as women (without the need for 'trans' infront of it constantly) then we should be using cisgender. It is a medical term that professionals such as the NHS recognize. But I understand that is just my opinion.

I probably won't be commenting as I can imagine this will be filled with comments and I don't want to disrespect anyone's views. Just a cisgender woman who wants to understand more...

And as always I would appreciate if you respect my view as I'm going to be respecting all of yours.

OP posts:
Erkrie · 04/03/2021 20:47

Genuinely wrong thread

I liked it so much I'd thought I'd steal it for the future. Grin

ArabellaScott · 04/03/2021 20:47

Attention from a 'news' paper? For what?! Tomorrow's headlines:

DOZENS OF WOMEN POLITELY DECLINE TO BE CALLED 'CIS'
TWITTER RAGES ON

RootyT00t · 04/03/2021 20:48

Yep, I really don't get it either. I find it outstanding that using that term on here can earn you a strike but veiled attacks on transwomen doesn't.

Delphinium20 · 04/03/2021 20:48

@SilverBirchWithout Thanks

ChewtonRoad · 04/03/2021 20:48

Haven't RTFT.

What's wrong with Cisgender? Everything. It's demeaning and must never be used to describe me or any other natal woman.

as I'm going to be respecting all of your [views]. Thanks. With that, my view is that you never again use the revolting prefix c*s when speaking of women.

For the avoidance of doubt, women are adult human females, as you don't seem to have quite grasped that yet.

GettingUntrapped · 04/03/2021 20:49

@ delphinium 20

Well said, more clarity on this situation that we never knew we would need to clarify.

Cokie3 · 04/03/2021 20:49

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Strikemepink · 04/03/2021 20:52

Cokie3 imagine how hard it is though when it’s not just your own personal beliefs but you’ve actually got a sibling involved in this, it would be so hard to turn around and say you know what, maybe we’re wrong... because it would be horrible to realise that your sibling has put themselves through this for nothing.

RootyT00t · 04/03/2021 20:52

@ChewtonRoad

Haven't RTFT.

What's wrong with Cisgender? Everything. It's demeaning and must never be used to describe me or any other natal woman.

as I'm going to be respecting all of your [views]. Thanks. With that, my view is that you never again use the revolting prefix c*s when speaking of women.

For the avoidance of doubt, women are adult human females, as you don't seem to have quite grasped that yet.

You can ask for it not to be used for you but you can't really dictate that it's never used for any biological woman.
RootyT00t · 04/03/2021 20:53

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Quotes deleted post

RootyT00t · 04/03/2021 20:54

@SheldonesqueIsUnwell

Sorry. Wrong thread.
Sheldon 😭😭😭😭😭
WanderinWomb · 04/03/2021 20:54

@Erkrie

I see op is inviting a pile on from twitter. That ok with you *@MNHQ*?
Of course it is.

MN twitter invited these bad faith threads last night, that why I think and deletions at mo shouldn't count as strikes. We were offered up.

Because they were accused of being a transphobic hell site, were sort of obliged to say "not at all, everyone is free to start a thread" They didn't have to answer so many, they've never interacted with me or anyone I know, but when TRAs appear they give them a lot of attention.

Since they didn't have much choice though so can forgive the MN twitter account, I just hope they forgive us. The intent was to have as many deleted as possible, it worked.

Erkrie · 04/03/2021 20:55

imagine how hard it is though when it’s not just your own personal beliefs but you’ve actually got a sibling involved in this, it would be so hard to turn around and say you know what, maybe we’re wrong.

I think it's possible to do both. Support the sister, even if one doesn't believe in that stuff, and be respectful to others beliefs as well.

strudsespark · 04/03/2021 20:55

I usually don't read the feminist board, but was goaded here by the cis headline.

