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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

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Original poster

Remember that grey hair is rarely attractive

159 replies

TheGreysAreComing · 07/08/2019 16:46

5. Remember that grey hair is rarely attractive unless you have the correct combination of skin tone and eye colouring! (You suit clothes in blues, lilacs, greys and pinks and have neutral skin tone and grey/blue eyes).

www.danielfieldmailorder.co.uk/support/?q=1017

Thoughts? Posting this in FWR as I know AIBU will be full of posters who wish to post that actually they do believe grey hair on women is unattractive.. like pubes, and women leaving the house without a chaperone face full of makeup.

Regardless of a person's personal beliefs on grey hair (or any colour) there is something exceptionally sexist and patronising in advising women to remember they are unattractive. Now, now ladies, lest you forget or start to feel confident in your hair colour, you are probably unattractive.

Also, I've known lots of beautiful black women with grey hair btw but not a single one with blue eyes though.. so not sure if this brand counts them or not. Hmm

OP posts:
ArnoldWhatshisknickers · 08/08/2019 09:39

I've been going grey since I was 16. My mum also went grey as a teenager and like her my greyness began as a streak up the middle. I hated that so dyed it in my 20s but once it extended round the sides ditched the dye with a huge sigh of relief. I guess I was about 33 then.

Worse than that, I have long grey hair, so am clearly hideous.

By the way, who is Daniel Field and why am I supposed to give a rat's arse what he thinks?

Rocaille · 08/08/2019 11:52

IMO, Daniel is right to think grey hair is rarely attractive, but wrong to think we should necessarily give a shit. There's a lot more to life than being attractive to men.

youkiddingme · 08/08/2019 12:38

The only worthwhile women are young ones that men find shaggable.
It's not a new message from companies who want to sell their crap. I'm grey, hairy, un-made-up and not remotely interested in buying said crap. But guess what , non-barbie women can laid too if they want. Up yours Daniel.

ErrolTheDragon · 08/08/2019 12:51

I'd take a bet this bloke will think he's attractive when he starts to go grey, despite having inappropriate colouring.Hmm

MyVisionsComeFromSoup · 08/08/2019 13:02

I have grey hair (well actually silver), which suits me much better than the colours I dyed it when I was younger. And, Daniel Field, the colours I get most compliments when wearing are mustard and orange, so you can just fuck off with your patronising guff about colour analysis and how I should buy into your industries need to sell me unnecessary products

NonnyMouse1337 · 08/08/2019 14:29

Thanks for the tip, TheCountessofFitzdotterel :)

Hithere12 · 08/08/2019 17:53

Well I mean most of us end up dying our hair so don’t know why he’s getting flamed for stating the obvious 🤷‍♀️

ErrolTheDragon · 08/08/2019 18:22

Do we? Men don't. So if that's true, why?

That's kind of the point...Hmm

Goosefoot · 08/08/2019 18:25

It's expectation, but it is true, this guy didn't make it up, it's been around a long time and a lot of women buy into it.

ErrolTheDragon · 08/08/2019 18:47

If he'd said, lots of people like to cover greys, here's some great dye, I doubt anyone would have noticed. It's the arrogant, opinionated, objectifying 'remember, grey hair is rarely attractive!' which is flame-worthy.

Hithere12 · 08/08/2019 18:56

Do we? Men don't. So if that's true, why?

2/3rds of men are bald by the time they’re 35. Loads of men use “just for men” hair dye they aren’t going to announce it to the world.

ErrolTheDragon · 08/08/2019 19:05

Most of the blokes I know may be bald on top but they have grey elsewhere and I don't believe the idea of dyeing it enters their heads.

I bet the percentages are quite different. Any evidence to support 'loads'?

Hithere12 · 08/08/2019 19:18

I bet the percentages are quite different. Any evidence to support 'loads'?

What stick do you have up your arse? When I said “we” I was clearly talking about women, and women do dye their hair more often, which you’ve admitted to!

Maybe women are just more vain than men & care more about their looks? Not everything is a conspiracy.

