DIET FAILED AGAIN? Thread two. Join us in a friendly supportive thread.

[poorpaws]

Thread two! Feel free to join us. We are a small, friendly group who are very supportive without any judgement.

Aww thanks for the suggestion @endlesswashing . It'll just depend how much self control I have😂, although I'm going off it a bit after a few binges recently. 😯 but the thought of losing weight may help too (bit of a lightbulb moment).

Hiya all, nice to see it chatty... I'm also a self sabotager... Nice to see I found my tribe 😄.

Been busy covering at work, working every day instead of part time. It is stopping me from grazing which is good. But am knackered now...

Hope everyone's weekend goes well. Feeling positive... must think about my Christmas goal...

Couldn't resist weighing myself and now 14 and a half stone. Xmas target 14 stone, but anything close I'll be happy with.

Lots of great chats on here. I've been mad busy the last two weeks but couldn't post without responding to @ClaraTheImpossibleGirl. it took me years and years and years to realise that my mums constant criticism and belittling of everything I did was because she was fearful of change and how that made her feel about herself... nothing to do with me. From what you've said about DH, your changing your lifestyle to lose weight may well make him feel resentful, and try to stop you by making you think you can't. Possibly not consciously. I haven't articulated that well at all. But I've noticed over time that very few people can actually let people get on with their own lives and think everything is about themselves. Ever quit a job and had negative reactions from colleagues who were unhappy too!? Your taking steps to change shows them that they aren't.

I also was really interested in your observation about fit families. I don't think anyone wakes up and thinks "we are a fit/fat family", it's just their habits. Habits are hard to change! But over time we can acquire new family habits and routines too.

I've been thinking about how much my children snack recently. All of us are big snackers. I also remember as a child going to stay with (thin) relatives where I was constantly hungry and scolded and belittled whenever I said I was hungry, so I've got the fear that my sons might feel bullied and ashamed if I don't listen to them. But it's my responsibility to find that balance for them.

@poorpaws thank you so much for your confidence in me, really gives me a boost. I'm so impressed by your efforts too and everyone on this thread to keep on getting back up and going on! My weight fluctuates through the week so im sticking to Mondays only and last Monday was 10st 4.5lbs - on track!

keep on keeping on everyone.

Ooh. Weighed today and was 16stone 8. I posted on here last Sunday at 16 st 12, so incredibly, I have lost 4 pounds. I don’t even think it’s water, but perhaps it is. My belly was absolutely massive and it has visibly shrunk. I have been trying hard though.
Yesterday I had Wagamama at lunchtime, chose the best option, but it left about 100 calories for dinner, and I honestly was ravenous. I had a massive bowl of cut up raw veg, and a teeny piece of my apple cake, so only went very slightly over. Trouble is, past failures tell me that I can sustain a diet for 2 weeks and then I start to think oh fuck it. I hope the medical imperative will stop that happening, but I’m going to try to work out ways to combat it.
One is just not having any crap in the house, which still leaves the bread bin. But I hate seeded loaves, so think maybe that’s what we should buy.
Interesting to think of the impact of our childhood. We were quite poor growing up and didn't ever have biscuits or cake or fruit. There was no snacking at all. Iwas always really hungry at mealtimes, and was seen as the fat/ greedy one. My Mum used to plate the food and then ask which I wanted, and take food from the plate I chose. Everyone thought it was hugely funny. It wasn’t.
It’s really difficult for me to leave food. I’m trying to eat slowly and stop when I’m full, may take a bit of deprogramming.

@Zebracat yay! Brilliant loss, feels so good doesn't it.

My new soup maker arrived yesterday and I love it. I hadn't been shopping so only had carrot, onions, stock pots so I made a very plain and ordinary carrot soup, it was gorgeous. @TalkToTheHand123 now the cooler nights are here I'll be joining you in the soup feast every lunchtime.

I was doing so, so well until my lovely neighbour decided she was going north to visit her family and emptied the contents of her fridge into my kitchen. Oh my goodness she is an amazing cook, I just couldn't resist. I gave the biggest portions to DP but I just had to have some. I swear if I lived with her I'd be 30 stones. I am trying to do damage limitation today.

Many congratulations and a big hug to @triplecheeese who is no longer overweight but in the healthy weight range. You are an inspiration to us all, very well done. Note to everyone else, we will all get there with determination and encouragement from this thread, we will!

My weigh day tomorrow (it comes round so quickly) so I must be careful tonight. Good luck to Monday weighers.

@poorpaws 😍😘😍thank you so much. I might need to join you in soup town now the weather is getting cooler and my trusty lentils & crunchy salad is not going to tempt me! Let's see what Monday brings... a big week at work and DH is abroad for several days but I'm determined to get to the pool at 7am -and leave DH to the morning chaos for once so hoping I can stick to decent meals.

CONGRATULATIONS on your fantastic loss and control in the evening @Zebracat! that's an amazing boost, well done you and proud of you for putting your health first!

