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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

Feminism: chat

Original poster

Men pushing in in queues and not social distancing.

741 replies

HeIenaDove · 03/04/2020 20:32

I know in the scheme of things this is only small but its the bloody entitlement that gets to me.

When the new Coronavirus Bill came in last Thursday two men used the 2 m gap to try to push in front while i was queuing outside Tesco.

Re, social distancing , i try i really try to stay 2m from people at all times on the rare occasions but the amount of men who walk right next to me or towards me KNOWING that i will move.

This afternoon was the final straw Queuing outside Sainsburys observing the 2 m rule i had to wait until the queue moved to where the trolleys were . There was no way i could get to them BEFORE queuing and observe the 2m rule so i had to wait in the queue before i got to them. I leant across to put my pound in the slot and the FOUR men queuing behind me jumped the queue by moving along in front.

Im so fed up with the entitlement Every time its been a man EVERY TIME. Ive not seen this from women at all .

OP posts:
RufustheLanglovingreindeer · 04/04/2020 19:48

horse

Grin

Dh just said that it didn’t feel like saturday

WELL IT DOES NOW!

LadyQuarantinaPluckington · 04/04/2020 19:50

WELL IT DOES NOW!

🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣

DidoLamenting · 04/04/2020 19:52

My entirely subjective, anecdotal experience based on this afternoon's outing is men on their own, women on their own , two men together have got the hang of things.

Some heterosexual couples- both parties- need to get over that joined at the hip and we won't be parted attitude.

TinselAngel · 04/04/2020 19:56

I can't stop chuckling at the idea of a particular way of sneezing being 'wrong

I swear the bloke downstairs from me coughs through a megaphone.

TinselAngel · 04/04/2020 20:07

For what it's worth, I think men are much worse at social distancing. I think this is because women are constantly subconsciously aware of potential predators and we instinctively keep our distance for that reason. So social distancing comes easy to us.

Men just don't have to think like this.

I used to notice it particularly if I was ever in my (small) kitchen at the same time as my most recent ex. Two women working in a small space will anticipate where the other one is moving to, and move out of the way. The ex would just stand there like a pillar of stone, oblivious.

DidoLamenting · 04/04/2020 20:15

For what it's worth. I don't agree. My own experience- pre Coronavirus- is there are both men and women who are oblivious to the concept of not getting uncomfortably close to people.

I don't spend my life constantly subconsciously aware of potential predators.

Gronky · 04/04/2020 20:20

I swear the bloke downstairs from me coughs through a megaphone.

What a monster, he's probably asserting dominance.

LadyQuarantinaPluckington · 04/04/2020 20:28

There are indeed men and women who are struggling with social distancing.

In my job, for which I have been out of the house every single day (clutch those pearls tighter), I've noticed that elderly women struggle with the distancing because they were very used to congregating in pairs to chat socially. So their issue with it stems from being very aware of other humans but perhaps not yet grabbing hold of exactly what 2 metres looks like in practice etc.

The men, on the other hand, have been blithely reaching across others, standing too close, ignoring clear distance markers for the opposite reason - when challenged, they will claim to 'know' the rules about distancing, but they seem so used to not registering their proximity to other people, that it's not really coming out in practice.

Among staff, most of the women, bar a particularly chummy pair of teenagers, are fastidious about distancing, but the few younger men are still prone to jokey rough-housing.

All anecdotal, of course, because I don't suppose any of us have any studies on this to cite. But still a reasonable thing to discuss on a feminist focused chat board, if permitted.

TheBewildernessisWeetabix · 04/04/2020 21:47

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

TheBewildernessisWeetabix · 04/04/2020 21:57

There are lots of tings like that, which are just people things, some people are rude, or dishonest, or tacky, or whatever. They aren't particulary feminist issue.

12th rule of misogyny: Women's ability to recognize male behavior patterns is misandry.

DidoLamenting · 04/04/2020 21:57

And the third bunch of men shopping WITH their wives. Why? Why trail around behind her, performing no useful purpose when he could sit in the car or stay at home and leave space for others’ safety

You have no way of knowing what the reason for this is. You've decided it's the man's fault. It could equally be at the woman's insistence- the joined at the hip syndrome some couples go in for. That's the inconsiderate behaviour I've been noticing. The several couples I saw today exercising their inalienable right to walk side by side no matter the width of the path.

