Beauty regime burdens

[Sunkisses]

Given recent threads on make up and false nails that have produced much debate and defensiveness, I thought a thread highlighting all the ever more elaborate and costly things and products women are expected to do to their appearance now could be illuminating. Particularly new things, or things that have become a lot more mainstream. Men are not expected to 'groom' and spend so much time/money on their appearance, and many women think just because they 'choose' to, it's not a feminist issue. It is, particularly the messages we send our daughters that our purpose is to be decorative. Things like:
Push up bras
Leg hair removal
Pubic hair removal, especially waxing and Brazilians - ouch
Underarm hair removal
False eyelashes
Eyebrow threading
Hair that costs a fortune (highlights etc)
Body contouring underwear
Botox and fillers
Plastic surgery like breast implants
Hair extensions
Fake tan
False fingernails

Eh?

The news coverage of Katie Price and any number of WAGS far outweighs that of Malala! It's pretty obvious who our society is generally more interested in.

That's true, but are they really looking up to them?

Malala gets masses of press coverage, all of it positive. WAGS are sneered at as is Katie Price.

I'm presuming we're all on the same page with 'looking up to' meaning 'being a bit obsessed by' as opposed to holding deep respect and appreciation of.

But you're soooo going to disagree with me about this rather than just say 'oh, I see what you're saying' [yawn]

To Lass not Dey

I'm presuming we're all on the same page with 'looking up to' meaning 'being a bit obsessed by' as opposed to holding deep respect and appreciation of

Why would I be on the same page with that? "Looking up to" doesn't remotely mean obsessed by.

[look up to someone]toadmireandrespect someone

Fig.to view someone with respect and admiration.Bill really looks up to his father.Everyone in the class looked up to the teacher

Not even remotely agreeing then

The news coverage of Katie Price and any number of WAGS far outweighs that of Malala! It's pretty obvious who our society is generally more interested in.

Agree

I'm a bit surprised that covering up grey hair has only been mentioned a couple of times. Surely that's the biggest pressure - and burden - of them all? And for the industry, the longest gravy train?

Looking up Katie Price and WAGS

I think this is very dependant on your influences. I have never looked up any WAGS or Katie Price or the Kardashians or anyone like that. My nieces, God Daughters and friends daughters are not interested at all in any of them.

Good for them

Remember when Princess Diana was a beauty icon - I had that haircut as a kid, it was very popular.

Lots of us had this hairstyle. Lots of us also had "the purdy" in the 70s.

Isn't that the key? These styles became a trend because women and girls were following a celebrity trend. Isn't this what long hair is now? It's a trend copied from celebrities.

Another will be along soon, it isn't a new thing.

I admit to only having had three of those - Leg hair removal, Underarm hair removal, Body contouring underwear I still do the first two, and the third was years ago for a wedding when I was heavier than I wanted to be and bought some shapewear to hide the flab. Not a pleasant experience and I haven't repeated it. Did the job though!

Thinking about what someone posted about valuing healthy bodies - I sort of think this where some of it started.

We do value healthy looking bodies. It's just that getting and maintaining a healthy body takes, effort and discipline. You need to exercise and eat healthily basically. At some level that's not very exciting and takes time and means that you have to deprive yourself of eating junk food or drinking too much.

Then cosmetic surgery became affordable for so many people. So there was a way to maintain a healthy looking body but without the work. Liposuction, implants, sculpting abs, face lifts, tummy tucks etc.

But then it went further and became more extreme.

So I guess we do value healthy looking bodies but we don't want to do what is necessary to maintain it and take short cuts.

You need to exercise and eat healthily basically. At some level that's not very exciting and takes time and means that you have to deprive yourself of eating junk food or drinking too much

Well slightly changing the subject, but eating healthily is delicious and junk food generally tastes foul. Unfortunately junk food is more available to the poor and you need more exposure to good cooking to be able to eat healthily, which is also a luxury.

