Feminist Pub IX. Newbies and regulars welcome - pop your cognitive dissonance down outside and have a gin.

[LRDtheFeministDragon]

Right, thought I'd better start a new pub. I warn you, my knowledge of Roman numerals conks out shortly after this one, so either buffy will have to start the next thread, or we'll have to go Arabic.

Everyone is welcome in - if you want to chat, or just jump in with a question/link/gin, please do. Especially if it's too small for a thread or you don't feel up to thread-starting.

The old thread has, at my count, about 9 posts to go, and it was here: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/womens_rights/2126791-Feminist-Pub-VIII-not-as-prolific-as-the-Swaggerers-but-there-are-cushions-and-consciousness?

We were just chatting about feministy light reading, and will doubtless meander onto other topics shortly.

Amy Poehler is an American comedian and is very feminist and very good at getting the point across. I like her a lot.

This should cheer everyone up: Feminist Barbie

ah, so clearly i should know who she is!

CaptC I agree. The nail varnish is one thing, but the only thing that will eradicate rape is that we stop rapists, which means involving men and making them see that when a woman says no she should be respected. Or if she is too drunk/drugged she should be placed in the recovery position and allowed to sleep it off.

The alternative is for women to wear that sheath that clamps on to a rapist's cock, giving away the fact he's a rapist. I prefer the education option tbh.

That fucking nail polish, it's all over Facebook.

4 men in university a place where rape is rife.

SO they come up with a way to one profit on it and two put the onus on the woman to avoid rape. With a poorly thought out product to boot.

If they really gave a fuck about women bring sexually assaulted they could probably start an anti rape campaign for the other men they are probably friends with.

Amy Poehler is awesome! She's got a "Smart Girls" Facebook thingie that I subscribe to, which is just amazing. She puts her money where her mouth is.

About the nail varnish...I feel conflicted. While I agree that we really shouldn't put the onus on women to not get raped, I do have a friend who was assaulted by a stranger who dropped GHB in her drink at a bar in London .

May I interject with some personal positivity? DD1 has just turned 9 and is starting to develop the first early signs of puberty - two tiny armpit hairs and breast buds. But she's so excited about these changes she's going through, keeps showing me her armpit hairs etc and it's just wonderful. We talk very openly about bodies, the changes they go through, sex (at an age-appropriate level of course). And I'm just so excited to be able to share it with her, to answer her questions honestly and openly. She had some questions about her anatomy after seeing diagrams in her book on growing up, babies etc. So we spent some time with a mirror this evening naming all the part of her genitalia.

When I was her age, my mother refused to tell me anything, I had no idea what my "bits" comprised and when my breasts started to grow I thought I had cancer. When I was around 12 I finally made her tell me about menstruation since I had heard from other girls to expect it.

I'm so pleased my DDs and I are open with each other now, and I hope they continue to feel they can discuss anything with me as it all gets far more complicated into their teens.

How lovely for your daughter, Annie

I must have been mid twenties before I actually looked at my bits which now seems incredibly bizarre and yet I still can't shake the feeling that it was a bit of a seedy thing to do.

That's brilliant Annie! So much better than having a pack of Dr White's single mattresses thrust at me and a stern warning not to tell my brother anything. Ah, the good old days!

Evening all. Brilliant response to Rhiannon LC LRD I am angry, too.

Actually I've been weeping and shaking about the Rotherham case, dear God, 1400 children? A massacre of hope. And so cross that we're all worried it's racial, it's just more male violence against not-men as far as I can tell. I don't have the strength to start a thread about it but ranted massively on Facebook about the silence of men, and unsurprisingly most men I know have been pretty much silent about it. Really glum about this.

The end of my job draws near so I really could cheer up. The world is so toxic, sometimes, I find it hard to draw the boundary between never getting out of bed again and just shutting off, watching Glee and pretending the world makes sense.

annie, that's brilliant - it's great to think she'll be able to avoid so much of the bullshit/fear that goes with the culture of silence some of us grew up with. Awesome.

outs - thanks. And yes, indeed. It's just frightening. I do find I can't give headspace to everything out there - sometimes I just shut off and I don't even read the news sources I know will be feministy and full of well-judged outrage because even those get to me. I don't think this is a bad thing, I think it's necessary self-preservation. So a bit of Glee is good!

Do you have plans for when your job ends?

Oh, sorry just, cross posted. Will PM as not supposed to promote it on here.

Could you PM me a link too, please, LRD?

I know you aren't supposed to promote blogs, but I think you are allowed to post it in response to ongoing and relevant discussions. Or is that not the rule . Will check it out later LRD.

I'm just being over-cautious, I think. I have a habit of writing it in response to stuff on MN, sometimes (like now) stuff I posted, which makes it all a bit circular. Anyway, since you say:

readingmedievalbooks.wordpress.com/2014/08/28/yes-im-angry-but-that-doesnt-make-me-illogical-on-victim-blaming/

Thanks for posting the link! Totally going in my feed.

Thanks!