Hithere12 · 08/08/2019 19:20

The person who wrote the article has their opinion on grey hair, I happen to not find balding men attractive, it’s just opinions 🤷‍♀️

Deadringer · 08/08/2019 19:25

Yes not only are we unattractive but we are dozy old bitches who might forget that we are unattractive and venture out in public. Thanks for the grey heads up Daniel.

MargueritaBlue · 08/08/2019 19:40

MO, Daniel is right to think grey hair is rarely attractive, but wrong to think we should necessarily give a shit. There's a lot more to life than being attractive to men

I dye my hair. I don't dye it to be attractive to men. Oh I know that will cue the usual patronising responses about I might think that, but feminists with their higher enlightenment know better

MargueritaBlue · 08/08/2019 19:45

Most of the blokes I know may be bald on top but they have grey elsewhere and I don't believe the idea of dyeing it enters their heads

I've known a few men who do and they tend to be laughed at behind their backs. Who knows? If it were socially acceptable may be they might. I've seen men in the (enormously expensive and very good) salon I go to. I don't think you would know my hair is dyed unless you stopped to think that at my age it might be unlikely to have no grey. I assume the effects on their male clients are equally good.

Rocaille · 09/08/2019 15:47

I dye my hair. I don't dye it to be attractive to men.

That's interesting. Why do you dye it then? I'm not being facetious, I genuinely can't think of any inducement other than sex that would be powerful enough to outweigh the faff and expense?

The only reason I make any effort with my appearance is in order to be attractive to men. My grooming is deteriorating with my waning libido. When it finally fizzles out, I shall do nothing other than observe the most basic personal hygiene.

ErrolTheDragon · 09/08/2019 15:58

I don't dye my hair (the sort of fair hair which will presumably just fade rather than grey) but I can understand why some people want to for purely aesthetic reasons - similar to those of us who like a nice dress (with pocketsWink). For some people, grey may be an aesthetic choice too.

MargueritaBlue · 09/08/2019 16:42

That's interesting. Why do you dye it then? I'm not being facetious, I genuinely can't think of any inducement other than sex that would be powerful enough to outweigh the faff and expense?

The only reason I make any effort with my appearance is in order to be attractive to men

Nope- doesn't enter into it one iota.

I like being well dressed, groomed and elegant. I like tailored, expensive, classic clothes and/or tailored , expensive, unusual clothes. I have a number of made to order dresses from a designer the Dutchess of Cornwall uses. Dyeing my hair is just part of that look. I do this for myself.

MargueritaBlue · 09/08/2019 16:45

but I can understand why some people want to for purely aesthetic reasons - similar to those of us who like a nice dress (with pockets). For some people, grey may be an aesthetic choice too

Indeed. I'm a bit Confused at the idea one would only care about one's appearance to catch a man.

MIdgebabe · 09/08/2019 17:09

IF you accept that more women dye their hair then men, you MIGHT want to then decide why.

If you assume that women care more about appearance, you need to think why.

The options are that women are on average born that way, implying also a female brain.

Or that women are conditioned into it by society. In that case, who made the rules and why? Why do women in particular want to look nice more so then men and why does looking nice mean we want to avoid grey hair, again more so than men?

Nanamilly · 09/08/2019 17:13

That's interesting. Why do you dye it then?

I started to play around with my hair colour because once I started going grey at a very young age I didn’t know who the hell I was looking at on the mirror. It took a decade to get used to. Then one day everything just seemed to come together, I was in the hairdressers every 4 weeks and we were fighting Mother Nature so I just decided there and then - never again.

I’m completely grey now but it’s lovely and people ask who my hairdresser is and what highlights etc I have. 😂.

The irony.

merrymouse · 09/08/2019 17:17

Or that women are conditioned into it by society.

Or that men are conditioned out of it.

Many men find it very difficult to take part in any activity branded as feminine.

MargueritaBlue · 09/08/2019 17:32

If you assume that women care more about appearance, you need to think why

If you are speaking to me, no I don't. I really don't care. I hate being scruffy and badly dressed. I think it is utterly bizarre that someone thinks the only point of caring about their appearance is to catch a man.

It really is wearisome.