Female body hair / husband- help?

[wishfulthinking1]

Since the birth of my son I've considered feminist issues much more deeply- particularly inspired by 'hair:not the musical', I've begun considering hair removal as a choice- and have chosen not to at the the moment.

My lovely husband (and he really is lovely) is struggling with this- says he doesn't find it attractive / is embarrassed when we go swimming etc- he doesn't mean to be ignorant, but he's really struggling with it.

I'm trying to find something for him to read that could help him get his head around it. Most internet searches come up with articles along the lines of 'eww, gross, if your partner loved you, she'd shave blah blah'.

Does anyone have any advice?
Thanks

How many men have long hair vs women? 2-3 centuries ago, aristocratic men had long hair. Now they don't. Is that evolution or societal change, I wonder?

I don't care if you shave your legs; I do too. But to say the decision is taken in isolation from the society you live in is simply incorrect.

Ok fakebook. Extensive research in this area is wrong and you're right.

I gotta say, the nest argument is a new one, though.

Unfortunately the nest is of no use to me because it is formed in the bath plug hole, but other than that I think fakbook's explanation makes perfect sense

Good. I'm glad you all agree I'm right. That ends the discussion then doesn't it? Have a good evening. God forbid anyone question your views. .

As it happens I do like the smooth feeling on my legs and my DH shaves parts of his body that he likes to remain smooth. No one has conditioned us into thinking this.

50 years ago very few women took off all their pubic hair. Now many women do. It isn't healthy, so unlikely to be a natural instinct and seems to have coincidentally happened at the same time as porn deciding it improved the view.

Or do you think humans have suddenly evolved a new need to take off fanjo hair too?

People can question any views, we can question your bullshit science views too

Given your first post accused people of snarling, Fakebook...

I am madly in love with the idea of using our body hair for nests! But then wouldn't we be furrier than men?

Feathering your nest. Nest building. Nest eggs... (The mind boggles)

Victorians used to make jewellery out of hair.

So what are people actually doing in the 21st centuary - apart from nest making - with their naturally/instinctively removed pubes, arm and leg hair etc.

Forget about penis beakers. It's pube pot time!

some people spin and knit with their pets' hair?

head hair (note this is crochet from what i can tell, not knitting)

"It isn't healthy"

Rubbish. When removed properly, there is nothing unhealthy about it. I like the feeling of being shaven down there - nothing to do with porn and nothing to do with my desire to please anyone else. Perfectly healthy when done properly. If you shave or wax incorrectly then yes there is a chance of inflamed hair follicles which collect bacteria. But when done properly there is nothing unhealthy about it.

Fakebook it's really odd to go on a discussion and say "I have a mad theory with no backup therefore all your well researched ideas are wrong." Would you go on a discussion about racism and do the same thing?

I grew all my body hair. It wasn't on display because of the clothing I choose to wear ( so societal pressure not a factor). I just didn't like how it looked on my body -much like how I don't like how blonde/ long hair/long nails/ high heels look.Purely personal choice. I have no problem with seeing body hair anyone.

Surely being inhibited/ feeling uncomfortable about any aspect of your body that you are at liberty to change and doing nothing isn't actually feminist in essence? The focus on woman as object is still a factor here, probably more so if you are using your body to make a statement about something that really doesn't matter and most people couldn't give a rat's arse about.

There are far more important things to focus on with respect to women's rights than choices over body hair. Just my two cents!

Again, just plain wrong waffle. Why do you think we have thick pubic hair but relatively thin hair everywhere else? It's not there by accident, it serves a purpose just like our skin and eyelashes and removing it is a bad idea.

pube removal is unhealthy, doesn't it increase your risk of STIs?

not pubic lice though, they must mourn the deforestation of their natural habitat

I wouldn't personally mess with my luxuriate bush though. I think a hairy minge feels nice and looks great.

mitchy that was on the museum of curiosity on R4 the other day. in the NL the natural history museum called for people to send in pubic lice because apparently the incidence of them has decreased due to more people removing pubic hair

There is no proven reason that pubic hair actually serves a purpose. There are a few theories, none of which have much substance. No proof whatsoever that it serves a purpose.

How can you blame society for a woman wanting to remove her bodily hair? In the animal kingdom, often the females pluck their own hair/feathers to make nests. How do you know that the real reason for a woman wanting to remove body hair isn't because it's an animal instinct?

You'd have to go a LONG way up our evolutionary tree to find an ancestor that made nests, if there is one at all. Plus removing body hair has only become "the norm" in the last few decades.

All behaviour beyond basic survival is conditioned. There is no reason whatsoever for women to feel embarrassed by their body hair. The only reason they do feel embarrassed, liks the OP, is because society tells them hairy legs ard unacceptable ln women (but fine on men). If it was a genuine choice lots of women would have hairy legs. As it is, very few women don't shave.

^^ this in spades.

Where do all these ideas of hair removal come from then fakebook??
Porn and hair removal is a really good example of the way that these ideas are foisted upon women under the banner of supposed choice.
I mean I used to shave because I thought it was the done thing and expected of me, then I started to question why and how we have got the point where looking pre-pubescent is considered desirable for adult women and could only come up with one answer.

I don't believe hair removal of the type done today would ever have become common if women had had completely free rein over their appearance with no input from men at all.

Luxuriant even.

well there is evidence that removing your pubes increases your chances of certain STIs anyway so they are good for something

it doesn't matter what purpose body hair serves now

the fact is that a huge proportion of women in the western world remove their body hair, and a huge proportion of men don't. and there is no good reason for this situation beyond socialisation