Justhadathought · 04/04/2020 22:00

It all makes sense when you realize how controlling many men are.
Many of the men are there to supervise, and if necessary correct, the woman and to pay at check out because she has no access to money

And many aren't! They are there because they both like being 'a couple'......and/or because their female partner demands that of them, as a sign of 'devotion' to the cause.

We all project our own personal circumstances. Black and white generalisations does nobody any service.

TheBewildernessisWeetabix · 04/04/2020 22:02

The other reason the men go with their wives I forgot to mention is that some things are being rationed so they each buy a share.

You have no way of knowing what the reason for this is.
Yes I do. I lived it for a while when I was young, and I still see women to this day who are living it. Pay attention.

DidoLamenting · 04/04/2020 22:05

We all project our own personal circumstances. Black and white generalisations does nobody any service

Absolutely. Unnecessary couple supermarket shopping trips will be done for any number of reasons- some of the reasons might even be valid.

DidoLamenting · 04/04/2020 22:07

You have no way of knowing what the reason for this is

Yes I do. I lived it for a while when I was young, and I still see women to this day who are living it. Pay attention

Yeah because you know everything about every other couple in every supermarket in every country.

Justhadathought · 04/04/2020 22:07

Yes I do. I lived it for a while when I was young, and I still see women to this day who are living it. Pay attention

Nobody is denying your personal experience ( & I can well believe it, having observed many relationships from a distance)...or that of any other woman; but your personal experience is not a good basis for such sweeping generalisations. Male/female relationships don't all conform to set and rigid pattern.

TheBewildernessisWeetabix · 04/04/2020 22:17

Comicshadows, the thing you are doing is called sealioning and it is a form of trolling.
So, if you are not here to troll you need to stop belaboring the questioning of the right of people to express their opinion about the opinions of others when they are effing stupid.

TheBewildernessisWeetabix · 04/04/2020 22:18

12th rule of misogyny: Women's ability to recognize male behavior patterns is misandry.

TheBewildernessisWeetabix · 04/04/2020 22:20

Nobody is denying your personal experience
No, you are denying my observational skills. Of which you know nothing and I know everything.

Comicshadows · 04/04/2020 22:21

Oh give it a rest. Think what you like about me. I'm neither sealioning or a troll. Move on.

Justhadathought · 04/04/2020 22:25

No, you are denying my observational skills. Of which you know nothing and I know everything

No, I'm not....what we observe and pick up on often has much to do with our own personal experience and expectation.nobody is denying your experience.

I never take a man shopping. Why the heck would I want to do that? I like being in control of my own experience, and I don't tend to choose men who like to control mine. That's my experience. It's different to yours.

DidoLamenting · 04/04/2020 22:28

Justhadathought is one of the most thoughtful regular posters. She is not denying any one's experience or observational skills.

I0NA · 04/04/2020 22:29

12th rule of misogyny: Women's ability to recognize male behavior patterns is misandry

That’s an excellent point @TheBewildernessisWeetabix.

There seems to be a lot of sea lions about this weather. They must be bored “ working from home”.

Gronky · 04/04/2020 22:31

Why trail around behind her, performing no useful purpose when he could sit in the car or stay at home and leave space for others’ safety.

It all makes sense when you realize how controlling many men are. Many of the men are there to supervise, and if necessary correct, the woman and to pay at check out because she has no access to money.

Good Lord Shock, I've spent most of my life single but can still recognise that a couple might find each other's company comforting, even if there's no immediate communication, especially during this difficult time.

Femail · 04/04/2020 22:34

Men are the worst from my experience working in a supermarket and they are often the abusive ones
Last week one was moaning about only being able to buy just 3 tomatoes and could of brought a pack but wanted loose ones. Then on the same day a man was moaning very rudely at my colleague so I stepped in and told him not to be so dam rude were here risking our health and your moaning about meat. He said hes not being rude so my supervisor came over and took him away Grin