Porn

[msrisotto]

Tentative!

Um, the way I see it is that a lot of porn (I have heard) is appallingly violent and degrading for women. This stuff, ideally wouldn't exist and should be banned (how, I don't know, but ideally).

However, the porn that I have seen or enjoyed is not. I wouldn't enjoy porn that is degrading.

So, why is all porn bad? (in some people's opinions?) If it isn't degrading and is equal in its approach, for the entertainment of others, then I don't see any harm.

Is the argument that you don't get the 'good' porn without the bad?

Don't flame me please, I really want this to be a considered conversation.

Carmen, your post makes me thing of the "casting couch" and things women AND men will do to achieve their dreams. Marilyn Monroe apparently "went there" and achieved her probable dream of everlasting fame! The price was a BIT high though.

TBE... see my latest post. What makes sex different from any other kind of employment?

Why is drawing a contract up that involves sex different from drawing any other contract up? Why should a woman (or man) not be allowed to sign such a contract? Why should they be exempt from normal legal penalties for breaking the contract?

Sex is ultimately about human bonding and procreation.

Given that no form of contraception is 100% effective, porn can result in pregnancy. That is a pretty extreme result of a business transaction.

Good summary, TBE

See, you're all being tongue-in-cheek about it but I think it's a really important question. Why IS sex different in that it deserves important rules?

Personally, I don't get it. I've done things I feel shitty about in the name of employment. I don't think sex is particularly different. Is it about emotions? Physical touch? What? I honestly don't get it. Doctors have to stick their hands up people's arses. Soldiers get hurt and suffer violence. Marathon runners have to overcome physical pain and emotional barriers. Actors have to have their looks judged and their personality suppressed in order to be what the director wants them to be portrayed as. Salesmen and politicians have to be economical with the truth.

Why is sex different?

I think I missed the Porn Law 101 lecture, Dittany. Glad you took notes for me.

Usually because sex is the last thing on the table. I like my job. I want to be promoted. If my boss said to me that if I shagged him I would get my promotion, would that be right? I might freely choose to do that because the rewards outweigh the effort ( though my boss is pretty unsexy). But has he not exploited me in someway?

Not all porn is ten cocks and bukkake though as has been said numerous times. Not all porn is wrong at all. I do think that some women may be cajoled in to working within the sex industry but it is not all extreme. Dittany is saying she doesnt think anyone should be doing any kind of sex work at all. What does this mean no page 3? No men with their tops off? If you think like that you could think anything was objectification.

TBE, yes I can. I can see exactly what you're saying.

But I'm questioning why we feel like that.

What if you walk off stage in the middle of the play because you have a sudden feeling that you're being degraded?

What if you walk out of your sales job because you realise you just sold someone something they couldn't afford?

Reasons why sex is obviously different from writing a novel or running a marathon:

1. I would be prepared to write a novel with my Dad.
2. People don't abduct children, make them write novels, and then murder them.
3. Women aren't trafficked all over the world so that they can write novels.
4. Forcing someone to write a novel against their will is a very unusual crime.
5. I would run a marathon in front of children.
6. When you apply to become a teacher, you don't have a criminal records check to see if you have exposed vulnerable people to your marathon running.
7. You can't get pregnant and bring new life into the world as a result of running a marathon.
8. Marathon running is seldom a major part of people's adult relationships.

@ sexy marathon running.

'Let's heat it up a bit tonight, darling. What do you fancy?'

'ooh...how about running 26 miles?'

It is a stupid analogy.

Sex should not be a job. Unless you are having very unpleasant, meaningless, souless sex, it is about making a connection with another person.

Maybe that connection is merely physical, and that is fine. I have had enough casual sex to not feel that you have to love someone to do it, but I do feel that sex should always be mutually respectful because it is dealing with people's intimate body parts. It involves trust that someone is not going to hurt you or carry on if you don't want them to.

Doing it as a financial transaction means that the trust and respect are not part of the package. Plus the baby issue, as I mentioned before as well as the disease issue, which Ditanny has touched on previously.