3 strikes and you're out

[spontaneousgiventime]

Sorry to start this thread but I'm livid. I'm beyond livid to be fair.

I'm now on strike two and have been warned my posting privilege is at risk.

The reason for this thread is; please don't take the new guidelines at face value. I got a strike today for calling a man who presents as a woman a name NOT on the banned list. Obviously now I can't say what it was, I am effectively gagged.

I now have six weeks of no free speech until the strikes I have are wiped - again effectively gagged.

So, you won't see me much as I will NOT refer to men who present as women as the names we are allowed to call them, so will end up banned. I will post bland banal comments that can't offend any sensibilities here and let rip elsewhere where free speech is encouraged.

PLEASE, please, watch your words or MN will use this as a reason the close the FWR board.

BeyondSceptical

Sometimes I read a post (like 'infertile woman'), and I can actually start to taste outrage. So I might briskly put the kettle on, or gaze at the sky while I gather my thoughts.

And when I re-read, sometimes I smile - I can't help it.

Because instead of being a mindfuck of mammoth proportions, or a misogynistic piece of linguist bollocks, I see it as absolute gold. A pure gift, on a plate.

I think to myself, yup. There it is.

And what these posters don't realise is these comments are surrounded by neon flashing lights. Fireworks going off all over the place drawing attention to them.

Plus people will be busy screenshotting and spreading the word. Many posters who aren't used to this site, don't even realise that what they're saying exposes them.

Which is why these comments keep on coming.

These rules definitely have a silver lining. More transactivists are becoming emboldened to post.

Just offering a few little pointers, why do you think that? How would that work? What about these statistics? is all it needs.

@BlackeyedSusan "does that mean we get to talk about Christmas? now?"

ha ha ha ha ha NO.

OP I feel for you. I notice you said you used a term that's not on the "unacceptable" list - anything that means the same will be treated that way.

I will sign up to the other forum, I think we've reached the point of no return here. I will continue here with other feminist issues though.

@Datun would you mind if I DM you the email I received today? You have a much more eloquent way with words than I and could put across the contents without actually saying what's in there.

Of course. I'll give it a go.

Thanks Datun - sent.

how the fuck is someone with autism going to navigate that lot when social situations are tricky enough as it is, and when things being black and white is more useful?

I have autism and find it confusing as heck. MN makes no allowance for autism - it's very much "off you go".

BeyondSceptical Thank you for posting those screenshots, I hadn't seen them.

I commend everyone for not losing their temper and holding on. It is just so downright offensive.

I AM SPARTACUS

Person - I think we need an edit button too. I posted something a few days ago which had a "him" in it where I knew very well I needed to say "them" or something like that; but my unconscious got the better of me. I realised straight away what I'd done and would like to have been able to change it.

I understand the potential downside of allowing people to alter their posts some time after people have replied to them but an editing window of a minute or two would be all right, wouldn't it? That's what some other forums I've used do.

Yep. People always say, listen to trans people (by which they mean trans activists). I have. That's how I became GC. I was far more willing to be accommodating before I started paying attention to what trans activists were saying.

Same here. I ignored warnings by a good friend of mine (trans-identified themselves as a matter of fact) for ages. Kept saying - oh stop being a drama-lama, it's just campus politics; it'll blow over. Eventually, and I can't really even remember why, I decided to actually take notice of the warnings and went off to investigate. Didn't like what I found - is a polite way of putting it.

Gooseberries? Ooh, I love gooseberries. Not enough things made with gooseberries in. I feel the same about blackcurrants.

Getting back to apples and oranges, maybe I'm perverse but I can't help but be somewhat amused by anyone who thinks they can lecture women about reproductive sex on a parenting site. I came across a young genderist on YouTube who thought asking women how they could prove which sex they are without a DNA test was a gotcha moment. The ignorance so many such people display is absurd, but allowing them to demonstrate that ignorance - and the accompanying misogyny - is often illuminating for lurkers.

Ahhhhh susan. Trying to sneak Christmas in June just because maryz is indisposed
But huh. A male bodied transwoman is not a woman who is unable to carry and give birth. In the same way that a female bodied transman is not a man who is unable to impregnate. It is wholly goady fuckery to be a biologically male person who joins a board called ‘mumsnet’ in the expectation of receiving consolation for not being able to be a mother.
That’s actually quite disturbing.
As is maryz’s log on issue.

I actually growled when I read some of the recent additions to this thread. I am going to have to try very hard to stay calm and rational, but I will. And practice my eyerolls.
Here's to you Spontaneous
We have to keep this debate going no matter how hard it gets!

Spontaneousgiventime, please don't go. I know you are feeling raw and I totally sympathize. But you are an important voice and I for one would miss you very much

My pink gooseberry bush from poundstretcher is still a twig after a month of watering and good wishes.
My green gooseberries are coming along nicely though.

Blackcurrants are another bush that I have recently murdered. I have no idea how I can kill so many things that will happily grow wild on their own?!

How can I prove I'm female - well quite. Growing two children myself and then pushing them out of my vag was a big clue... 🙄

Tbh given the ease with which I kill plants, I'm surprised every day that I manage to keep my DCs adequately fed and watered!

stealth as a non-athlete I am practising my hop skip and a jump over the GF, so I can talk to the amazing women on here.....

and when I feel strong, calm and ratinonal (and have time to kill) I will engage a la Datun with said GFs, asking gentle questions to lure them out.... I agree... they do not know what valuable gifts they are giving us!

Gooseberries? Ooh, I love gooseberries. Not enough things made with gooseberries in. I feel the same about blackcurrants.

Oh, Prawn. And here I thought we were friends!

OTOH, you can have all of my gooseberries and blackcurrants. That makes us friends again.

I have seen people who are not female speaking about their pain at being infertile before. I have also seen them claim to have experienced fgm. And I have seen them claim to have periods accompanied by intense pain and emotional suffering, I have seen them claim to be 'mothers', and I have seen them call women 'privileged' for being able to access abortion.

If it is accepted they are female on the basis that they identify as female then under their logic they are experience all of these things. This is where that logic takes us.

Datun has pointed something out regarding my email that has made me think. There is a quirk on the board that could have played a part in my strike. When you do a strike through you use -- at the beginning and end of the word or phrase you want to strike. However, you can't put a letter next to the - or the strike through won't work. Be careful when using forum features as that could get you into trouble.

If neccesary, I could always ask my gyny oncology surgeon for a note confirming my womanness both before and after he spent some time operating on me.
Of course he has much better things to be doing,

I love gooseberry fool.

If you're using the browser interface it's probably a good idea to get into the habit of using the preview button. In the apps, the style buttons ought to make life easier but unfortunately if you're in the habit of using a dash as punctuation you can still end up with unexpected strikethroughs (and anything discussing A level grades tends to end up as a mess of bolding - you have to learn to parse it ). Unexpected markup can be particularly troublesome in chunks of c&pd text.

I use my lappy 99.9% of the time on here. I just didn't think when I let the strike through post. Try posting woman striking out the wo and you will see what I mean and this is part of the reason I got a a strike today.

spontaneous - solidarity. We can still get things done even if not here.
Yes the goady fuckers are our best weapon. All they manage to do is put people's back up. They seem to enjoy that, but it's not getting them anywhere they want to be. Really strange that they are doing that to themselves.
Lurkers - glad to see so many of you. We were all where you were once.

I'd also appreciate details for the mysterious other place :)