I don't know why I bother.....anyone else the same?

[mcmooncup]

I use Facebook. Put up funny posts, pictures...bla bla bla.

Everytime I post something I usually get about 30-40 likes.

Yet EVERYTIME I post something vaguely feminist. Blank. Zero. Occasional like.

I find it so depressing. Today I have posted about International Women's Day and linked to the letter in the Guardian.


How do we break down this wall of silence?

Why do people not want to be associated with 'ranty feminists'?

Our communication seems to be very isolating, even though it's not meant to be.

Qu's I ask myself....

Why can people not see what I can see?
Is the harm done to them so 'normal' that they can't see it?
Are they scared of being ostracised into this rad fem group if they speak out?
Are they afraid of losing their families/jobs/attractiveness to males?

I just wondered if we could have a discussion and try and learn what is it that non feminists hear when they hear a feminist talking. It might help us improve our communication.

[FastidiaBlueberry]

Oh yes McMooncup.

Absolutely.

Very well described.

Sometimes I wish I'd kept my head in the sand.

[MTSgroupie]

OP - You just don't see it, do you? The last page of this thread is exactly why your non-feminist friends blank out your feminist FB postings.

[mcmooncup]

You'll have to explain MTS.

What I see on this thread is non-feminists come on, say ewwww you are all ranty horrid but don't explain anything more. I could make sweeping generalisations about non-feminists based on this thread-I.e. that there is no substance to their hatred of feminists, but I'd really prefer to hear which parts of feminism actually wind you up.
So plllllllease do...... Please.

[mcmooncup]

And when I say which parts of feminism wind you up.....I mean feminist concepts....not what individual feminists like myself may have said that wind you up.

I am left wing but think ed milliband is annoying, but fundamentally agree with his principles. So if you find what I as an individual feminist has said annoying that is not the same as finding all feminists annoying.

[SplitHeadGirl]

Fastidia, it is funny but in a way, I actually LIKE how some men resent me for not caring about what they think of me. It feels like a small victory, for me but also for women out there who are taken for granted by men everywhere. I also think it is in men's interests not to assume women care about their opinions.

[Darkesteyes]

mcmooncup can i add something to your list upthread.

Dont try to police or control womens sexuality.

[mcmooncup]

Of course....but I've a feeling MTS or anyone else will not answer the questions anyway.

I hope I'm wrong.

[FastidiaBlueberry]

Splitheadgirl - yes.

I like it too.

The nicer ones are just a bit unsettled and non-plussed, the wankers are unsettled and angry - they don't know why they're angry or even that they are, but it comes out in a hostile attitude. I suspect it's all really, really unconscious.

[FastidiaBlueberry]

Is MTS saying that she find it completely outre not to care about what men think?

[SplitHeadGirl]

Fastidia my favourite thing to do is keep talking - not louder or faster, and not batting an eyelid - when a man tries to interrupt me like he hasn't uttered a word. The look on his face is priceless!!! There are so many ways to let men know that you value your own opinion far more than theirs!!!

[MTSgroupie]

OP - I obviously can't assert that all feminists are annoying. All I can say is that all the feminist that I have met were annoying.

Don't take it personally. I also find annoying anybody who continually go on about socialism and religion.

[MTSgroupie]

.. Split's post is a perfect example of why I find feminist post a bit of a turn off. This constant 'men are twats' argument gets sooo boring after a while.

[HairyHandedTrucker]

being constantly told your sex is inferior is annoying, you're right mts

[HairyHandedTrucker]

op, I sit there sometimes and wonder why no one else is furious. since moving back to the states and watching my government take a fucking time machine back to 1950 to erode all of our rights. I want to cry. I think of moving back to the UK and read the fucking AARSE thread. I lived in a garrison town and felt the misogynistic attitudes but didn't realise the extent of what was bubbling away below the surface. I read about the brave women in NI and the risk they are taking in signing that letter... and we're "the lucky ones" we have equality in our countries. Apparently

[Bessie123]

I think a lot of feminist posts sound proselytising and irrelevant to people's daily life. They are ranty and annoying and outdated. Until you realise they are not and there is plenty of sexism around, limiting and destroying women.

[mcmooncup]

OK MTS, but again you don't say why you find feminist arguments annoying.

No-one has said men are twats.

Which part of feminism do you not agree with?

[AnyFucker]

MTS, how did you know which of all the women you have ever met in your life are feminists and which are not ? You say every single feminist you have ever met has been "annoying"

What about the women who didn't annoy you you, but were also feminists?

Your sweeping statements weaken your argument, such as it is

[MTSgroupie]

Any - Ok. I'll qualify that. All the self declared feminists that I have met have been annoying.

[FloraFox]

All the self-declared non-feminists I have met have been annoying or twats.

[AnyFucker]

I would find people who on an initial, superficial meeting "declared" themselves to be anything annoying actually.

MTS, I think you mean you have met a couple of feminists that you didn't take to. Shit happens. No reason to dismiss a whole bunch of people.

[slug]

Do you find feminists annoying because they point out things you'd rather not think about?