Why are the trans community blaming women for the actions of men?

[ShirleyPhallus]

I’m reading everything I possibly can in light of JKR statement (which beautifully articulates everything I feel)

One thing I cannot see a clear answer to though is just why all the TRAs are just so angry at women. I have seen a serious of tweets linked on Facebook that talk about how dangerous JKR’s thinking is to the trans community as it makes “people” (I assume men?!) think that trans women are not real women.

Leaving aside the argument of whether they are or aren’t, does anyone know why TRAs aren’t more angry at the men who are actually doing the rape / murder / assault that also affects women and why they’re angry at women for standing up for themselves? This is more than just misogyny surely?

Women are a soft target. We’re supposed to move aside and let the men in, so they get angry when we say no. And it’s much safer threatening women, we’re not going to turn up at some TRAs house with a few burly mates.

I suspect also, that it’s resentment of the thing they can never be. We are women because we exist - the only way they can really validate themselves as women is by making the category of women disappear. Also, men hate women, any excuse to exercise aggressive misogyny.

Transactivism IS misogyny. By definition.

Because men are godly creatures to be admired by women since they can do no wrong.

Or something equally stupid.

Because subconsciously they know which team they're on. Because they hate women. Because women aren't threatening To them. Because it gives them a kick. Because women are meant to do what men say.

It’s almost as though they’re... acting with male aggression and entitlement? 🧐

I am wary of jargon, understandably, but I've found this useful:

collectivenarcissism.com/about-collective

"Collective narcissism is belief that the ingroup’s exceptionality is insufficiently appreciated by others (Golec de Zavala, Dyduch-Hazar, & Lantos, 2019). Collective narcissism is motivated by the investment of an undermined sense of self-importance into the belief in the ingroup’s entitlement to privilege. Collective narcissism lies in the heart of populist rhetoric. People endorsing the collective narcissistic belief are prone to biased perceptions of intergroup situations and to conspiratorial thinking. They retaliate to imagined provocations against the ingroup but often overlook real threats. They are prejudiced and hostile. Deficits in emotional regulation, hostile attribution bias, and vindictiveness seem to lie behind the robust link between collective narcissism and intergroup hostility." (emphasis mine)

The real threat: violent men who actually kill trans women, albeit at a rate that is not drastically different from how they kill 'cis' women because, shocker, these are not good guys.

The imagined threat: women who are broadly sympathetic but with some nuanced concerns, who are presented as wholly responsible for 'killing' trans people and threatened with violence.

It's a viciously misogynist movement, and to acknowledge this doesn't mean 'therefore I hate all trans people and want them to die', despite what the current woketalk would have anyone believe.

Notyourhandmaid perfect post and excellent research! 'Collective narcissism' - makes awful sense. I agree it is deeply unsettling and yes vicious misogyny.

It’s almost as though they’re... acting with male aggression and entitlement? 🧐
yup.

Poor JKR. 🥺

And actually ... poor women 😔

I think that for some of them there's an active drive of hatred of women.

But for the majority it's clear that they lack critical thinking skills. They also want to feel good about themselves. They are told X is the cause of the problem and with NO QUESTIONS jump on the band wagon and vent at X. And combined, I reckon that there are a LOT of people - both sexes - who have had a lot of access to hardcore (ie normal for today) porn and have very strange ideas about women. I don't mean sexual, simply the roles they are used to seeing women in.

So when women stand up, or are not in a submissive role, say they want a barriers and distinctions between them and men, and to exist without men in certain places, they deserve abuse. It doesn't even count as abuse to them, because it's deserved - hence why DR and EW etc haven't made a single comment about how the abuse should stop.

It's not abuse if it's deserved (according to them).

Like an abusers script...

*according to them - "them" being all the people who verbally abuse plus those who are complicit by not calling the abuse out.

A few random thoughts.

Some people do seem to be under the illusion that coming out with an unwelcome opinion/statement of facts is just as bad as physical violence. Obviously emotional abuse using words can be just as damaging, if not more so, than physical abuse, but dialogue and debate is not emotional abuse. Resilience and critical thinking are sadly lacking amongst some of the young people parrotting TWAW, TMAM, NBPAV!

Then there's the astonishing level of sexism that still underpins a lot of people's thinking. Women are not expected to be assertive and ask for anything for ourselves, especially as we get older and if we are mothers. Our role is to look after others and put ourselves and our needs last. Anything else is treated as selfishness, even when it's blindingly obvious that a man making the same statements/demands would be treated as entirely reasonable. A woman saying no is a threat.

(As an aside, I believe research has shown that when a woman is convicted of a crime her sentence is often harsher than the average given to a male convicted of the same offence. This would appear to be because as well as the lawbreaking the woman has also transgressed against what's expected of women, viz, be kind and put yourself and your needs last, not first. Obviously I'm not condoning crime in any way, but it's interesting that there seems to a kind of weary acceptance of male pattern violence and other criminal behaviours, and far more surprise and outrage if a woman behaves the same way.)

I'm in my late 50s. When I was in my 20s I thought feminism was irrelevant to my life because all the battles had been won. Ha ha ha! That's another factor here, though. I genuinely think some younger women (and a few of the men) have no idea how much female biology will impact on women's lives and careers. See attached cartoon.

Funny how they acknowledge biology when looking for someone to blame. We don’t play ball.

Jealousy.

Misogyny.

Tradition.

Women are the main protectors and defenders of children.

How many reasons do you need?

Misogyny

. I genuinely think some younger women (and a few of the men) have no idea how much female biology will impact on women's lives and careers.
Very true. A lot of the 20 something trans allies also seem to genuinely think that by not naming sex, we eliminate sexism.

Funny how it’s younger people who are leading on the environment, leading on BLM leading on trans rights and on so many other issues. It is their future to shape.

I’m not sure they hate all women, they loathe older women which i assumed might be a mother complex. That why they love throwing around ‘hag’ comments.

They just hate women who don’t adore them. With age comes maturity and common sense - therefore older women question, they don’t get carried away on the rainbow cloud, they have actual lives and live experience. They don’t have the time or patience to humour fools. They don’t just keep their mouth shut I’m case they upset a man.

And girlies - you will become middle aged, oh yeas you will. Social media will always follow you and you can’t pretend that you didn’t condone or get involved with pissing on women.

I will be old by then but will there to remind you. Every bloody day.

I LOVE the fact that everyone (god willing) gets old eventually. It makes me smile at night. Wonderful leveller.

“With age comes maturity” but often also racism, climate denial, transphobia and the rest. Only time will tell whether this generation holds to their beliefs or goes the same way.

Not everyone gets old sadly

So my parents and grandparents were racists bigots? Gee thanks but you are wrong there.

Not yours necessarily, but many are/were. This is not contentious, look at the research.

Yes there is something very familiar about the rage when women say no.

Same shit as always.

Sorry what research was that then? Is there a similar ‘why young people are naive fools? paper from the institute of stereotypes?