"But most of them don’t look like women".
See what I mean? What does a woman 'look like'?
Women have facial hair. (Sometimes because of PCOS, sometimes because they have facial hair). Women go bald. (Sometimes its because of illness, such as something to do with the immune system, sometimes stress, sometimes something else). Women are muscular - and others are not. They are tall, fat, short, 'masculine looking', 'feminine' looking: think of the difference physically between Gwendoline Christie and Emilia Clarke (GoT actors).
And that is before we even consider the fact that what is considered 'womanly' is entirely dominated by white/western standards.
Quentin - "What we are doing is using examples like Danielle Muscato to highlight how ridiculous ..."
So the very patriarchal norms you reject for yourself, you are happy to apply to others. I know many cis women who look like Danielle Muscato (reasons for which vary). Their looks are judged by that standard - although I appreciate that very often trans exclusionary feminism entirely fails to recognise the number of cis women their praxis throws under the proverbial bus.
It is not enough to simply reject the patriarchal norms - we also have to recognise how much we have already internalised as well, and how much of our thinking is shaped by it, however unconsciously.