50 shades of grey is a pile of shite.

[EccentricaGallumbits]

Im only a couple of chapters in. please tell me it improves or i'll have to ditch it.

I went and bought it and got 2 chapters in and have now abandoned it in boredom. Agree with someone further up thread, if you want smut, try Lace or Scruples.

I thought it was hilarious.

You're a joyless lot

Oh so it's a comedy

crap, utter utter biggest pile of shite have ever had the misfortune to be given.

I have visions of signs being put up in charity shop windows "Please do not donate any more copies of Fifty Shades of Grey - we have enough"

I am curious as to know how after having soooo much sex alllllllllllll the time, why she has never had thrush.

The main character is making me stabby. The sex scenes better be worth it.

The sex scenes are completely not worth it.

I got bored of them by the third one. Same old same old.

Sex scenes def not worth it!!

pooh or cystitis!!

DREADFUL. Awful fiction and dire erotica

A friend recommended this and I thought I'd buy it to take on holiday...after reading this I don't think I'll bother. Like to read a bit of smut and used to buy Black Lace...hubby's eyes nearly popped out of his head when he read a page over my shoulder once. :) Are they still available?

Thank you, thank you for this thread I bought this for my Kindle a few days ago and its absolute shite, its worse than shite. I'm half way through and for the first time ever I'm not going to finish a book. Its so boring and I'm tempted to bite her feckin' lip just to stop her banal witterings.

So barring Cystitis and Thrush - which erotic literature is the good stuff?
Got something called shagging, pleasing something vaguely along those lines about audrey. Was a bit shit too. Lets find something good.................

Isn't the original Masters of the Universe or something?
[insert inappropriate fnar about cartoons here].

It is the worst book I have ever read, and I am actually pissed off that I wasted a couple of hours of my life skim reading it.

Utterly dire, it's the kind of thing that might turn on an easily titillated (and sheltered) teenager. Seriously, I would be concerned for any woman in her thirties or forties who might find this a turn on. I'm not a prude - I love erotica and have a very healthy appetite for sex TMI bt the sex scenes in this left me feeling cold - and short changed!

The plot is so thin it's not even there, the two main characters are not only dull as hell (especially) the wimpy female one, butbalso totally unbelieveable (why do theybhave yo be so young? I mean, how many 27 yr old self-made billionaires are there out there and how many 21 year old virgins who have never shown any interest in men or sex??!!). The prose is so bad it's comical, the sex scenes are, as I've said, unbelievably bad. On top of all that I hear the whole thing's been ripped off from those Twilight novels.

On top of that the author has the temerity to mention Thomas Hardy in among all that tripe. Sacrilege. Bah.

Excuse appalling typos. At least I have the excuse of not having an editor to check them.

(bloody predictive text...)

Awful. Repeat "oh my" "breath hitched" "foil ripped" x one million. The sex is so very dull.

SExy books for women - search for 'black lace' on Amazon books. I think these are no longer published but there are still some available.

I bought the last Shades of Grey as I don't normally read romance and don't like badly written books or unconvincing characters but wanted to see what the fuss was about.
So far have only managed first chapter or two before getting bored and am plodding through end of book just to see what happens but that is too tedious too.
Think that the Americans are normally a bit prudish about sex and this book sneaked under the radar and hence the 'shock'. Also suspect some v good marketing by publisher, let's face it 'mommy porn' does attract interest.

It was the constant 'fisting' of hands in hair that got me...

Yep it's boring. She's a drip and he's just funny. Read 3/4 of it and skimmed most of it. Oh and yes nipple tweaking can do that if timed and done right, but not in the first 5 mins. The oven needs to be on full heat to even stand a chance

I started it to see what all the hype is about. I read the first 4 chapters and have now just started skipping to the so called raunchy bits. Whit a load of shite!!

I keep hoping she is going to bite her lip clean off!

Im glad im not the only one who thinks this is shit.

Just commented on a friends FB page as she is asking questions about reading it. She asked if she should banish her husband out for the next 6 months-
I replied that unless you have the reading age of a 4 year old then you won't need 6 mths to read it. Her friends ( who "bought all 3 for £10 from asda") have suggested that I am a 'prude' for not finding it at all entertaining.

I laughed and reiterated that its woefully shit and is being bought in a mass hysteria by bored housewives.

Lots of people I know are reading this but I am going nowhere near it. What is the foil thing though?

Foil thing is the condom

I agree with the fisting Jo - for some reason that really bugs me!!