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Weight loss chat

A space to talk openly about weight loss journeys and challenges. Mumsnet hasn't checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. You may wish to speak to a medical professional before starting any diet.

**Guidance for a mother who has gained more than 70lbs in four years**

178 replies

MTTC · 21/04/2012 16:02

Before the children, weight was 120lbs, now four years later, 195lbs. This is primarily due to the less active lifestyle (staying at home after losing job) and dramatic change in diet (can only eat what I can afford due to extraordinary drop in income).

I know all there is to know about a healthy balanced diet. The children get a very well balanced diet; do not eat junk food (never an advocate of fast food and cannot afford it more importantly), and they eat vegetables everyday (no exceptions) and fresh fruit when it is bought. No carbonated drinks; chocolate and crisps in moderation. There is a cooked meal everyday (yes, everyday) for the children; their meals planned daily, covering the recommended food groups, but as a parent, if there is not enough food to go around, I eat what I can, so at times (more than not) having a balanced diet does not apply to me; usually end up eating bread. Due to my dedication to the chidlren they are bright, happy and are not aware (and should definitely not be) of the pressures in the household due to the financial restraints.

In order to attempt a change personal lifestyle, more so, in fitness, I asked a ?friend? to join me in attempting to lose weight by jogging (which is what we used to do with her many years ago). At first, she said yes, but made excuses four times in succession (with low self- esteem, and feeling very self-conscious I needed the moral support of someone with me). Then she stated that, ?I had not gained that much weight? and did not need to do anything as I ?carried it well?. I told her a 75lb weight gain in four years was significant. We ended up arguing, and she said there are more important things going on in the world then worrying about weight!

I understand there are far more important issues going on in the world (the daily news does not let you forget), but I would like to do something for myself - for once. I can feel the pain in the lower back, and the rolls of fat under the skin at my sides. My knees are painful at times, especially going up and down stairs, and sometimes I get out of breath, and also noticed a small pain in the centre of my chest during the night when lay down.

I believe I need to do something before it gets to a point where I will not be able to it without medical assistance.

So, how do I do it? how do I make the first step in changing the way I look, when there is limited time, money, and lack of confidence?

Any honest advice will be appreciated, as I just need that extra push from those who (are not my 'friend') may understand that it is not the when it is the how - thank you.

OP posts:
MTTC · 24/04/2012 08:51

FlouncyMcFlouncer - Hi there!!!

No worries, a good chat is good too! - I do love the rain (when I am inside). Still damp out today, but will head to a market about a mile away. Children are at school perfect before I have to collect the little one!

OP posts:
MTTC · 24/04/2012 09:25

Feeling positive this morning!

Got up before the children and jogged on the Wii for 20 minutes (think this is a good time for the future). Found that it was peaceful and I was not disturbed. Thought about the day ahead - the time went by very quickly (may increase to 25 mins next week).

Family breakfast included me (it has been a while), and it was a more relaxed early morning than yesterday. The children usually get a prepared breakfast, several times a week, as I believe some of the cereals that they ask for contain a lot of salt, at times, I compromise with as near an alternative as I can, but I usually win out if I believe is contains certain elements that they are not able to have.

This is my danger time when I would down four/five slices of bread without any thought during the morning. We have a four-slice toaster and it would be on the go always - but, now looking at the circumstances, I don?t know why I have a four-slice toaster as the children actually don't like toasted bread!!!

Have not felt the crash of the reduced carb diet as yet - but looking out for it!!!

OP posts:
BIWIWhoMustBeObeyed · 24/04/2012 09:27

Please tell me that you are eating veg/salad as part of your new diet though?

PassTheTwiglets · 24/04/2012 09:45

Still no idea why you think that canned food is unhealthy and that tinned tomatoes contain salt?! Confused Honestly, that's just utter nonsense. Not sure where you are getting your information from but I'd bet that it's from some kind of scare-mongering 'nutritionist' website or similar. As for low-carbing, you're going to get very hungry on a limited budget. I'd suggest trying Slimming World (I'm sure you can find out about the diet weithout having to pay for classes). The diet doesn't suit me personally but you can eat loads of cheap food on a 'green day' - unlimited pasta, rice, lentils (maybe potatoes?) - all cheap staples. It doesn't cost much to eat that way and you never need to be hungry.

ohforfoxsake · 24/04/2012 09:54

But, Passthetwiglets, those starchy carbs don't offer much in the way of nutrition. I'm having kippers for breakfast - dead cheap at £2 for 2 packets in Sainsburys. OK, I may seem as though I'm 97 years old, the bones are fecking annoying and my kitchen doesn't smell good at 9.50am but I know I won't eat till my omlette at lunchtime.

