Cosmopolitan - Bleeding after anal sex

[ItsAllGoingToBeFine]

""It's not unexpected that [anal sex] would cause bleeding." Does that mean you should never put anything up your butt hole? No! It just means you need to take some extra precautions, like, say, a little thing called a shit-ton of lube"

"It's not a sprint, it's a marathon back there. And you want to make to the finish line without any bleeding or discomfort."

FFS

www.cosmopolitan.com/sex-love/amp9230630/is-bleeding-after-anal-sex-normal/?__twitter_impression=true

You were the one who clearly associated gratefulness with attractiveness. Own it and stop trying to bully me by saying others don't appear see any issue with it.

And you are the chosen one for some reason 😉😉

I know litl it's a bit mad isn't it!

Haha now you got to own haha

Hahaha own it

I'm a little confused about how this thread turned into a grudgematch against Nothing for being aware that she's attractive and not being ashamed to admit it. Some people can start an argument in an empty room, I suppose.

Where did I say I was angry you were married to a lovely man ? Now who's making stuff up.

It's nothing to do with her being aware she is attractive, it's her saying in a discussion about the pressures young women are under (and most you women struggle with body image) that your appearance influences how grateful men are to get into your bed.

I have managed to have a discussion about this without telling everyone men find me very attractive.

You were the one who clearly associated gratefulness with attractiveness.
Have you never felt grateful for a brilliant shag? Is "lucky" a better word? I've felt lucky when I've pulled an attractive woman, and/or had a great time with her. Should I have felt entitled instead? Should I look for women I don't find attractive instead?
I don't understand.
What's wrong with being grateful?

All the lols.
Still going on Elon 😂😂😂😉

Well, men do tend to fawn over very beautiful women, but that wasn't actually her point, which everyone else in the thread sees so I'm not sure why you don't.

My cat is running around screaming for no apparent reason, and somehow that still makes more sense than this bloody thread!

Most young women are attractive, aren't they?

I think they are

And I also think that back in the day, most young men were pretty happy to pull a girl, and generally vice versa also.

Now it seems boys have a much greater sense of entitlement. And seem to think they should ALL be able to pull the best looking women. Like the incel types, and online dating, all the men irrespetive of their level of attractiveness think they are entitled to models and get angry when the really good looking women don't want them.

Things have changed and it's not for the good.

And when they do get a girl to go to bed with them, they expect to get what they want and the girls expects to have a bad time, all too often. And if they read this article, they will understand that bleeding is normal, just try harder, be none the wiser about STDs or important of condoms as related to protection.

YES things have changed for sure.

Well just the mad bits kittens.
A lot of it was good very good points were made

Brace yourself nothing

So, like, haven't most people had a moment where some new person takes their clothes off and your first thought is "thank you Jesus/Ceiling Cat/Aphrodite/Satan/whoever has been so kind as to grant me this amazing view, I will be sure to show my appreciation in as direct a manner as possible"? And apparently we aren't supposed to be grateful for lovers being lovely people either, so I'm not sure what we are allowed to appreciate in a sexual partner.

Isnt that that advice from the article?

Maybe we're meant to be grateful for all the lube that the article tells us is needed for any sort of sex? That's my best guess at this point.

Maybe the word gratitude hits the wrong note

lucky
?

I doubt it matter to be honest.

I don't think answers to the actual questions will be forthcoming.

And still no post saying NO to putin so there's that too.

Now it seems boys have a much greater sense of entitlement. And seem to think they should ALL be able to pull the best looking women. Like the incel types, and online dating, all the men irrespetive of their level of attractiveness think they are entitled to models and get angry when the really good looking women don't want them.
Which is due to being porn-sick

And when they do get a girl to go to bed with them, they expect to get what they want and the girls expects to have a bad time, all too often.
Again, due to porn.

You know the weirdest thing about porn for me? Nobody ever kisses. Now I'm pretty orally fixated (handy for a lesbian I guess) but I can't imagine having sex with anyone without kissing them.
Are teenage girls and boys not even having the snogging marathons that used to be par for the course anymore? That's sad.

Now it seems boys have a much greater sense of entitlement. And seem to think they should ALL be able to pull the best looking women. Like the incel types, and online dating, all the men irrespetive of their level of attractiveness think they are entitled to models and get angry when the really good looking women don't want them.

Plus she must also do anal, and like being choked, or whatever else he wants, because apparently her having a good time isn't important.

Is this what pissed some people off, the acknowledgement that young men's behavior and attitude has taken a turn for the far more grim than was the norm when most of us were young? Because I have friends in their 20s, and younger female relatives, and I have to say, what they report back about the men they encounter is not what I remember as being the norm at all. Something has changed, and it's not going to do us any good to pretend it hasn't.

haven't most people had a moment where some new person takes their clothes off and your first thought is...
I would call that gratitude but maybe other people would describe it as excitement.

Either way it's appreciative.

Ah
Interesting point here

You know where you will see kissing as quite standard in porn?
Gay porn (mainstream variety)

The diference is stark
If there was any evidence required that het porn is dehumanising of the women, and more about violation / degradtion than anything else
The difference in mainstream porn between the way poeple are treated is one of the things that makes it clear

Mainstream het porn is deeply misogynistic.

Can't believe my / his / her luck

Is quite standard when it comes to pulling, I think?

The idea that men shoudl NOT feel lucky when they pull a pretty girl (and vice versa) is odd. this is very much mainstream thinking.

Why I am responsible for the behviour of a bunch of men 20 years ago is confusing though.

You know the weirdest thing about porn for me? Nobody ever kisses. Now I'm pretty orally fixated (handy for a lesbian I guess) but I can't imagine having sex with anyone without kissing them.

Again, it's all a bit grim and dehumanized. Which for some young men seems to be a large part of the appeal, which is not unconnected to the porn they grew up watching. A feedback loop of grimness.

Most young women are attractive, I agree, but that's not typically how they see it when they compare themselves to the impossible ideals of today's Instagram world. Saying that your attractiveness has a bearing on how grateful your partner is to be having sex with you, isn't good but you disagree obviously.

Flying how do you feel when you pull an unattractive women ?

The incels and etc are the ones complaining that all the women go after the same few guys I thought ? Women certainly fawn over specific and beautiful so than men do.

I didn't say you couldn't be grateful for or appreciate your partner, as I've explained several times now.

I already answered the questions, I don't think all articles about sex should come with warnings attached about all the things that can go wrong.

OK so you are fine with this article.

Lots of us are not.

Glad we have got that sorted out.