Anyone want some light reading? Try this REddit thread - my favourite post so far is:
This is something I have very real experiences with. I've had multiple female partners who at first were extremely welcoming of being trans, but when it came down to it, made extremely cis-centric comments about what it is to be a woman, effectively erasing my womanhood, and in a lot of ways, my existence as a woman.
It has been very difficult to deal with this. To continue on, fighting against the thought that I'm some kind of poser, that I'm some kind of extreme mysoginist that is using my male body to undermine womanhood. That I'm some sort of abberation and threat to womanhood because of my male body, that I am not now and will never be a real woman.
First off I would like to start from a position of compassion, with the recognition that there is significant trauma in the female body experience that is caused by masculinity and those with a male body; not only individually, but as a historic socio-cultural experience. As much as we are women as well, the experience of women with a female body is unique.
That being said, we don't enjoy the privilege of having being born with a female body to define our womanhood, and our experience of being women is unique and valid as well. We must actively fight against and reject our inborn masculinity in order to even be seen by cis women as being worthy of being women. For a lot of people, this is HRT.
As much as HRT and physical alterations help us become the women we feel like internally, externally; our womanhood is not defined by conformity to the female ideal of womanhood, much of which is defined and shaped by historical misogyny. Our womanhood is internal, it comes from who we are, what we feel like, the deep disonnance with being a man, and masculinity. We do not get our 'membership' into womanhood from the cis female identity, but from ourselves.
This helps get me through the tough days. That thinking of myself as a woman brings me real happiness. That the more I get to know myself and undertake the sometimes violent internal ripping of ingrained masculinity from my consciousness, the more alive I feel. I go from a tin man with rusted joints, struggling to move and feel in my body to a dancer - feminine, alive, free, vibrant, and loving.
This is my personal experience and how I have dealt with what you touched on, hope it can help in some small way.
You are the woman you feel like.