Has any woman here ever been mistaken for a bloke?

[WomanBornNotWorn]

I've always been bigger than most other girls / women.

Despite an officially (Gok Wan hah!!) hourglass shape (waist 75% of equal sized hip/shoulders) etc etc etc, no gender confusion and what not, my overall bigliness (I'm the height of the average British bloke so half of them are smaller than me) has always been a potential for problems.

Oversized feet, big jaw, broad shoulders send ... the wrong message.

Never been particularly GNC, just not 'slim, dainty, girly, feminine, flirtatious, hot' and all the rest of that template stuff women are 'supposed to be'.

Each time I've been mis-sexed I remember with a jolt. Where I was, who said what, how I reacted - and what I was wearing. I actually think twice about what I wear in case it triggers an incident. Certain things I shy away from - Lace up shoes, trousers with jackets especially.

It's really rare to be fair, but over a lifetime that's a little collection I'd rather not have in the memory bank.

Does anyone else share this little anxiety?

I once saw Ann Ruzylo make a 'I get misgendered all the time so get used to it' type of comment.

Yes, my bank thinks I’m a man. I don’t know why. I have no idea where they got the idea from. It must have been a clerical error. Even so, you’d think they’d have realised at some point that Mr. Jessica isn’t right.

I used to very frequently be mistaken for a boy when I was younger. I’m 4’11” and when I was a skinny thing in my 20s with short hair I used to get it all the time.

In real life never, I'm very slender with narrow shoulders, tiny wrists, slender neck etc.

I never wear skirts or make up, don't possess any, never wear heels, can't due to an old injury, but even in a sack I'm too obviously small to be mistaken for a man.

Online is another matter. In more mixed sex spaces than Mumsnet I am almost always assumed to be a bloke due to the interests I have and usernames (often science related) I tend to pick.

(I never post online in my real name as I value my privacy and have never really understood why others are happy to broadcast every last detail of their lives to the world)

Only on this forum- in real life, never.

I'm a bit taller than average for a woman and very broad shouldered. I have quite narrow hips for a woman too. When I was young and had a big coat I was mistaken for a man by a waiter who saw me from the back. I found it amusing but he was very flustered.

online including work context, frequently. I take it as a compliment. Real life never no matter what I wear / how I do my hair. I tried hard as a teenager but I’m not large with very girlie shape.

I'm a woman and I've been mistaken for a man in the sink area in a woman's toilet once. I am tall (taller than the average male height) and I was wearing a big down jacket as it was cold outside, so my figure was hard to detect. The woman who mistook me for a man left the toilets quickly as she thought she'd entered the men's toilets, then she came back in and apologised. She was embarrassed, I said there was no need to apologise and that was it, no problem. I haven't modified what I wear because I might be mistaken again, I am just not bothered.

No, never. But my DH regularly does (until they see his face) - he's very slim with long hair. I don't get the impression it bothers him.

Yes. The Scottish Government recently replied to my email to SA Somerville addressing me as 'Mr Scrimshaw'. (I hadn't given a sex or title.)

In real life, yes, when younger I was sometimes got 'son'. I suppose relatively tall, sometimes short hair, and I often wear/wore pretty non-descript asexual clothing.

Now seguing from that into middle-aged mother's invisibility, am pretty obviously female.

Hasn't ever given me the slightest jolt, though, couldn't really care less if someone misgenders me. Mostly found it quite funny.

All the time when I was a child.

But that's because my mother cut my hair short and dressed me in 'boy's clothes' and it's a lot harder to tell before puberty sets in.

Not since I got boobs/hips has anyone mistaken me for a boy - even when wearing masculine clothing.

Never mistaken for a bloke. I don't dress feminine, so a few times mistaken for a butch lesbian. Which I take as a compliment and don't screech oppression all over the Twatter about.

Yep. Once, in a restaurant. I’m small but curvy and at the time I had long-ish blonde hair. My colleagues thought it was hilarious that the same waiter called me “sir” three times.

Weirdly when I had cropped hair nobody got it wrong.