But, if you did want to do a programme like SW or WW, have a look on Quidco. There is often a WW deal where you sign up for 3 months, and get £30 cashback - so as long as you have the money up front and can wait for it to be paid back, its essentially 3 months free. Not sure if its on at the moment, but it comes around fairly regularly.

MTTC · 24/04/2012 10:03

PassTheTwiglets - Hi there!!!

A valid point, but unfortunately this is not ideal for my children. I will keep it brief as this thread is about me and not my children but they have a medical condition (I may have mentioned it briefly in a reply) that limit what they can eat, and it is difficult for me to grab things off the shelf. Therefore, I had (past tense) chosen to ignore myself (which I know is not what I should have done) in favour of their well-being.

Maybe once I have settled down I will start a thread with what I have learned about the food we eat (years with my children has taught me a lot, which unfortunately I did not apply to myself) for now though - it is all about my changes.

Have never tried slimming world or any other slimming programme. This is the first time I have ever been on a diet or any sort, as I have never had call to before the children!!!! Therefore, this is my first attempt. I know I should have done it sooner - but now I believe my mind is in the right place to do it -if you can understand.

Thanks for your suggestion!!

OP posts:
BIWIWhoMustBeObeyed · 24/04/2012 10:03

PassTheTwiglets - OP refuses to debate issues where she has been challenged, for some reason.

PassTheTwiglets · 24/04/2012 10:17

What is not idea for your children? Eating cheap carbs?

ohforfoxsake, no they don't offer a great deal of nutrition but I wasn't suggesting that's all the OP should eat :)

higgle · 24/04/2012 10:20

I'm very fat at the moment, all my own fault as 2 years ago I was 9 stone and able to run 10k in 59 minutes. A combination of work stress, too much to do and too little time, and caring for a very sick dog who needs me to be with him when I would previously at the gym/out running/taking him for a walk
is the background - but there is no excuse.

Things that have previously helped me lose weight are - high protein breakfast - 2 egg omlette and a tomato is around 200 calories. I take a packed lunch to work and find making much the same every day - corn or rice cakes cottage cheese or humous a box of salad and a piece of fruit becomes second nature and is quick and easy. In the evening I cook from scratch and eat a small portion of whatever the family is having with extra veg or salad.

My eating habits are so poor when I'm fat with all the extra crisps, sandwiches and biscuits I shovel down that eliminating these and having some tinned veg would be a substantial improvement. I am trying to cut down on salt at the moment and I changed from Passata - which was very high in salt to Tesco value tinned toms + tomato puree and there is only a trace of salt in that combination, much cheaper and more healthy.

For veg bargains you need a market - our local one has very cheap peppers, apples and green veg. I had a huge carrier bag of the most delicious purple sprouting for £1 last week.

Don't be self conscious about exercise - I'm sure anyone seeing a fattie out exercising will think "good for them" (that is what I tell myself )

This week my feet hurt a lot, it is totally down to me and I will be starting over with the diet and exercise plan again. Accepting responsibility is essential because then you have less scope for backsliding.

PorkyandBess · 24/04/2012 10:20

I have noticed this, BIWI.

higgle · 24/04/2012 10:23

P.S. There is loads of salt in bread if you are eating it in large quantities.
Shredded wheat is one of the best breakfast cereals if you just buy the plain one or bite sized. Not much fun though!

MTTC · 24/04/2012 10:26

PassTheTwiglets - No, I did not say eating cheap carbs was not ideal for the children. On the contrary, I don't think I have ever said that carbs were not ideal for my children anywhere on this thread. So you may have misinterpreted the information. The carb aspect of the thread is more to do with me and how I approach this new diet where I elimante/reduce the carbs.

OP posts:
MTTC · 24/04/2012 10:28

Hi higgle - thanks for you comment it was very honest and yes, I accept responsibility for myself and no-one else is to blame but me!!

OP posts:
MTTC · 24/04/2012 10:39

Hi porkyandbess - As a mother you find that you always put your children first, and over several years I have done just that, without a second thought, which has got me into the situation I am in now.

Now, I am trying to put myself first, if you can understand that. I do not want this thread to be about a myriad of other issues that would only push what I am trying to achieve to the back -which will have me in the same situation as before - being last.

