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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

Feminist pub no 12: The Bluestocking Returns, this time with goats!

999 replies

YonicScrewdriver · 05/10/2014 09:18

Welcome!

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PumpkinGordino · 22/10/2014 17:28

thanks everyone, i can't tell people in RL much yet until it's firmed up, so it's nice to get the congratulations here

good luck BISS. you will be all strong and supple

DoctorTwo · 22/10/2014 17:57

Congrats on the new job Pumpkin. I wonder how Annie got on in her interview.

OutsSelf · 22/10/2014 18:29

Alright you lot. I've been slightly snowed of late, no time for owt really. I'm going to FiL on Saturday though, it'll be like a holiday! I hadn't planned to take any kind of pan, though - will it still count?

Dragonlette · 22/10/2014 18:34

Yes, out. it still counts if you don't take a pan. I prefer a holiday where I don't have to do any cooking (never get it) so tend not to think of pans or knives.

UptoapointLordCopper · 22/10/2014 18:49

Because do tell about the ballet class! I have secret longing for singing lesson. But already do piano lesson ...

Outs Nobody takes pans to ILs. Shock Grin

Dragonlette · 22/10/2014 18:55

I've always fancied ballet as well. I did have lessons briefly as a child but I'm not ballet shaped, more elephant shaped Halloween Blush.

DemisRoussos · 22/10/2014 19:59

Congrats, Pumpkin! (Now have urge to change nn to Honey Bunny, lol)

MyEmpireOfDirt · 22/10/2014 22:40

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

OublietteBravo · 23/10/2014 09:15

Well done Pumpkin - I'm so pleased it all worked out for you. Halloween Grin

Haven't really been keeping up with the pub this week as I've been doing family stuff. However, I have a day to myself today (DH has taken the kids to Thorpe Park for the day - I'm still all theme parked out after our summer holiday).

I've just finished 30 mins of circuits, so I think the next stop is the local cafe for coffee and porridge and plotting what to do with the rest of my day.

vezzie · 23/10/2014 11:01

Well done, Pumpkin.

Ooubliette - enjoy your day off!

More musings on the theme above touched on by Gone Girl.

There are at least 2 works of Great Literature that I can think of that centre around a trial for rape where it was clearly a false accusation. In each of the books there is a race element that morally (if not legally) vindicates the accused (to the reader, if not in the courts of the story). By extension, the accuser is portrayed as at least weak and unfairly privileged; or perhaps her name is thoroughly blackened.

The two I am thinking of are of course To Kill A Mockingbird and Passage to India.

Are there lots of these books? Is it almost a sub genre? Or is just because these two are regarded as so Great and Important and Moral and Taught In Schools (because of the way they take on the race issue - ways that to the modern reader are by no means unproblematic in themselves by the way) - that it just feels wearily familiar that a whole plot can be predicated on false accusations of violent abuse?

Are there many books about true rape accusations where nothing happens to the rapist? Yes, in the sense that normal realistic fiction will portray sexual relationships where a certain amount of rape occurs, within and outside of marriages, but how often is it an acknowledged outrage that drives the plot? (except for the magnificent Veronica Mars)

I know asking these questions in a simplistic quantitative way doesn't really tell us much but I can't help thinking that there are a lot more Big Serious Stories about the stuff that doesn't happen much, than about the stuff that does.

It feels like the popularity of those Great Works of Fiction, in which men of colour are morally vindicated by discrediting white women, have pushed women to the back of the queue for justice. You couldn't possibly argue in favour of a racist conviction of an innocent man. So it elides the whole issue which is that rape is more about gender than it is about race. By turning it in to a race issue, you artificially pit (white? not necessarily) women against men of colour (when justice is owed to all) and make a thousand conversations not able to take place for a hundred years.

It's almost as if they were doing it deliberately.

It's like being able to avoid the accusation that you are whipping your dog by saying "Oh I wouldn't bother with that now, don't forget I'm whipping the servants too"

PumpkinGordino · 23/10/2014 11:14

vezzie i saw the film last night. it did not alleviate my concerns.

there are some really interesting insights into how this woman is used by others for their own ends, and how she has to play the character they have designated for her. but that is overridden by the woman as manipulator theme

PuffinsAreFicticious · 23/10/2014 11:42

Great news Pumpkin!

My DS is home from Iraq.

YonicScrewdriver · 23/10/2014 11:55

Yay!

OP posts:
DemisRoussos · 23/10/2014 12:40

That's great news Puffins!

UptoapointLordCopper · 23/10/2014 12:53

Puffins Smile Smile Smile

PumpkinGordino · 23/10/2014 13:26

must be lovely having him home puffins!

SconeRhymesWithGone · 23/10/2014 13:27

Puffins Great news!

TessOfTheAmityvilles · 23/10/2014 14:48

That's fantastic news Puffins.

Congratulations Pumpkin.

PumpkinGordino · 23/10/2014 14:49

i cannot get used to being called pumpkin! i might ahve to change back before hallowe'en at this rate

WhatWouldFreddieDo · 23/10/2014 16:06

LordCopper I was just about to say you must take sharp knives and pan on holiday, then thought must get on with tea and have cut pinkie with v sharp knife Hmm so while i sit with hand above head i can tell you that we always take knives, cafetiere and pan

TerrariaMum · 23/10/2014 16:56

That is wonderful, Puffins. You must be pleased.

Can I ask if the pub does tea with lemon and honey? DD1 has brought back a bug from nursery and I have come down with it. I suppose this is a rite of passage but it is a very unpleasant one

PumpkinGordino · 23/10/2014 16:57

would you like a dash of whisky in that terrariamum or is it a bit early?

DemisRoussos · 23/10/2014 16:59

Hello all, am stuck at home with poorly and infectious children Hmm so have been looking at deed poll service websites with a view to changing my surname from DHName to MyOldName-DHName.

It seems I have a choice: either hyphenate the two surnames or not. Those of you who have used two surnames, are there any reasons why I ought to preference hyphenating over not hyphenating? Does it make any difference?

UptoapointLordCopper · 23/10/2014 17:03

We are having pizzas and garlic bread for tea today, so no sharp knives or pans needed. Tired ...

Can't help with names... Didn't change mine...

BecauseIsaidS0 · 23/10/2014 17:21

I hyphenate my two Spanish surnames because otherwise everyone thinks that my first surname is my middle name, and things get really confusing really quickly.

About the ballet class last night...it was SO MUCH FUN! Luckily, I'm reasonable strong and flexible from all the yoga I do so that wasn't too bad. The real challenge were my two left feet Grin