Weird isn't it thinking about how childhood eating affects us. My mum says she and her siblings remember being hungry and being bullied for any perceived greed by their parents (same grandparent used to give me "diet tips" as a child). They all ended up either very overweight or extremely thin. All food obsessed in different ways. I'm all about the emotional eating which I don't think it's from childhood, mine is related to trying to manage anxiety (poorly evidently).

Bonne chance Monday weighers. May the scales be ever in your favour

Yay for soup buddies ☺️.

Bit of a Sunday dinner blowout today so keeping away from the scales for a while😳😂.

Should be ok though as back on the soup tomorrow.

Hi all and apologies for the long absence... I've had such a rubbish week it was AF week which didn't help, but I've just been exhausted - DTS2 is being an absolute horror and I'm thoroughly depressed about the whole situation really!

But thank you all very very much for the good wishes and the observations, it's all welcomed - and interesting to see how many other people it struck a chord with! @BeyondMyWits I'm hoping to say Clara CAN at some point too...

@Readytostartagain you're right, it really does take a mindset change to lose weight successfully and this week I just didn't have it! I heard something the other day that I wasn't aware of - Steve Jobs always dressed the same (so he would have several pairs of the same trousers, loads of the same tops etc) as it freed up some headspace for him - he could think about other things (presumably developing Apple and making squillions of quid!) rather than taking any time thinking about what to wear. For me a lifestyle change needs to have the same sort of effect, for example, I would 'just do' exercise, I don't think 'should I or shouldn't I' because then inevitably I can't be bothered

I love a bit of soup too @TalkToTheHand123 , I will have to look out some good recipes again.

@triplecheeese adding my congratulations on your weight loss!! I think I may have written about it before but my DM was also a big critic of my weight, there were many, many cutting comments from around the age of 10 - and yet when I look at photos I was a little bit chubby but honestly, nothing enormous. Since then I've more or less been on a constant diet my DF has always been pretty fit and healthy - he's early 70s now and embarrassingly much fitter than DP! - and looking at it objectively, I can see that he's in the habit of doing plenty of exercise, whereas DP is in the habit of doing... well, not much! DTS2 is a major snacker and I do worry that he's going to end up a fat kid; he's great at eating his fruit & veg (not like DTS1, which is a whole other battle!) but would follow DP's lead and weld himself to the sofa all day if he could...

@Zebracat well done from me too on your weight loss!! I enjoy swimming as well but find it a bit of a faff with hairdrying etc, plus it's actually quite expensive near me. Do you know I don't remember snacking much as a child either; I was always a really active child, out and about and on the go, it wasn't till I hit puberty plus was having a miserable time at home and at school that I turned to food for comfort. By that time we didn't have much money - I had (have) a younger sibling with severe additional needs and we were skint for a good few years as DM couldn't go back to work as planned - and all the food was ready meals, fatty, sugary etc, there was no time/ money to prepare healthy options. I heard DP say again today "oh Clara would be rubbish at that, ho ho" and am practising my tinkly laugh for next time

@poorpaws what a lovely (but in some ways unhelpful!) neighbour you have!! Mine has nicked the batteries out of my solar light

Families can be really unhelpful with negative thoughts can't they? When you said about your driving, I remembered that my parents wouldn't help with any of my costs for my driving lessons or tests because "you're older now, you should be independent, if you want to learn you need to pay for yourself etc" - then when my sibling (2 years younger) wanted to learn, they paid for all the lessons, the test, and bought and insured a car for them...

A Christmas goal would be amazing!! I'm going for a stone please

Good morning all.

And well done on losses.
Amazingly I'm down to 71.5kgs
Im having a bit of a grim time, at home with dsd1 finding something out about dp and me and she has told dp she will never speak to him again.. She's rather dramatic but dp is now saying he needs to go and live in our London flat on his own for a bit to try to see her etc.
I'm upset as firstly it's my flat too and I use it a few nights a week, secondly dsd2 is at home with me and so when does she see her df? And thirdly... Just wtf?
Anyway upshott is I'm feeling quite nauseated... Weight loss is silver lining I suppose

@Theredjellybean that sounds so difficult. Families aye so much drama. Well done with your weight though, that's very good news so really well done and I hope the family problems get sorted very soon.

I have lost a pound this week and it's much better than a gain so I'll take it. Really really slow weight loss for me but better than the dreaded weight standstill which I've been through a lot just lately.

Good luck with all the weigh-ins today, I'm looking forward to hearing your results.

Hiya all, some lovely losses on here today... maybe some oomph has lingered... it is amazing though how many of us have deep seated, long lasting issues around food.

Weigh in time for me... I lost a pound! 15st 7.5lb now. Slowly but surely....

I think my Xmas goal has to be - being able to say I'm 14 stone something... last time I could do that was 22 years ago.

