"I am not a gender - I am meta-gender. I am gendervoid".
Well, ok. Be whatever you want. But you can't keep getting angry because people call you a "mother" when they know the children with you are the ones you birthed. "I gave birth to them, but I'm not their mother". "Oh ok, so you're what, like, their surrogate right?". "No! I am their parent!". "Er, ok..." (backs away slowly from that can of worms).
On a different note, there is a mother in my child's class. He first of came out as trans non-binary. Asked for they/them pronouns, and changed name to suitable hip trans name. Cool - everyone did as asked, no problems. Then half a year later they became he. Said now he/him pronouns - fine. He said he is now father to his son, but mother to his son if son asks. Ok. But as is very much evident across the board with many, many trans people, the person is very narcissistic and that poor kid behaves horrifically in class and at home because he's desperately crying out for some attention but his mother only ever, ever, thinks of the mother's self. All Facebook posts are about the mother's feelings. How the mother just wants to be left alone all day so they can game and draw art and dedicate themselves tontheir "transness". The boy is actually a sweet, kind little child, but is so mixed up and left to look after himself because his mother is so busy posting trans and non-binary and "things cis people will never understand!" Facebook posts that he acts out constantly and "causes me so much trouble". The mother only ever talks about the mother's own problems - it's always me me me me me! and that kid never even gets a look in. I think, be whomever you want. But don't sacrifice your children's mental health along the way for your own narcissism.