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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

Feminism: chat

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Original poster

The Bluestocking is open for business

999 replies

PricklyBall · 16/10/2017 21:02

I've scrolled back a few pages and I can't even find the last pub thread.

So I've taken the beer towels off the pumps, tapped a new barrel, polished the glasses, fed the goat and applied brasso to the patriarchy busting canon.

Come and join me - all tastes catered for - beer, gin, wine, cocktails, coffee and a nice cup of tea.

OP posts:

Thread gallery

BeyondNoone · 17/10/2017 14:33

Having a chat with DH about the me too hashtag, as he had no idea about the instance I mentioned on fb. We have one friend that he makes purposeful inappropriate comments to, and she responds in kind (it's an ongoing game - they've known each other since school - where they both try to make the other uncomfortable). We were discussing this and how she probably wouldn't feel able to say if it actually did make her uncomfortable, because of how women are conditioned to minimise. Apparently, despite usually being "one of the good ones", he had no idea.

BeyondNoone · 17/10/2017 14:35

Macaroon, the recent blog by David Davies (not the Brexit one) was a great summing up. With the bonus of being written by a) a man and b) an MP

OlennasWimple · 17/10/2017 15:45

I would like half a pint of mild please, because my little lady hands can't hold a big glass

Not really - though I have come across men who wouldn't buy women a pint because it was too heavy for them to hold....

FlaviaAlbia · 17/10/2017 15:56

Ah, you've met my dad OlennasWimple

I distressed him terribly when I moved out and could finally do all the unladylike things I'd always wanted to but had been forbidden to under his roof

OlennasWimple · 17/10/2017 15:59

Mine used to be like it too, Flavia - until my DSis and I grew up and he realised that the world wouldn't in fact stop turning if he bought us big drinks

Anyway, it's only 11am here, so I better stick to for a few more hours...

Original poster

PricklyBall · 17/10/2017 16:06

Saunters in and eats a cupcake!

OP posts:

NoLoveofMine · 17/10/2017 17:56

Not really - though I have come across men who wouldn't buy women a pint because it was too heavy for them to hold....

The potential infuriating sexism of this is negated by it being so laughable! I'd buy myself a pint and tell them to run along and pour themselves some tap water.

BeyondNoone · 17/10/2017 18:11

Bonus of a functioning alcoholic family member - they only buy pints for everyone, and then swap drinks when you're about halfway down and they've finished...

BeyondNoone · 17/10/2017 18:12

I actually do struggle to lift a pint now, cause of my arthritis. So I get a straw off the bar :)

QuentinSummers · 17/10/2017 18:25

Argh. Go to the end of the rape victim who killed herself thread. RAAAGE

BeyondNoone · 17/10/2017 18:47

I'm speechless.

eyebrowseyebrows · 17/10/2017 18:52

This looks like the kind of pub I like

I'm currently stuck on a train just outside my station as there is a swan on the line. I'm feeling very British as a result so I'll have a cup of tea.

Do wish the swan would hurry along though. Presumably it has no clue that it's holding up so many commuters.

I shared my own experiences of sexual assault and harassment on FB today under #metoo. Of all my male friends only one has acknowledged it. I'm hoping the rest have read it at least, I think a lot of men have no idea of the extent to which we are subjected to harassment and worse.

NoLoveofMine · 17/10/2017 19:00

I think a lot of men have no idea of the extent to which we are subjected to harassment and worse.

I definitely agree eyebrows. The test to me is the ones who'll listen, engage and try to challenge other boys/men as opposed to those who ignore, derail with "not all men", or belittle and dismiss our experiences. Sorry only one of your male friends has acknowledged it so far but it's good you know he is willing to learn and support, hopefully some of the others may have read it and taken it on board.

I hope the swan decides to stroll off and do something else soon!

ISaySteadyOn · 17/10/2017 19:10

Can I just sit quietly with a glass of something and listen to all of you. Am feeling utterly shit atm. I feel quite stupid and useless and incompetent and my children's clothes are filthy. Anyone who gets that, come sit by me.

QuentinSummers · 17/10/2017 19:12

Have a hug isay. Im sure you are none of those things. Has anything in particular happened or is it a black dog mood?

Rufustherenegadereindeer1 · 17/10/2017 19:17

When ever we go to a restaurant dh usually drives

So a coke and a lager are purchased and virtually all the time the alcohol is placed before dh

In greece i ordered a pint and he ordered a half and i took great delight in swapping them over...the waiter was most impressed

NoLoveofMine · 17/10/2017 19:23

Hopefully they often notice you swiftly swapping the drinks around to their correct positions Rufus

ISaySteadyOn

badbadhusky · 17/10/2017 19:29

Not really - though I have come across men who wouldn't buy women a pint because it was too heavy for them to hold....

Whenever we go out for a family curry, DH and I both order a large bottle of Cobra. Without fail, DH would get a pint glass and I'd get a half pint glass. I now make a point of ordering a pint glass with my beer and send it back if they bring a half.

Rufustherenegadereindeer1 · 17/10/2017 19:39

I am really obvious nolove

Suble i aint

ErrolTheDragon · 17/10/2017 19:48

I'm too small for pints. Except of tea...

Are dogs allowed in this pub? I accidentally let Colin in earlier (he's my canine alter ego from that 'let's identify as blokes thread').

BeyondNoone · 17/10/2017 19:59

I didn't know you were Colin, Errol!

ColinTheDachshund · 17/10/2017 20:09

Woof woof pork scratchings? Whiine...

PuffinsSitOnMuffins · 17/10/2017 20:11

Can I have a pint of beer please? Something dark for preference. Just done putting the youngest to bed and really want a beer! Sometimes I wish I could shrug off the way my boys behave a lot of the time with a light-hearted 'boys will be boys'. Instead when they're being a nightmare yelling / arguing / fighting / cackling with laughter while they COMPLETELY IGNORE ME I just think it's probably because I've socialised them all wrong. Aargh. Beer please.

ISaySteadyOn · 17/10/2017 20:24

Quentin, I am recovering from a wee wee epidemic that has lasted for weeks. Last Friday within the space of 5 minutes, DS had weed on the floor, DD2 weed through the duvet all the way down to the waterproof bed sheet and DD1's school rang me to tell me that she had wet herself. We lost a duvet to this.
On top of that, we keep discovering more and more evidence of neglect of our house which I can't do anything about because I am dyspraxic and so DH does it because he is the opposite. This makes me feel like I can't have ideas in my own house because if I can't do the DIY bits then I can't figure out how my ideas would work. And I just am not feeling like a person but a sort of wife and mother shape. With a black dog on her shoulder though.

SentimentalLentil · 17/10/2017 20:25

Just finished work, can I have a lager please?

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