Trans Widows Escape Committee 2- The Trans Widows Strike Back..

[TinselAngel]

The previous thread is nearly full, so here is a shiny new one.

I'm thrilled that this took off enough to merit a second thread.

This is a support area for women who are, or have been, in unhappy relationships with male partners who are transitioning, or exploring their "gender identity"

If you are in that position-

1. You are not alone
2. It is not a situation that you should be expected to tolerate, let alone celebrate.
3. There is always a way out, if you want it. The thread is called Escape Committee for that reason.

I am staggered by the repetitive sensitivity and ready offence about the words we use, and total denial/ignoring of the behaviour of these men. These pages outline such shocking mistreatment yet the Vanillas of this world wilfully deny and ignore it. I guess the boys stick together to dominate and control women as they have always done, just dressed in fetish gear. The irony is that these men WANT us to treat them as dead, no longer that named identity or recognizable person, never to be mentioned or seen or named. Seems to me that's a pretty robust form of social and identity DEATH. The nonsense about forbidden words and made-up words is a smokescreen to hide and silence doscussion of the scandalous treatment of women and children by these men.

I can't understand how they can id their way out of being someone's dad. It's so horribly selfish and cruel.

@QuietContraryMary I listened to the radio clip. I note the wife has "written a little book about it", I'm not interested in reading books from women who put up with this situation, but if somebody else wants to take one for the team, I'd be happy to hear about it!

TinselAngel it looks dreadful

It seems to be tips on how to make your husband look like a woman.

It starts with

"Since I had my prostate removed I have felt very feminine & want to dress up in women's clothes"

She was pleased, because he wasn't having an affair! And she also said he looked 'stunning' in her clothes.

And of course going out & spending hundreds of dollars on sexy lingerie as the very first act.

books.google.co.uk/books?id=pdaDQox4Vf8C&pg=PA12#v=onepage&q&f=false

I read a bit of it. Poor woman, she's clearly going through the same things the rest of us have, however much of a positive spin she tries to put on it.

You're welcome here Angeline when facilitating him gets too much

I have got an appointment with a counsellor on Monday. Am not going to mention his dressing just the rest of it.

That sounds like a step forward sandy

Maybe work up to that Sandy if you find the counsellor supportive.

Hi to all you great Transwidow supporters. Home Alone. Feeling calmer. Making plans while he has been away.
How do you let go after 25years with the same person?.
Feeling so isolated/alone. He has done this to me.
Is it just a massive fetish that gets them so hooked they've got to have it -(change gender) otherwise they would just 'die'

You let go gradually, and you grieve the future you thought you had together.

I remember crying a while after we split up because something had happened and I missed having his support, and my Mum saying "How can you miss him after what he's done to you". Looking back it was just a habit.

Dear transwidows,
I'm on the outside looking in. Your truth-telling, agonizing struggles, and survivor stories are a big part of why I am galvanized to fight back.
Keep supporting each other sisters

Not sure if it's appropriate to share this here. If not I will have it removed.
capturedandexposed.com/2017/09/20/the-veiled-man/

Thanks TinselAngel
Bad habit!

"Marisa (wife) did have to see a psychologist to help her adjust" (comply)

direktlajme.live/married-man-spends-76000-to-look-like-the-perfect-woman/

I'm not sure there's any comment I can make about that "transformation" that would be within talk guidelines.

I notice Fulvia doesn’t work anymore and the poor wife is supporting them both. Can’t believe you’d spend that much to look like that.

The counselling went well I think. She was very positive that she could help me build my self up a bit.
I didn't mention the dressing just his behaviour and attitude towards me.
I think it is going to help me. So thank you to the posters who suggested it.

I did self-torture myself at the weekend. I knew he would have a profile up.on a certain trans website and I went and looked.

How can they not see that when two cd's hook up they are not lesbians. Part of his profile is woe is me re relationships the rest is ooo what a cute gal I am. The pics are of him trying to look all coy...
Wtaf you are nearly 50 that coy look is for teens.

Well done, Sandy. That's so great you had a good session. You should be very proud of yourself.

Start It's not easy, you will need to grieve as Tinsel wisely said. But you will be okay, and will be stronger for it.

Hi Transwidows. Thanks moimchme.
Need a hand hold today.
DH has moved out, living fe.
Meeting up with him today to finalise separation!!
Wish me luck.
Thanks for being there.
Close family are backing me. But I've only managed to tell close friends that we are splitting but haven't said Why

Stay strong :)

Oh good luck today

Good luck. Ignore the passive aggression x

StartAgainat60 I'm not a trans widow but am hand holding. Xx

Start if you start feeling confused or conflicted by what he's saying, try to turn it into a healthy scepticism about his grasp on reality...I found a combination of anger + pity for him worked well so I didn't lose sight of my goals for the interaction and kept me relatively clear-eyed to see through the crap. But do whatever works for you. Remember: His version of events and of you aren't the accurate ones. Good luck!

Thanks to all
Feeling sick.
Have got to be strong.
Last time we spoke across the table he started sobbing and i just got Angry.
Have got to keep focused xx

Start good luck today. You are already strong for taking this on and starting to deal with it (not staying put, not falling completely to bits).
Remember these people do not think about others and live in a strange, delusional, self-absorbed bubble. It almost isn't personal, and that helped me to detach myself. There is nothing wrong with you, or your behaviour or personality. I couldn't tell friends at all, couldn't say the words. But I bet you will find many support you entirely. Approach them one at a time, in order of whom you trust most and are closest to. And today, try to stay calm and PRACTICAL; I found it really helpful to have lists/plans, and focus on the money/house/kids. The rest is terribly painful and overwhelming and needs corralling off for counselling/friends/us! GOOD LUCK. You are surrounded by this virtual circle of support and love, really.
And Sandy, well done for starting talking to someone. It will really help.