Can anyone explain why posters are being banned for this thread, if the op isn't being banned for being goady and advertising this on Twitter?

vimtosogood · 04/03/2021 20:55

Good luck to her with her 600 followers. Her normal posts barely get a like it reply.

prrtnyao · 04/03/2021 20:56

@RootyT00t

You can ask for it not to be used for you but you can't really dictate that it's never used for any biological woman.

Just like how no one can dictate that I don't get to call men men and women women.

It's fun living in a fair and democratic society.

Men can't be women and women can't be men 🥳

JaninaDuszejko · 04/03/2021 20:57

Why do you think your sibling is transgender? The studies that have been done suggest transgender individuals are much more likely than average to be homosexual but have internalised homophobia (to be clear when I say homosexual I mean people who have the same sex chromosomes so e.g. your sibling is currently in a homosexual relationship however they choose to define their 'gender') OR they are much more likely to be victims of abuse and so have dysmorphia where they mentally disconnect with their body which they 'blame' for their abuse OR they are much more likely to have autism and try and apply logical rules to the idea of 'gender'. Think about which might apply to your sibling. I don't expect you to tell us (I hope ýou don't, it's not our business) but you should think about how you could help them come to terms with what ever makes them feel transgender. Because going down the transgender route involves a lifetime of medication and operations and surely you want to help them avoid that?

As an XX person (woman) you can either try and fit into the idea of 'gender' which keeps changing or you can recognise that 'gender' is a tool of the patriarchy which is used to keep women in their place. That is why feminists reject gender. We've had millennia of people with Y chromosomes and penises (aka men) telling us we can't be leaders/can't play football/can't vote/can't own property/can't be educated because it will affect how attractive we are/make us infertile/make us mad (hysterical). And now we're being told we've invited this upon ourselves because we're 'cis'. No. We face discrimination because of our sexed body, not because of some idea of 'gender' in our head. If we accept 'gender' we accept our oppression.

If you want to be 'cis' fine. But don't complain when you don't get a promotion or are sexually harrassed or are talked over. You have accepted that 'gender'.

Erkrie · 04/03/2021 20:57

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

prrtnyao · 04/03/2021 20:57

@strudsespark

I usually don't read the feminist board, but was goaded here by the cis headline.

Can anyone explain why posters are being banned for this thread, if the op isn't being banned for being goady and advertising this on Twitter?

Mumsnet are sweating buckets because they don't want to be labelled a "transphobic" site. So they're getting trigger happy and banning people.

MistressoftheDarkSide · 04/03/2021 20:58

So we can't dictate that the preface "Cis" is objectionable and meaningless when applied to the class of women, but others can dictate that we have to accept it because it's non-offensive and ultimately meaningless except to those who want to affix it to us without our consent? We have to ask nicely and meekly accept if our request is denied?

And we have to accept all dictats to refer to people by the terminology they choose even if it varies on a day to day basis and may not be obvious but must never be assumed ?

prrtnyao · 04/03/2021 20:58

@Erkrie

Good luck to her with her 600 followers. Her normal posts barely get a like it reply

Maybe her hard and persistent work will pay off today with likes and follows from prick news et al.

She took a screenshot of one of my replies and posted it. I feel like a celebrity! Glad she kept it for posterity as it was deleted here.

strudsespark · 04/03/2021 20:59

@prrtnyao thanks, but in my view op would be the first to go Confused.

Ninkanink · 04/03/2021 20:59

Fishing with fanny! I like it!

Is fanny a fish or can a fish be a fanny? Is fanny a foghorn, or are fogs horny? Is a wombat a bat? Or a womb?

So many questions.

Glamflimfloogety · 04/03/2021 20:59

You can ask for it not to be used for you but you can't really dictate that it's never used for any biological woman

@RootyT00t likewise I would say that transwomen can ask to be called women (and refer to themselves however they please), but they can't really dictate that it be used for biological men

WanderinWomb · 04/03/2021 21:00

Be careful @Cokie3
My only deletion that I'm aware of, because how do we know, was for using the word cu*t.
And it want cunt, cunt is allowed. 🙄