Paul McKenna would be so proud of us on THREAD 9...No Pain, NO PAIN!! The Non Diet for those who really want to lose weight. No calories, no syns, no humiliation, just shedding stones amongst friends.

[Solo]

The Golden Rules that will aid you on your journey with our like minded support system:

1. Eat what you WANT
2. Eat when you are HUNGRY
3. Eat CONSCIOUSLY
4. STOP eating when you are satisfied and full

This weight loss system is about re-educating your body; learning to listen to it and in doing so losing weight and inches. So forget diets; they may work for a while, but they aren't permanent solutions. This is a new way of living for your brand new life!!

The Paul McKenna system works and is easy to maintain.

I've C&P'd our previous threads links as they are helpful.

Here are the book choices on AMAZON which is all you need to get started! they aren't compulsory, but they do help! it's something to refer to and listening to the cd's can really focus you.

This is the tapping technique EXPLAINED - this can be useful to combat cravings.

Please feel free to join us, whether it's 10lbs or 10 stones you want to lose.
We are friendly, supportive and successful, but we're not hungry OH NO we're not!!! so come on in and start living your new life today!

Well it's been a few weeks since I was on here. Not surprisingly, it has also been a few weeks since I have Pauled. I just can't understand myself. For 4 weeks I did so well, and lost 10 lbs. But suddenly, for no reason that I can perceive, I have lost the plot. I can't even get to do it for one full day. I don't understand how when I have done so well, that the success was not enough to keep me going. I can't claim emotional stress or anything out of the ordinary. I just seem to sabotage myself unconsciously. And I don't bloody know why. I just want to cry with the frustration. I was getting such lovely comments too. :( What the hell is wrong with me???

Stop it Rosy! Paul says falling off the wagon is to be expected. You've felt motivated to post here. Are you psyched up ready to start again? Could you listen to the cd tonight?

Page 59 if you've got the newer version of the book

Rosy :(

Please be kind to yourself. When you have been overweight for a long while, it becomes part of who you are and how you reference yourself within your family, your friendships and so on. It is really hard to let go of that, even when you desperately want to.
My thoughts have so often been like a broken record 'when I'm slimmer I will do X, when I'm slimmer I will feel Y'. When you feel like that time might be approaching, it is scary because suddenly you have to face the other issues or challenges that have been hiding behind your weight.

((((hugs)))) and keep listening to the CD. You can do it :)

Another one getting back on the waggon here. Unless I listen to the CD regularly I've discovered I "lose" it. I didn't listen to the CD for a few days and I totally overate (and drank too much in the sun) at the weekend. Although I have been doing lots of swimming. Back on track today.

Rosy I was really enjoying your posts, and finding them really motivating, as you seemed to be going through a similar journey to me over a year ago (using different user name). We've both got loads to lose. Be kind to yourself. Let's do this together.

Sorry realised I'm repeating Ali with "be kind to yourself". Good advice though.

It is a phrase that bears repeating I think! :)

Quick hello :)

Hi Solo, m'dear.

I'm off to bed now, but OP on this thread could possibly do with a bit of Paul treatment.

Night Solo. Night Ali. Night John Boy... [showing my age?]

Night Mardy night Mary Ellen me too!!

Morning,

Thanks for the lovely comments. I know that you are right. I need to get back on track, starting today. I know that I can do it. I need to start listening to the CD again as well.

I think a big part of going wrong for me was not logging on to the forum as well. I know things got busy, but part of not logging on was because I was not pauling. But actually, upon reflection, it was even more important to keep coming on to the site even if I was not following the GR's as I should have. Just reading through the last few weeks comments have been uplifting and I realise now that whether I have had a good day or a bad day, this site is part of what helps us to at least have a better frame of mind.

Thanks for being there.

Hi Rosy, nice to see you again.

I agree that avoiding the site is not good. I know when I have fallen off the wagon I tend to feel a bit of a fraud for being here but that is silly thinking really and in the end I think it is better to keep coming back, even if things aren't going well because once the link with Pauling and the others on this thread is s broken it would be all to easy to forget about it. You do know things aren't going well for me though because I go AWOL for a week and then only post hellos! I am not very good at fessing up to my many many failures.

You were saying that you don't think you can do this for the whole day but I don't think, at least in the beginning that matters. If you just manage to control your eating for part of the day that is still a reduction in your total food intake and far better than over eating all day. It might take a long time to get to goal but you will get there. Just stick with it and you will get your confidence back.

Oh and we haven't had a chat about self sabotage for ages on this thread but it happens to all of us from time to time. Almost like, if you are losing weight you won't be the same person any more and all those things you put off doing until you are slimmer are waiting there to challenge us which can be a bit scary. Being fat can be what defines you (it does me I think) and if you aren't fat any more well, who are you?

