Healthy living support thread for feminists

[SeraOfeliaFalfurrias]

In response to a few discussions we've had down the pub - there are some of us who are striving for better health through better diets and more exercise, but who struggle among the usual support groups where it's all about looking better rather than good health. And it certainly can be tricky as a feminist, walking that fine line between not conforming to beauty ideals through dieting and making sure you actually look after your body through a healthy lifestyle.

So here is a support thread for those of us who are trying to eat better and get more exercise.

Me, I could do with losing a bit over 2 stone to get back to a healthy weight. I had an ankle injury after running a marathon about 3 years back, and between not being able to exercise and the stress of my PhD (I'm a stress binge eater) I gained 3 stone and lost all my hard-earned fitness. I'm finally getting back on track, I've lost nearly a stone and am hitting the exercise hard again. The hardest bit has been getting back into running - while my ankle is better, my joints are really feeling the extra weight I'm carrying. It's also hard to do karate when your wobble gets in the way of you doing a good kick and you get out of breath when sparring. So I need to lose weight in order to enjoy my sports hobbies again. I'm taking it slowly, doing Slimming World but not religiously - I'm not in a hurry to lost the weight, but I also need to watch that I don't take it so slowly that it never happens!

Yesterday I ran 8km, which is really encouraging as I was still going strong at the end. Just a couple of months ago I was run/walking 5km and would have welcomed death at the end! So I feel like some kind of switch has been flipped and my body now "remembers" how to run. The down side is that both ankles are aching and stiff today.

My diet has been rather rubbish the last couple of weeks, including a few binges, and I put some pounds back on, but I'm in that good place mentally now and hopefully ready to focus on getting my body healthy again. I loved being lean and fit and athletic, and I'm not getting any younger (thoroughly middle-aged), so I feel like the window of opportunity for getting myself in a sustained state of good health without drastic measures being required is closing!

Without wanting to derail the point of this excellent supportive thread, I had a thought I wanted to run by you all...

I'm 43 and a lot less embarrassed about a lot of things than I have ever been. One of them is exercise. Yes I'm chunky, no I will never look like a model, yes I still deserve to move my body and feel good about it.

I have a friend of a similar age to me whom I've known since we were 9 and this year is the slimmest I have seen her since she was 14. She has been walking miles, has given up booze, is incredibly fit and happy and having a great time.

I honestly think (though I'm guessing) that some switch has flipped in her brain that is allowing her to exercise that is something to do with... it being ok to be seen in exercise clothes because the invisibility of being in your 40s means you won't be publicly attacked for daring to move around without looking like Pamela Anderson.

Young people do seem to be a lot less embarrassed about being big (I think - I admit again I am guessing. That is not a dig by the way, there is absolutely nothing wrong with being big and good luck to anyone who is and wears tight clothes anyway) and I hope that means that anyone who wants to can enjoy exercise. It does seem a waste of my 20s and 30s that I spent the whole time dieting, smoking, drinking black coffee because I was too pathetically inhibited to go for a run.

Or maybe I'm projecting and that's just me! Anyone else have a view on this?

There has absolutely been a switch flipped in me in the last six months or so about whether I 'deserve' to be in the gym. I'm not sure it's just about the invisibility of middle age, more that I just don't care whether people notice me or not, or what they think if they do notice, which is an attitude that comes with age I think.

Though I have a friend who is a few years older than me who hasn't got it yet. We joined the gym at about the same time, over a year ago, and she has never been on to the gym floor. She's done a couple of classes and takes her children swimming but that's it. She feels like she doesn't belong in the gym and is very self-conscious. When I mentioned a particular class I had been to she said 'but isn't that for super-fit people?'. I think I must have frowned at her a bit in confusion, because she immediately said 'not that you aren't fit...' It wasn't that (I'm not super-fit!), it was just that her perception of who was allowed to do certain things didn't fit at all with all the people I saw using the gym, i.e. completely normal people like us.

I wish I could help her see that it just doesn't matter what people think, you do your thing and don't worry about anyone else, but it's definitely a realisation that has to come from within. But it's so incredibly freeing when it does happen.

feckity, I hope your friend's switch flips too. Hiss "join ussssss" at her, at intervals.

I've never been to a fitness class that wasn't full of people of every shape, size and fitness level. It's such a shame that any woman would feel her local gym or leisure centre "isn't for her". All part of women being expected to not take up space and not appear in public unless they appear suitably decorative.

As for me today, I really pushed myself at Combat and Pump this evening and feel very tired but strong and awesome. Despite the wobbly bits, I actually like seeing myself all pumped up and sweaty!

And I think I might get DH to put the scales away somewhere high for a month of so, so I won't be able to reach them!

Interesting Magick. I'm not sure if I've ever felt I didn't belong in the gym. My mother is an athlete, she coached men's university level basketball and is currently with Qatar's Olympic Commitee helping with their school activity programs. She doesn't look like a super model and she's never been what anyone would call skinny (she's half Native American and despite what Pocahontas would have you believe, they are not naturally slim people), and she's ALWAYS insisted that my brother and I be active, so I've never thought I didn't belong in a gym or exercise clothes. Also my attitude in the gym is I'm here to work out don't fucking talk to me, please refer to my bitch face if you think I'm up for a conversation about the weather.

