50 shades of grey is a pile of shite.

[EccentricaGallumbits]

Im only a couple of chapters in. please tell me it improves or i'll have to ditch it.

No definitely not a giggle!

Oh dear Lord. I bought this book on the recommendation of my friend, who raved about it being brilliant and very raunchy etc etc. It's the worst example of writing I have ever come across. It ignores all the advice ever given to writers; "avoid repetition, avoid cliches, use natural dialogue". How the hell did this book ever reach publication?

Will Anastacia Steele need plastic surgery to rebuild her bottom lip?
Will Christian Grey sort out his asthma and thus stop his breath from 'Hitching'?
Will condom makers ever make packets that don't emit a 'ripping of the foil' sound?
And.Will.Christian.Grey.Ever.Get.Over.His.Speech.Impediment.When.Aroused.And.Manage.An.Entire.Sentence.Without.The.Full.Stops?

Puhhlleeaassee...and now she is considering rewriting the trilogy from his point of view? God help us.

new

New???

Your user name, too lazy to type it all out

Hahaha oh dear!

Doh, stupid me! My brain must be fuddled because of reading the drivel that is fifty shades! In my defence I haven't been on here in a long time.

lmao New!
I read the first book and it was crap. Or should I say Double crap as Anastasia keeps saying. Loads of my friends have read it and love it. Why??? I'm all for different tastes, but no taste? no way.

Annoying notifications with ratings have started appearing on fb - all 5 star. I can't hoik any further!

Change your friends. (only half-joking)

Luckily there is still a small hardcore of jaded old harpies who are witheringly contemptuous

My husband has just asked me if I want a DH flavoured Popsicle...damn you FSOG!

I read the first, half read the second and skimmed the third just to know what happened t the end. Once you finish all three, it's blatantly clear that you have been played.... Wasted so much time on crap.

From the third pile of shite book, in the afterglow of a six month pregnant session with the flogger/whip...

"How's my daughter?"
"She's dancing."
"Dancing? Oh wow yeah i can feel her"
He [Christian] grins as Blip Two somersaults inside me.
"I think she likes sex already."

My reaction.

I need a vomiting smilie face.

New patches - too funny!!!! And true!

I'm halfway through the second one and can't be bothered o read the rest of it or the last book. Can someone summarise what happens? Thanks.

catpower at your reaction
But flogging session when 6 months pregnant then declaring baby loves sex cause it's thrashing about, vile !!!
I'm struggling to keep my lunch down tbh, so fucking glad I didn't bother reading more than the first couple of chapters of the first book!!

Just finished reading the first one after everybody I knew said how filthy it was. Pile of old rubbish, not in the least bit erotic and this is coming from someone who's labour was triggered off after watching an episode of a Jilly Cooper mini series, so it doesn't take much!!

Hahahaha! I love the scathing comments ...

and ... dare I say ... I loved the books! shock!

The sex does get repetitive and it is unrealistic ... and I consciously ignored the annoying Batman-isms of Ana Steele - but I found this approach (and maybe its the amateuristic nature of EL James' writing) quite refreshing. I liked that there aren't pages upon pages of environment descrptions and that there isn't a huge, building intro that means you're half way through the book before the story really starts. I do think the characters are developed, albeit subtley and not as complex as you're more credible literature - but I do see character development in this series which are hinted at through the first one and grown further in books 2 and 3.

Yes - its not shakespear but I can see why women love it and want more of it ... but I can also see why theres such a huge backlash and scorn.

Plus the criticisms are damn funny :-D

It's shocking. Shockingly awful.

But I enjoyed it.

If I have to find anything positive about it it would be her smart mouthing him on the emails they sent each other which were quite witty at times but other than that it was shite!