8 year old boy wants to change with the girls

[FairytaleofBykerGrove]

I’ve been informed that a boy in my daughters class ‘feels like a girl’. He’s been wearing dresses to school for a while (fine) and now wants to change with the girls for swimming. Apparently the children will all accept it no problem and they’d like the parents to do the same. He will be under a poncho towel so we don’t have to worry about his privacy(?) I am really very unhappy with this. Which is why I’m up at 3 in the morning. The other parents I’ve spoken to don’t seem to care either way. I can’t understand it at all. Do you have any advice for me?

Agreed NearlyGranny
It's time we started to call this out for what it is. The systematic grooming of children. Just as we know children with eating disorders can be groomed online by pro ana sites and others are groomed to become terrorists, so our children are being groomed into believing that they might be born in the wrong body.
I'm not going to comment on the motivations of adults who are insistent on accessing children and promoting this view (cos I'll get deleted) but I will call out the many many thousands of useful idiots in the NHS, education, social care, the law and politics who despite understanding about age of consent etc, abandon all their knowledge in the face of this intimidatory ideology. I hope that as this unravels all those in schools etc who are perpetuating this will be held to account professionally.

I hope that as this unravels all those in schools etc who are perpetuating this will be held to account professionally

Its already started to unravel. But mo where seems to be dialling back on the stuff they have implemented.

They fear the loss of "respect" from the public from admitting they were wrong more than they fear for the shattered lives of the children involved.

If proof of claims that autism can be cured by transitioning wont get a school cutting ties then i dont know what will..

Girls are encouraged to have boundaries it seems until the powers that be decide that they have to undress in front of boys if those boys identify as girls.

Saying they can opt out if they request a private changing room singles the objectors out and opens them to accusations from consenting classmates of transphobia and possibly to bullying as a result.

It also ignores the social pressure on girls to be kind, not make a fuss, to fit in- basically they are conditioning them to shut up and put up which makes it more likely the girls will bite down their embarrassment and humiliation to benefit their trans classmate rather than ask for those rooms.

It completely erodes the biological female pupils feelings and rights in favour of one student’s needs.

It beggars belief what the boy's parents and the school are thinking.
This is all so Wrong, on so many levels.

Came across this because it had been retweeting by a transactivist, ironically enough.

The boy gets to keep his modesty (is that the purpose of the poncho?), but the girls absolutely don't and are just collateral damage??

This. Times a gazillion.

Please do come back when you know more. There are a lot of us rooting for these children. Both the boy and the girls involved.

I really want to know how this is resolved .
Our rights and boundaries are absolutely being eroded

Oh DuLANG I hadn't heard that one for a while but it is so true.

" The only people who get upset when you set boundaries are the people who benefit from you having none "

And, regardless of this little boy's identity, whatever that may emerge to be (and good luck to him with it), he also needs to learn how to set boundaries for his own safety.

This is not a lesson he will learn until he can manage to hear and cooperate with someone else's "No".

I agree with PP. Let him change with the boys AND ASK THE BOYS TO BE NICE!!!

Makes me wonder: who will benefit from this little boy not understanding how to set and enforce boundaries? Or how to respect the boundaries set by others?

We know that CSA trauma can sometimes manifest as a cross sex identity.

And the dad of the daughter who thinks this little boy’s request is more important than his own daughter’s right to privacy and dignity - is he benefiting from the women and girls in his life not setting boundaries?

Red flags everywhere.

My grandson, likes wearing dresses, in fact he wore one to his school disco.

He is 4 3/4

He wanted to use the ladies toilets, because 'I am a girl', I said 'No you are a boy, who likes wearing dresses and that's ok'. But you need to use the boys toilets..

If when he is a lot older and has decided he actually feels like a girl, we will support him

Hopefully you’ll continue to reiterate that as he’s male he doesn’t belong in the girl’s toilets? This doesn’t just apply to the under 8’s.

If when he is a lot older and has decided he actually feels like a girl, we will support him

Hopefully you'll support the rights of women and girls in that process.

What does ‘actually feeling like a girl’ entail to you then?

Because being a girl isn’t a feeling, a girl is a minor human female. If you don’t have a female body, you can’t possibly know what it’s like to ‘feel like a girl’.

All power to boys in frocks though.
Total clothing rights for all ✊🏻

Of course, he is a boy, with boy bits and its not acceptable for him to be with the girls (Ok 5 is a bit young, just yet)

He is obsessed with frozen and being Elsa, which is where this whole wearing dresses, having Elsa hair, I am a girl has come from.

He can continue to use boy facilities as he grows up as wearing a dress and having Elsa hair, does not make him a girl. Even if he says I am a girl, but keeps his boy bits.

This 8yr old boy should not be changing with the girls, he is uncomfortable with changing with boys, for what ever reason, this needs to be addressed, but not to the detriment of the girls.

And this goes even more for Men who self ID

Are you the grandmother, Greenkit? I’m not sure why being obsessed with Elsa would give him the impression that he can be a girl if he chooses to be? Is anyone around him giving him that impression, and why aren’t they nipping the notion firmly in the bud instead?

Yes I am GM

I dont know maybe the obsession with her and swirling round in a dress. And being told by school/friends that girls wear dresses and well he wants to wears dresses, so he wants to be a girl??

I have no idea, he is nearly 5, what goes through their heads.

I have told him firmly he is a boy and so has his mum and dad.

He can be a boy and wear dresses, he doesn't need to be a girl and he wont be using girl spaces

"Let's give all children their childhood back and stop political lobby groups poking and prodding them in such perverse ways!"
Absolutely!

If a poncho is an ok hide away when in the girls, then it should be fine in the boys as well.

He knows he is a boy so his issue must be that he doesn't like changing with the other boys...he should change in a room alone or with the other boys under his poncho.

The girls may say they don't mind but it may bother them. I had a childhood experience, which people might say was fine but I still remember it, and I remember it because it was not fine and I was too young to articulate my feelings or stand up to my parent. It breached my privacy and my boundaries but as a child, I was regarded to have none. I was probably of a similar age then.

People keep saying this little boy doesn't like changing with the other boys, but do we even know that much is true?

I suspect this all originates from entitled parents putting ideas into the kid's head. Some parents seem to push their child towards transitioning so they can be TRAs and pick fights and bully others and generally demand attention and accomodation.

I suspect this all originates from entitled parents putting ideas into the kid's head. Some parents seem to push their child towards transitioning so they can be TRAs and pick fights and bully others and generally demand attention and accomodation

Certain organisations tell schools they can transition children behind parents back. The parents even need to approve...

My point is you are assuming all trans people are predatory

More lies and mistruths.