Yes. Not so much recently, though it does still happen occasionally, but in my 20s. Short hair, not particularly feminine clothing (though the last time it happened I was wearing a skirt!) and I think I move in a fairly blokey way. FaceApp also thought I was a man!

Kids are sometimes confused by me, I’ve heard many a little ask a parent ‘is that a lady or a man?’ but it’s more because I dress like a weirdo than anything to do with biology or performed masculinity/feminity.

I’ve been called ‘sir’ by customer service types who aren’t paying attention (who correct themselves immediately) and in text, because my name is a male diminutive name.

Once, when I was in a gay bar in a social group with a bunch of TV/TS MtF’s I overheard a man ask his mate ‘is that an actual woman or a really good looking t**y’?

On the phone yes. Very deep rough voice. In person, no.

However I suspect a woman at work of actually being a man. If so I would guess she’s been transitioned for a very long time (old school transsexual). Very male features and stature but way overboard with the make up/hair/clothes, almost a parody of what a man thinks a woman looks like. Also a very flowery ridiculous name.

I’ve never voiced it obviously and wouldn’t ask but I’m surprised nobody else has ever said it.

I do sometimes, not very often and I understand why but it doesn't make me feel good when it does happen.
I have short hair, am 5ft 6 and a bit skinny. Not much shape to me, and I don't find fitted clothes comfortable so am often in a men's t shirt & football shorts for the gym etc. I'm not one for skirts or dresses or things like that and don't wear make up.
I'm not very girly, but definitely not a man!

NC’d for this............Yes, now and then. I’m well over 6 foot tall, short hair and not exactly sylphlike. I’m also usually clad in jeans and t-shirt. When it happens I do not accuse the perpetrator of ‘literal violence’. My response is usually and carry on with my day.

I’ve also occasionally noticed people giving me the side-eye in the ladies loo - am tempted to flash the vulva but have resisted so far .

Yes! I'm 6', and have frequently been called Sir.
It doesn't bother me at all. I wear men's clothes sometimes so am not surprised if ppl mistake me for a man.
It doesn't change me or my identity if someone else makes a mistake!
(I've never been mistaken for a man when wearing obviously womens clothes!)

I used to get it a lot when I shaved my head as a teen and 20 something.
My hair has been cropped very short on and off thtoughout my life and it has happened a few times ..the only one that sticks in my mind is when i was massively pregnant, which made me laugh!!
It's never made me anxious or upset though.
I've got shaved sides and back now and a quiff, and work with little children who think it is funny that I have 'man's hair'.
My dd2 has short blonde hair and gets called a boy all the time by the same small children and my ds's classmates, (most of whom have autism) - I think it is because it breaks a perceived rule of how people should look. It always leads to interesting conversations about how we choose to look and dress etc

but way overboard with the make up/hair/clothes, almost a parody of what a man thinks a woman looks like. Also a very flowery ridiculous name

What a charming person you are.

I get mistaken for a man quite regularly. I am tall, i wear ‘mens’ clothes and shoes mostly. I’m not performing masculinity, its just what I find comfortable/fits.

I was physically attacked once, the blokes mate yelled “its a girl!” and he backed off then.

I’m often mistaken for a man over email at work, I work with the US a lot and my name is spelt like a mans name there.

I’m a woman, i have no desire to be a man but the mistakes aren’t anything i am bothered about (other than the being attacked!)

I know several women over 6' tall, taller than me, and most annoyingly they could never be mistaken for anything but women. And several shorter blokes who are mini hunks. And several responses here have been from less heighty women, who've still had the annoyance. So I have to conclude height isn't all that important. I wonder if it's more scale than height? Width of jaw, shoulders, size of hands and feet being read as male because - as we know - male skeletons and skulls regardless of height are generally heftier than female.

I don't dress feminine, so a few times mistaken for a butch lesbian. Which I take as a compliment

Why take this as a compliment? Are butch lesbians better than other women?

online including work context, frequently. I take it as a compliment

Again- why take this as a compliment?