Did a man really show up to this thread and tell us what beauty practices women should or shouldn't undertake in order for him to find them attractive? Incredible.

Thanks for giving us a display of that particular male belief that you're all judges in a beauty contest Caucho, and you get to comment when women aren't living up to your standards. Yuck.

Back to the thread, I was in M&S today and there was a beauty saleswoman flogging extremely expensive facecream (£60). She was telling the woman she was talking to that it would "reshape your face". You can't escape the beauty imperative anywhere, even in Markies. Selling women magic creams that do absolutely nothing, all because we've been taught to not like our faces as they are.

This was the range she was selling:

www.marksandspencer.com/l/beauty/filorga?extid=ps_ggl_UK_BG_Beauty_Brands_Filorga&gclsrc=aw.ds&&gclid=EAIaIQobChMIwPu5t4qs3AIVAQAAAB0BAAAAEAAYACAAEgJVzfD_BwE

That's a lot of products for women's "wrong" faces.

I think whenever there are conversations like this, the number one thing people struggle to let go of is shaving legs and armpits. Lots of people would rather not bother and know its a learned preference, but can't bring themselves not to.
A big part of it is social reasons but what is maybe more interesting is that often its just such a strongly felt aesthetic preference of the woman herself. I'm in that boat, I'm fully aware of its subjective quality and think it would be better to do without it, but I just don't want to in the end. I often don't wear make-up, or do complicated hair stuff, and I stopped dyeing my hair. But I haven't given up shaving and I almost can't see it ever happening.

I've wondered why it seems to have such a strong reaction.

There's an product in that lot called 'Absolute Eye Correction Cream' 15ml for £47.

I thought prescription lenses were the only way to 'correct' eyes?

Isn't that the key? These styles became a trend because women and girls were following a celebrity trend. Isn't this what long hair is now? It's a trend copied from celebrities.

I largely agree, it goes back and forth and has for years. I would say right now it seems to me there is in a sense less variety than in some other periods, or maybe less mixing? It almost reminds me of what has happened with music, pop music is really very bland, it sounds all very similar. There are other genres, but you don't tend to get a lot of mixing between them, on radio stations, etc.

My DD, a young teen, showed me some make-up videos on YouTube that she and her friends like. She is at an all girls school and sees make-up as a game she can play. I'm not "girly" never worn stilettos my feet are not deformed but I can understand that she wants to shave and use make-up when she wants to.

When my DS is older I would support him if he wants to wear make-up or follow fashions of his choosing. My point is that sometimes it's not a burden it's just for fun and a matter of choice.

Re shaving A big part of it is social reasons but what is maybe more interesting is that often its just such a strongly felt aesthetic preference of the woman herself

But where do you get you're aesthetic preferences from if not society? Lots of women I've known find it gross when men shave their legs and find it way more aesthetically pleasing for their male partners to have hairy legs.

The choices we think are our own are in some part influenced by the society we are raised in.

barelove

Sure, I'm not disputing they come from society. But what I am saying is that its not just social pressure, even when that particular issue is one where many people find it a pain, wish it wasn't the fashion, but feel quite strongly the aesthetic pull.

Compared to something like make up, I think it seems more extreme. People who really find make-up a pain often give up wearing it unless its social pressure that stops them.

I'm just curious why so many people feel strongly about shaving in particular, even if they know its learned.

@PackingSoap i was thinking the same thing just recently.

Take lipstick colors ................a lot of them are too bright and garish or too dark...................and i totally think its so it shows up on bloody Instagram. I was looking for a pink one today and finally settled on a Revlon one called Pink in the Afternoon.

I cant bloody afford waxing anymore so my legs havent been done for three and a half years. But my preference is much older men which partly came about BECAUSE of the attitudes shown by men my own age so it doesnt really matter to me what bods like Caucho think.

Chin gets waxed, grey hair gets colored out as im a dark brunette. I have thick hair. Im half Italian and thick hair runs in that side of the family. This is all i can afford to do. So glad im 46 Id hate to be 26 now.