This thread is about me and my changes, if you can provide suggestions that would be great, anything positive would be appreciated.

OP posts:
Schnarkle · 24/04/2012 10:53

Suggestion 1: Cut the bread down to 1 occasion p/day. A serving at breakfast for example. Take a look at the suggested serving sizes on packets and containers. It's a real eye opener. Have this bread as part of a meal not as a meal in itself.

Suggestion 2: Eggs are your friends. Do a google search on recipes for eggs there's many ways to make them interesting without your diet falling into a rut. a 6 pack of eggs would last a week if you were to have a boiled egg for breakfast with a slice of toast. Not huge expense in that and a protein filled breakfast as the result.

Suggestion 3: Set the weekly supermarkets specials as a set of bookmarks on your internet browser. To keep on top of specials going at the moment in each of them..

Suggestion 4: A quick google of the phrase " feeding a family on a budget " throws up a heap of blogs and websites with ideas and recipes for eating for less. Moneysavingexpert as mentioned before is great for this. Have a look also at the house keeping section here, a great thread there on what can be frozen. A real eye opener, loads of things mentioned there I would never have thought of , great for when you spot a bargain.

Suggestion 5: Get out and walk. Set your watch or phone, walk for 10 mins in any direction. Results in a 20 min walk without thinking abut it ( well you do have to walk back Grin A simple thing like this will lift the spirits no end.

Suggestion 6 : Throw any excuses out the window

Suggestion 7 : Open your mind to all the great advice you've been given here. No one is out to get you, but you have to expect your ideas to be challenged when you post on an open forum like this.

Suggestion 8: Do some real shelf research yourself on tinned tomatoes and tinned beans, they're life savers. The amount of salt, sugar in them varies hugely across the different brands.

Good luck!

MTTC · 24/04/2012 11:04

Schnarkle - Thank you, I cannot say that enough!!

That is the most comprehensive set of guidelines someone has produced since I started this thread!

Some of those I have already chosen to embrace and for me, suggestion 6 is going to be my mantra going forward:

'Stop making excuses'.

Fantastic!!!

OP posts:
BIWIWhoMustBeObeyed · 24/04/2012 11:15
Hmm

So the information on the bootcamp, the 'rules' and the list of allowed veg wasn't helpful enough for you, MTTC?

PassTheTwiglets · 24/04/2012 11:16

MTTS, I was just querying what part of my post you thought wasn't suitable for your children. You responded to my post saying "this is not ideal for my children" and I was simply querying what 'this' was.

MTTC · 24/04/2012 11:41

Hi PassTheTwiglets - No worries, a misunderstanding!

Will definitely try more of the pulses, which you mentioned. Think it would help a great deal!

OP posts:
Lulabellarama · 24/04/2012 11:42

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ at the poster's request.

MTTC · 24/04/2012 11:55

Hi Lulabellarama - As this is just the beginning I can only give you the changes I have made over the last few days following the advice on this thread, which are meals I have eaten since Sunday. So this is just the starting point.

If you can bear with me until a little later, as I have to pick up the little one finishes at 12 noon (yes I am late)!!!

OP posts:
ladyintheradiator · 24/04/2012 12:45

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

FirstLastEverything · 24/04/2012 14:08

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MTTC · 24/04/2012 14:09

Hi Lulabellarama - This is what I have eaten over the last few days as I mentioned this is just the starting point.

Sunday

Breakfast: Yoghurt with fruit and glass of semi- skimmed milk

Snack: peeled and sliced carrots kept that in the fridge and snacked on it during the day as well and raisins

Lunch: Chicken, lots of vegetables and gravy

Supper: Left over mackerel from day before, with spinach

Monday

Breakfast: Scrambled eggs with shredded chicken (leftover from Sunday), chopped spring onion and tomato and a glass of milk

Snack: Yoghurt and raisins and carrots from the day before.

Missed lunch (yes I know it is bad!!)

Supper: Bolognese sauce with steamed broccoli

Tuesday

Morning: 2 x Sausages with one egg, and glass of milk

Snack: None (so far)

Lunch: Homemade spiced lentil soup

Would not normally eat half as much as this, but this thread has helped very much and will need to spend more time browsing the internet for more ideas and see how I can adapt it to my budget.

This may not be perfect, but I believe it is a good place to start for me and something I can work towards.

STILL NO BREAD!!!

OP posts:
MTTC · 24/04/2012 14:15

Oh and forgot to state lots and lots of water!!!!

OP posts: