radio ad for DV

[ILoveItWhenYouCallMeBoo]

not sure if it is broadcast on uk station sbut i am in NI and the ad is either a man or a woman making excuses for the bruises and injuries they have (there are two ads by the same campaign.) things like "i walked into a door, she didn't mean it etc)

but the voiceover goes on to say that "domestic violence only stops when you report it"

now i know these ads are aiming to encourage anyone who is victim of or suspects DV to pick up the phone, but i can't help thinking that it makes out the victim or suspector (sp?) are responsible for letting it continue.

shouldn't these ads be directed at the abusers? surely they can script the voiceover to be directed at the abuser? something to get into their heads that makes them feel guilty and encourages them to stop and seek help for anger management and support for their victims.

I don't think that's the case for a moment, but it's what you believe and nothing is going to change that. The stats on male victims are a lot closer to females than I thought ( though it is a simple stat and not very sophisticated), and to ignore it isn't beneficial to anyone.
night.

oh god i have actually just looked at the link to the poster. the one of a man with a black eye and a woman brandishing her stilleto! FFS!

For me the whole issue is that male violence towards women is gendered based and a result of male power and privilege. Woman to man violence, whilst it is violence between people of different genders, it does not occur as a result of gender inequality and therefore requires a totally different response. that's why i think it is soooo damaging to lump it all in together as this 'campaign' seems to have done

we read things differently.
night again.

yes, that happens a lot doesn't it

woman twats man with stiletto heel, just because she can

I don't think so

I don't agree. I don't think that any 'simple understanding' of anything is not questionable. Humans are not simple.

I am only quoting from the University of Google here but I would agree with the 'sizable minority' description of female to male DV but the seriousness of the resulting injuries tends to be quite substantially less.

I'm sorry I don't have a quote from TFM tonight. Probably there isn't an exact quote - it's the overall view of the concept of femininity sidelining real women and what they really feel and do, in favour of a marketing concept and commercial version of Freudian theory.

This is what the Scottish Givernment says about it:

Police statistics evidence that year on year there has been an increasing number of men reporting experiencing domestic abuse. 6,165 men reported being abused by a female partner to the police in 2007/08. These figures are small in comparison to the number of incidents where women were the victims and whilst it is recognised that women are more likely to experience repeated abuse and over a longer time, and the severity of the abuse is likely to be greater

Its not just about the numbers you know. This for me is the most significant issue: 'it is recognised that women are more likely to experience repeated abuse and over a longer time, and the severity of the abuse is likely to be greater'

there is also research to suggest that men overstate the threat posed the the violence women perpetrate against them, whilst women do the opposite.

female to male violence is a totally different issue to male violence against women. And whilst i am not saying it is of no importance, i just don't see it as being very relevant in discussions about men's domestic violence towards women

I'm not intending to use Betty Friedan's work in the service of 'women do it too'. I'm intending to use it explaining that my approach to feminism is bringing women's real lives into view, as opposed to the fake lives and feelings that were designed for women, mostly by men as part of capitalism.

Women's real lives, in my view, are sometimes going to include crimes and violence. Which take place in a context of gender discrimination. I don't agree that violence committed by women is not relevant in the feminism section - I would rather it were discussed here, where context is more likely to be discussed as well.

agree dittany WRT the sexing up of a woman hitting a man. you are right, it is a male fantasy. who the fuck conmes up with this shit???

it shouldn't be too difficult to guess who comes up with this shit...

I'm using my own internal logic because I can, I guess. I'm not disagreeing that the substantial majority of DV is perpetrated by males against females. I'd also agree witht the posters further up and with you that it's frustrating, and typical, that the advert using the minority situation, with the 'sexier' situation of the stiletto-wielding woman, is used as an example with the newspaper article, presumably because the poster showing male violence against women is just too ho-hum, dull and typical for them to use.

I just don't think that female violence against men is irrelevant, or such a tiny minority that it's not worth looking at. Nothing about women's lives is not worth looking at to me. Why is that not feminist?

i do wonder (and fear) how far those ads go towards encouraging men to make counter allegations / shift the blame etc onto the woman / victim. And basically use the 'men can be victims too' line as another means to exert control

totally agree radio and ditt WRT last two points.

does anyone mind if i use some of your points in my comment to website? i will of course not if anyone has a problem with that.

that ad is a bloody disgrace. looks like NI still have a long way to go

radio, you have no idea!! teh NI i know is still in the 1950's

What's wrong with making an ad with female > male violence it is by no means rare and the vast majority of ads and support goes towards female victims anyway why all the outrage about 1 ad for a problem that does exist although not as much as the opposite and as I have already stated before ad campaigns reflect this.

As to the stiletto heals it's not about being sexy I really don't see anything sexy about it at all it's just shoes with a sharp edge that can be used as a weapon.

Are you radio saying that there should be no ads for male domestic violence victims?

saltatrix if ou really can't see the problem with the heels then i think you should stick around feminism to find out why it is so wrong.