Daft but also understandable?

I need to get going with this properly, but I just can't. I havent read the book yet (need to get my hands on a copy first) My size 16 jeans are feeling tight ATM and Im feeling really down. Im doomed to a life of being fat aren't I. I feel like poo today and dont know where to start. Im starving (I know I should eat before I get to this stage but I just can't face it) and just waiting for lunch. There are some brownies near me I just want to stuff my face with, but I know it wont make me feel any better. As its just them that are near me has led me to get as hungry as I am.

Where do you get your willpower from? I can't listen to the CD as I dont have it and for reasons Im about to explain.

I know what my main problem is, its my total lack of support from DH. He's a SAHD while I work, but unfortunately ATM Im out of work (I have an interview tomorrow and have a good feeling about it so hopefully it wont be too long) so I am stuck with him all day. He just doesnt get why I want to lose weight. Im not obese and just podgy in places. He does the cooking and usually its not exactly healthy. When we go shopping (a task I dont like doing, but as he doesn't drive we both go) if I even hint that Im trying to watch what I eat he makes comments and makes no secret that he thinks Im silly for even worrying about it. He likes to eat crap and often encourages me to eat it too. I just can't get anywhere with my weight with him around. Dont get me wrong, he's great in all other areas (a great dad, does anything for me and the DCs etc) but I find that he is not encouraging at all, if anything its the other way.

Half way through writing I have thrown the brownies in the bin (all bar one which DD1 can have with her lunch as she likes them) so hopefully it will be a step in the right direction and might kick start me.

Sorry to have a whine and a moan, I just wanted to get it out there. I haven't been Pauling yet either (I need to read the book so I can see the complete set of rules and know how to tell when Im hungry/full), but as above posts suggests thats no reason why I shouldn't still post here.

I do have one question though. If you eat more will that stave off hunger for longer? Currently I have a banana for breakfast (have been for years) and am often hungry by half 10 at the latest. Its this time when the brownies/biscuits/cakes come out. So Im thinking for breakfast maybe have a bit more (bran flakes with banana) and hope I dont get hungry till lunch. Of course I can eat something different mid morning, but I just dont know what. I dont like nuts and seeds (its what most people seem to suggest) I never want fruit (I often go through stages of buying apples in for an afternoon snack, but they just get wasted).

Sorry that was so long, Im just getting it out there and off my chest. I think thats the first thing to do before I can even start to think about watching what I eat.

Hi Blossom. Welcome to the thread. First of all, get your nose into the book! It'll explain things better than any of us can.
Re hunger and breakfast. I try to chose food that keeps me going for a while - either a protein shake or toast. I've tried cereal this morning and I was hungry by 10am. So at 10am I ate something. The key is to eat til you're full and eat when you're hungry. Are you full on a banana? Why are you trying to stave off hunger? Are you worried if you don't you'll binge on 'unhealthy' food? I to focus on what the book says when it comes to food. I realised after my last failed diet and then reading the book that it's not what I eat, but how I eat it. It doesn't really matter what you eat as long as you follow the 4 rules. Hth a bit.

I am trying but life is interfering a bit! My pain is quite bad and AF arrived this morning. I'm waiting to lunch since I don't feel hungry yet. Want to run to shop at work but I want chocolate to comfort myself now embarking on cycke#32 ttc but there's not enough chocolate to fill that emotional hole! So I will resist.

Thanks Have I just need to get hold of a copy. I am worried about getting hungry then snacking on bad foods. I know the whole principle is eat what you want, but with me thats always something biscuity or cakey, surely it helps to actually eat healthily? Also I dont understand what people are meaning when they say they are not hungry for a biscuit, but knows their body wants fruit (for example), I guess the book will explain that. After a banana, Im no longer hungry, then again Im not usually over hungry when I get up anyway. I just eat something to kick start the day as Ive heard with not eating breakfast is one of the worse things to do.

On a positive note, just paid £2.95 for the book and CD off Ebay. Should arrive 7th-11th Its going to happen now. Ive been feeling crap for a few days about my weight, but I realised I just wasn't ready myself. Hopefully the book or CD will help with that. Sorry for moaning, I just needed to get it off my chest so I could go forward.

Fartblossom - hello!

I don't think it matters what you eat in the beginning. If you are hungry and you want chocolate. the important thing is to eat when you are hungry, eat what you want and savour it. Eat slowly and stop when you are full and you will eat very little. Honestly. It takes practice to listen to your body and know what enough feels like but you will start to recognise it most of the time quite quickly.

