I am so fat there are a number of things I can't do

[Newyearnew2017me]

Walk without getting breathless. Even small distances.

Wipe my bottom.

Wash myself properly. I do, but it's very difficult indeed.

Wear nice clothes that fit.

Sit next to someone in the car without touching the driver embarrassingly

Plane seats ditto

I am not writing this for people to lay into me and tell me I'm a horrible example to my children, or that I'm a waste on the NHS. I wasn't fat when I had my children, in fact I was marginally underweight with no1 (very marginally mind!) Please do not be critical of me because I have already done so.

I had planned to start today and binged. This made me realise I cannot do this alone.

I am starting my journey tomorrow, Monday 2nd January. If I don't I will be dead before I am 60. I am not saying this to sound dramatic it's just how it is.

Please support me, please tell me I can do this, please promise me there is a life out there for me if I am brave enough to stick to this.

I don't mean to criticize but I think you expecting to much to fast.

Good luck with your efforts.

My husband and I went for a walk in our local park today. First time we've been as we've not long moved into the area. It was lovely.

So yes, I do get how you are feeling.

Why can't you have a hot chocolate ? I know you are on a vcld but could you not build in an Options hot chocolate made with hot water ?

Bluntness, it was meant as a joke. I meant that I might have a week where I gained 3lbs, fhen lose 2, then gain 1, then lose 2.

So over the course of a year I'd probably gain about 10 stone but also lose about 10 as well. I didn't binge in the morning yesterday, it was about 4 o clock and that's when I sought help.

No, you can't really do that

Friend of mine lost 8 stone on a vlcd.

But didn't stick to the "steps" when re introducing food.
If your going to do this op. Please stick to the steps

OK, again, I don't mean to criticize but with vcld's you are pretty much starving yourself.

It sounds like a punishing regime. What are you punishing yourself for ?

Remarks like, 'shift the bulk' sound self-critical. Can you be a bit more kind and encouraging to YOURSELF ? Be nice to yourself, you can be your own worst critic. Try and be your own best friend.

I'm also worried that setting the goal to lose the bulk of the weight by Easter sounds quite unrealistic based on your description of your weight at the moment in your op. It's better to be conservative than set yourself up to fail and feel miserable.

There's a lot I could explain, but I really don't think I can be bothered.

vlcd = very low calorie diet. vlcd = me cocking up the initials.

I'm not saying that I'm right but a successful diet I lost all my weight on was a low fat diet that allowed a 150 calorie treat each day that was factored into the day's calories.

Good luck OP.

There's a lot I could explain, but I really don't think I can be bothered.

Ok.

Purple the point is I started the thread for support, and unfortunately it hasn't worked out that way.

It's absolutely fine to ask for support, but people aren't blindly going to agree with you. Apart from one or two posts, the vast majority of the thread has been offering you encouragement. I'm not sure why you're being so aggressive in your responses.

Newyear, you don't owe anyone an explanation. I just wonder how helpful your very short timeframe for losing the weight is.

I may be wrong but I've assumed that your priority is to be healthy over the long term - see your DCs grow up, enjoy retirement etc. When you look back 30 years from now, whether you reached your goal by Easter '17 or Christmas '19 will make very little difference. I know it's hard to think in those terms when you've reached the point of desperation, but I just worry that a vlcd is going to mean bouncing back into a binge and regaining the weight, as it does for most people. Note people upthread mentioning having gone on multiple crash diets - if they really worked you'd only ever need one!

You've had some good advice on here, but it sounds like you have a clear idea of the way forward now - best of luck!

The last thing intended was aggression and I am mortified any of my posts could have been taken in that way

However, the thread is not helpful with people telling me my chosen method won't work.

Iron I can't really stick to normal healthy eating unless I'm a reasonable size. I can't explain it in any other way, I should be able to lose 3 and a half stone by Easter.

I think everyone is being very supportive, but you're being very, well , rude in response.

I think many of us are confused. On one hand you describe your weight issues in the opening post which would indicate significantly overweight, but then you sort of minimise it, where you talk about getting the bulk of it off by Easter, which would indicate you are only two or three stone over weight.

A very low calorie diet can work, but as you're not articulating how much you have to lose, it's hard to say how long you would need to be on it for and whether that's a good idea or not.

Weight loss is 70 percent what you eat and 30 percent exercise. Focus on food. Slimming World is great. You can eat as much as you like of certain foods. The groups are great or you can do it online. I know so many people in my SW group who have lost 5 stone +

I need to lose about 5 stone.

I weighed myself on the 29th, it was on those dial scales and it looked like just under 15 stone, maybe 14'10 but I did have my shoes on.

Thanks for the advice about SW but it's not for me.

Threads turning into an argument. No rudeness intended from me but I really needed support.

NewYear I think you're maybe feeling a bit touchy, which is completely understandable as you must be feeling vulnerable (and possibly hungry!)

All we're trying to do is arm you for the potential pitfalls of a dramatic plan like the one you seem to be undertaking: like it or not they don't have a very good success rate, but as I said, I do think there is a valid place for a VLCD in a weight loss plan as long as you go into it with your eyes open. I think the thread is a bit confused because at first it sounded like you wanted advice on how to start, but then said you had your plan but didn't want to talk about it, but wanted support.

In any case please don't ditch the thread, or at least join / start another, because as I said upthread I've found there's nothing like a supportive thread and we are all rooting for you!

(And there will be lots of people who read the OP and pile in with advice you've already discussed, like slimming world, just ignore them from now on!)

can't stick to normal healthy eating unless I'm a reasonable size

This literally makes no sense.

I'm worried about your mindset op, you seem extremely negative and just pooh pooh people's opinions and suggestions. Why?? Everyone making a suggestion is only trying to help.

I know they are but sometimes that help can be conveyed in a way that, although is trying to be supportive, is actually not.

Whos, I don't know. But it's always been the case. I am fat or I am losing weight or I am a healthy weight and eating well. I always find it easier to eat well when I've got the motivation of keeping w Niceish figure, it doesn't matter if it makes sense or not. It's how I feel.

15 stone isn't actually that bad and I doubt would cause your breathlessness.

I haven't read all this but I do think you would benefit from some advice from your GP/dietician and,possibly some psychotherapy to help deal with your relationship with food and help with strategies to manage your perception of your self/self esteem.

Good luck op. It's very complex. I speak as a recovered anorexic.

Newyear I think that makes sense - you're either "in the zone" or you're not; when you are you're slimmer, when you're in a place of sabotage you're less so. Not to rake over it again but I think that can be the problem with crash diets etc: they're very all-or-nothing, so falling off the wagon can be catastrophic, which is why I suggested you have a slightly more sustainable plan lined up for when you reach the end of the VLCD period if you have a time frame in mind, or when you feel the wagon wobbling if you just want to plug away for as long as you can.

Well I am pretty vast so any action plan after the diet is a way in the Future!

I wish you every success if I may recommend drinking 1.5l of water as this really helps with controlling your appetite. You should also leave 5 hours between meals and not eat anything in between. This will regulate your insulin and blood sugar. Final tip is to limit carbs look at the metabolism diet.