My issues have always been food related, and I think the flipped switch for me is that I deserve to enjoy life and food and not starve myself or think that I don't deserve to enjoy a hamburger because I'm overweight. Not feeling guilty about everything I put in my mouth is a really hard thing.

"please refer to my bitch face if you think I'm up for a conversation about the weather. "

SNORT!

Missed the early train today because I'm trying to have breakfast at home - for a long time i was grabbing something from Pret which just means expensive, unnecessary and not even that lovely calories on the run. Today I had two chunks of fresh bread and a Banana, sitting down - much more enjoyable!

Noone seems to try to chat in my gym, everyone's just going about their business. Mind you I have headphones in the whole time so noone's likely to attempt chat with me, but I've never seen much interaction, only people who have clearly come together - sharing a PT or something.

I had a good session at the gym yesterday, running on the treadmill felt good. I was able to let my mind drift instead of a constant stream of, -how much have I done?-When I can I have a break?-Almost finished thank god...
I always know I'm getting better with the running when I can think about something else other than the running :)

I was starving yesterday afternoon though, so didn't do to well there. Not a good sign if I get to dinner and I'm not actually hungry because of all the snacking.

Not sure what'll I'll get a chance to do today, I might try to shred later if dd2 is willing to entertain herself.

I've got one really chatty person at the gym. I hate going there and seeing him. I know my work out will be blown by him blathering on about his job, etc. I think its because I'm the only other person there who speaks fluent English, and no one from his job does, so all his conversation builds up till he see's me.

I've got shoulders today. Looking forward to trying some new exercises.

Felt really tired yesterday from the swim, had been planning to go on my exercise bike in front of GBBO but sat on the sofa to watch instead! Feel much better today though, so maybe will do that tomorrow!

Stayed up late last night with DH enjoying some wine and tv, as that is the last time I will ever be able to do so during a weeknight because starting tomorrow I will be up at 5:30 am every weekday getting DS ready for school. I am tired and I had 2 egg McMuffins on the way to work today. YAWN!!! Still going to go do something at the gym for leg day though.

About 50 mins on exercise bike this morning, well done me!

Well done indeed Yonic.

I've fallen off the wagon a bit in the last few days. Partly because now I'm so close to DD starting school (tomorrow!) I've been kinda waiting for all that free time to go the gym, rather than book her in to the creche or go in the evening. I'll be there tomorrow for sure. And I've been better with the snacks today than the last couple of days.

It's scary how it can suddenly feel like your mindset has changed and it's going to be a big deal to get back into it. I was only at the gym on Monday! Sheesh.

Not feeling so good today. Tiring work at present!

I'm struggling a bit with motivation too-also have a busy period in work and have picked up a cold so feel a bit like death. Feeling ill always makes me crave stodge so I'm avoiding the tape measure/scales for a while.

Never mind. Back on track next week hopefully.

Too much work to get to the gym today but did at least cycle to an errand and back!

Hello everyone. This thread had dropped off Threads I'm On so it's definitely been too long since I last posted!

My head is still in a "healthy" place, doing lots of exercise and mostly eating well. But I am starting to think "a bit of this won't matter" far too often! I need to keep to more reasonable portions of calorie-dense food. And I definitely need to drink more water. I think I've said before that I find myself craving sweet things when I'm not properly hydrated.

How is everyone else doing?

Cannot believe I missed most of this lovely day to work!

Walking up to collect kids now so at least some fresh air!

Did 40 mins exercise bike in front of GBBO. Was supposed to be 45 but I let myself off given I'd done a real bit of cycling earlier.

I didn't make it through my month of no booze though. Had a small glass of wine last night.

Thought I'd share this....

Can I join (late)? I used to post on these boards a lot but took an extended break and name changed.

I have 8 kg or so to lose to be a happy, healthy weight. I would call it baby weight but he's nearly 1.5.

I struggle to find time to exercise. The baby is always with me, DH works away a lot (and changeable days of the week) and my pelvic floor is not what it was pre three kids. I am pondering that (suggestions welcome!).

Diet is basically ok at meals, except far too much bread. Snacking is my nemesis.

I would like to feel strong and energetic for my.girls. The oldest is 6 and I want to really focus on modelling good body image.

My body is trying to decide if it wants to succumb to the flu or not. Sore throat and exhausted, but not quite "sick" yet. Urgh.

Also, skinny jeans must go out of fashion. I mean MUST.

I buy M&S jeans and I don't care. They fit, they're jeans.

Love M&S jeans. I have a pair of "boyfriend" jeans that I've been wearing for years. But I went on Thursday and they only had skinny jeans! And then I went to American Eagle (back in my 20's I remember they had good jeans) and again, only skinny jeans and jeggings. To make matters worse they didn't carry a size over US size 8! Most of what they had was 00. I don't think I could fit my arm in a 00!

Oh that's pants!