(Touch wood) I have this dieting malarky sussed, so I'm fairly confident I don't need to monitor my weight as much and losses can be greater between weigh-ins.

I don't get as frustrated in front of a mirror now as my body shape looks a bit better than a few months ago. Long way to go for flat tummy, but I feel I'm on track.

I'd like it to go a bit quicker so always trying to find little adjustments / better routines.

A few years ago my dad made a quite blunt / rude comment about my weight, so it'll be even more sweeter getting a few more inches off the waist.

I should have enough time to lose most of what I want by Xmas.

Great losses everyone. It's so lovely when we all lose weight albeit sometimes a small amount. As long as the scales actually go down we are winning and it feels so good. I can feel the return of the oomph on here this morning, so good to feel the positivity. Keep it up folks.

I'm sitting at home waiting for my air fryer to be delivered so in the next few days I hope to be cooking even healthier food. Soup again for lunch 😉

Well done everyone, we are doing great work.

1.5lb down for me this week despite a less than perfect weekend. Well done everyone on your losses. Sorry to hear things are tough @Theredjellybean 💐

Sorry to hear about your family drama @Theredjellybean , I hope things settle down soon

Well done on your continuing losses @TalkToTheHand123 !

Are you still enjoying using your soup maker @poorpaws ? If it was a good purchase I may have to treat myself to one

Good news about your weight loss too @BeyondMyWits ! And yes, very true about the deep seated issues with weight... has anyone watched You Are What You Eat on Channel 5 recently? It's quite like Secret Eaters in the 'transformation' aspect but I find the psychology aspect fascinating - for example, there's one woman who's eating very 'childishly' (lots of sweets, ready meals, comfort foods) as she's still upset about losing her grandfather and they remind her of being a little girl with him. Another woman is very emotional about eating any fruit & veg as they remind her of being made to clear her plate as a child. It's worth a watch if you find that sort of thing interesting!

Is It like the old You are what you eat? I found that presenter rather unkind. Perversely though, I used to get mad that the contributors had really shit diets whereas I just ate a bit too much. Felt a bit jealous I guess!
found myself just snatching at things here and there today, walnuts and a pear from the tree.pork crackling(I know!) I can feel that self sabotage cranking up. I must not lie to myself.

@Zebracat ..do you use mfp or similar.
I found it was very helpful at keeping me aware of all the extra bites of this and that adding up.

Good morning everyone

@ClaraTheImpossibleGirl I absolutely love my new soup maker. It's so quick and easy compared to how I've been making soup for years and much smoother than I can ever get it with a blender. So far I've made the original carrot soup which was lovely and yesterday I made a parsnip soup (my favourite) which was gorgeous apart from the fact that I put too much garlic in. If you do decide to get one and Google mole Valley farmers, then on their website search soup makers, you'll find mine had 50% off and was a great deal. I don't think they'll be there for much longer because I bought one on the first day of the offer. I've got a feeling it's an older model from the model number but it's absolutely great and in my opinion worth full price. It's a good quality Morphy Richards and as cheap in the sale as the basic Aldi one.

How are you all doing? I seem to be stuck this week. I am still dieting, I am still having the soup at lunchtime and I'm not snacking but the scales have been stuck for four days now, it's so disheartening. I'm hoping they move downwards before Monday's weigh-in.

My SIL text last night to ask to meet up for coffee and cake (sadly her bungalow sale has fallen through). I told her I was happy to meet for a coffee but no cake for me 😇. I just hope I don't cave when I meet her because I absolutely love cake and the place we are going to do the most gorgeous cakes.

Have a good day making the right choices everyone,

We have a feeder at my service and yesterday and I succumbed to her cheesecake due to having a stressful day and not wanting to be rude and say no. It was nice but felt sickly for a while after.

Scales showing a little increase which is a bit of a surprise, as I have been quite good otherwise.

The plan is to not buy anymore ice cream. I have about a month's worth left in the freezer, so hopefully I should start losing again soon.

@TalkToTheHand123 aww feeders are such a problem when trying to lose weight. I always say "just a very small piece" and they cut a quarter of the cheesecake and hand it to me. I've started saying "I've got a bit of a headache and feel a bit sickly so do you mind if I don't have any" (But thank you it does look lovely).

I don't buy ice cream from October onwards. It's DPs birthday on 21 Sept so we always walk into town, have fish and chips and then a triple ice cream in a waffle cone. By the time it's my birthday in November the holiday ice cream parlours are closed so I moan every year that I pay on his birthday but it's never reciprocated 😁

@Theredjellybean I do use MFP, but I mainly guess amounts, and I’m not sure it was 20 g of pork crackling!. I’m just not the sort of person who can snack. 1 thing leads to another.
I have got the scales out on the worktop now, and I’m determined to weigh everything, even tho, to my family this looks fanatical and obsessed, but I’m the one with 6 stone to lose.

And you will @Zebracat you will if you keep measuring and trying. I have the faith, I believe you can and will do it.