You are right you will need to eat less chocolate but that comes with confidence, losing a little bit of weight and appreciating that good food is better for you. We all know it in our heads but we have to get to the point where we have come so far that we don't want to eat bad things as often (there is no never - you can have them any time you want). In the meantime, just eating what you want still works if you stop when you aren't hungry any more. You will eat less.

Do get hold of the book and have a read though as PMcK writes it so much better than me trying to paraphrase.

As for your husband sabotaging you, I would suggest you don't tell him you are doing this. Eat what he cooks and leave what you don't want when you are full. Just tell him you aren't hungry. You could even lie and say you ate something earlier (he doesn't have to know when, how much or what it was!). Is he overweight? Maybe he doesn't want to feel bad about himself which he might if you lost your weight. I think this time of year you can also say it is too hot for stodgy/carbs etc. That would be true for me.

Good luck with your interview tomorrow as well.

FartB I think the book and Cd are key. I have to listento the Cd loads otherwise it doesn't work for me and I eat when not hungry .

Well I have had my feedback from the seller of the book, its not classed as delivered yet, but as it is a company they might do that at the end of the day or it might be in a warehouse due to go on someone's list tomorrow. Im feeling better now. Ive just come back from a run (I do C25K too) and realise that there is more things to be cheerful about right now :)

Thanks BBB

Hello FartBlossom :)

I agree that you should just not say anything to your DH. The beauty of PMK is that you don't have to eat special foods, or avoid anything, or weigh stuff - or any of the other things that diets require. Therefore you can just quietly get on with it.
I also agree not to worry about what you are actually eating at the moment, that will come in time once you are ready and your body is ready.

This WOE is all about how you eat, and about dealing with your emotions and feelings around food. Once you have made some headway with that, a lot of the other things that are currently worrying you will just fall into place.

And yes, listening to the CD is key.

DH knows Im getting the book and CD. There was no way to not tell him. He was here when I was checking my bank to see if I had the funds so I told him. He didn't seem bothered, but I know he rather I just got on with it and ate what i wanted (which most of the time is cake/biscuits/chocolate etc). I suppose thinking about it the PMK diet is good for both of us, I still get to eat the things I want (like DH says I should) and hopefully I will lose some weight.

Hello everyone.

A lot of what people have been saying about losing weight changing things and that being scary rings true with me.

My weight problems really began at Uni ( 20 odd years ago now) when I was unable to see that my 9 stone body was actually quite curvy and nice. So I began to 'diet' and got fatter and fatter. I think I have spent so much of my adult life being overweight that I don't know how to be slim? I don't know who the slim me is cos I've never, in my eyes, been slim. I have always wanted to do the Moonwalk and I kept telling myself that I would do it when I had lost weight. Well, of course, I never did and thus I hadn't done the Moonwalk. Last year I thought bllcks to it and signed up. I am doing three Moonwalks this year. I really think my change in attitude towards that one goal has signalled achange in my appraoch to losing weight - I am now longer waiting to be slim - I am doing what I want to do now. And funnily enough I am losing weight, albeit at a very slow rate! A colleague today commented that I was looking slimmer. I have lost 11 lbs since about November. Now that is slow but I feel it is sustainable.

My OH is very supportive. he would like to be slimmer himself but I sense irritation in him when I comment that I will do x when I have lost weight..... I wonder if he has stopped believing I can. I will jsut have to believe twice as much for both of us!!

Great post never

FartBlossom ( I feel weird shortening your name to fart). I've been thinking about our post and if this were the relationships board, your Dh would be getting some serious grief about controlling what you can and cannot eat. If that were my DH, I would be absolutely furious. How dare someone force/coerce/deliberately influence (choose whichever verb you like) another person to overeat on junk food. Apart from the weight issues, what about health issues? Does he have some sort of motive for stopping you from being healthy and whatever size you like? Is he worried you won't tolerate his junk food habits if you eat healthily? Seriously, I am fuming on your behalf. And if it were me, I'd be confronting him about this behaviour.

mardy dont worry about the name shortening, though some people shorten it to FB.

Anyway I know how it sounds and he doesn't force feed me and he doesn't stop me eating healthily, he is just very much of the mindset of why deny yourself something you really want (ie in my case biscuits or cake) and would often say "you know you really want it" hence the encouragement as he knows I really want the brownie.

He only really controls what I eat at tea and thats only because he cooks it and serves it up. He also does the shopping, I just go along as I can drive and he can't. He doesnt force me to eat anything or stops me eating anything he just 's at me if I mention I want to eat healthier. Someone asked if it was because I never stick to "diets" so he thinks here she goes again. If I said I didn't want a particular meal then I would have to think of an alternative and would have to be something that he would want to make (if it were down to me it would be beans on toast) and I have no imagination and am rubbish at suggetions so I leave the meal planning to him.