Anyone want to join a thread about Eating Less.

[bumblingbovine]

I read this book by Gillian Riley a while ago and it made so much sense. She has a website here
www.eatingless.com

I may even go to a seminar but I think the book has most of whast you need in it. There is a chapter free on the website to get an idea of the tone

She talks about stopping overeating and says that focussing on weight is completely counterproductive. I really would like to try this but thought it would be useful to have some support.

I have been thinking about this for a while but issues with my ds have got in the way. The other thread on fat/overeating has reminded me

I will need to dig the book out agin but the key thing she talks about is setting some realistic limits on the what, the amount and when you will eat and then sticking to them.

The idea is to "stop overeating" not to "lose weight". In fact you can stop overeating much more easily than you can lose weight and it happens quicker.

So my food plan would be to

Eat 3 balanced meals a day (one portion only - no seconds)every day. This would be
Breakfast between 7am and 9am
Lunch between 12pm and 2pm
Dinner between 6pm and 8pm

To have a maximum of 1 snack a day which should be of a reasonable size and reasonably healthy

Dessert if eaten should be fruit or yoghurt during the week but can be something less healthy at the weekend for dessert if I want it

Success would be sticking to the food plan each day. Weight would not come into it.
everybody's foodplan would be different to suit them

We could check in every few days (or daily) with how we have done or if we are having trouble with cravings and wanting to eat more.

Does anyone want to try this?

winedog well done, that is excellent, very empowering. To know that the ability to change lies within ourselves.

Well, good day for me. I avoided cake - and there was a lot on offer - and just had a really nice main course dinner and some chocolate. I did manage to resist the temptation to eat it all and it is still in the fridge. Off for a dog walk tonight to get some exercise in.

Yes, winedog it is weird when you realise a description explains how you feel. It is liberating!

Best wishes to all.

Hi all

Last night I watched www.channel4.com/programmes/supersize-vs-superskinny/4od#3186716 (it has a sad bit about a lady whose baby died at 5 months gestation).

That link to Supersize Vs Superskinny, has two programmes. I have watched them both but the one I was thinking of was shown originally on 8PM Tuesday 10 May 2011 Channel 4 and says "Sugar junkie Danni Brooke swaps with 21-year-old Vicki Smith from Glasgow. Episode 7 Danni vs Vicki" If you are interested you have 6 days left to watch it from today.

What was interesting is that Danni meets Angel, an American lady who is very, very overweight. What is interesting is that Angel says something like 'The deliciousness of the food and the taste is not worth all this...(being so fat)" or words to that effect. It's funny because it reminded me of a saying that was doing the rounds about 10 or 20 years ago - Nothing tastes as good as thin feels!

It doesn't really make sense when you are fat because you can't remember what thin feels like! Well, that was my experience. If interested this website has some thoughts BUT I have not read it all - only the initial post. I am not saying I agree with it all, or the following comments from others, which I did not read! But it does pose a thought about feelings. As I have come to the conclusion feelings are at the front of this food problem business. So actually feeling fat or thin is not necessarily a good gauge! www.starling-fitness.com/archives/2005/03/15/nothing-tastes-as-good-as-being-thin-feels/

ANYWAY, BUT back to Supersize verses Superskinny (above) where Angel says something like 'The deliciousness of the food and the taste is not worth all this...(being so fat)"

NOW that does make sense (to me). It is not worth ruining your life for food. True she was about 40 stone and I am not, but even if you are a few stones over weight it may well already be impacting your health!

I am about 3-5 stone over my optimal weight, let?s say 4 for the sake of ease! (That is working on BMI which gives my weight to height about two stone ratio - 8 something to 10 something - pretty wide potential!) Anyway, although it is good to focus on the positive, I would like to be slim, have more breath, energy, umph etc - I also think it is wise to take on board warnings from other!

So I know that too much food ends up making you ill, really ill. That is why I do watch this type of programme, Supersize vs Superskinny, it is a kind of warning. I hope I would never get to 40 stone but then I guess the lady in that programme thought that too!

All the best with the ongoing healthy eating.

Hi everyone,
Really struggling today. The Bullying case at work took a bit of a blow today, with one of my main supporters deciding to withdraw (obviously out of self preservation) and I've been left feeling abandoned and betrayed, and racked with self-doubt.
On top of that I'm tired after a heavy week and DH is due on a night out tonight so I'm going to be alone too.
Images of ice-cream, chocolate and all kinds of unhealthy foods keep flashing through my mind, and I know it's my addictive brain trying to trick me into comforting myself. (that's the Angry, Lonely and Tired of 'HALT' already).
I know that the only option is to sit through this hurt and discomfort without giving in to things that will ultimately only damage my self esteem further, but it's sooooooo hard.
I can't even console myself with a long bath and an early night as DD has a friend over on a sleepover and you know how those things pan out. None of my friends are free to come over either.
I really want to get out of this self-pity pit in the healthiest way possible.
But my mind is working overtime and no distraction seems to be working.
Any words of support greatly appreciated.

IvaNighSpare owh, honey, that is so crap. OK, here's what you do:

Get creative! Journal your experiences, maybe one day they will be a book and make you rich! Maybe not but will be cathartic and get those feelings out. MAKE something really nice and healthy to eat fish and salad, granary bread, veggie option without masses of cheese, whatever you like. Get something nice nut nurturing for dessert like a mango/papaya/whatever your local co op has on offer.... and sit with those feelings but without feeling too bad about it all. Talk to yourself in a nice way. You were bullied, you are the victim BUT you don't need to have a victim mentality! Get a great movie out to watch when kids are in bed and have lots of fun with them (maybe making something fun like masks or whatever (if they are young) or if they are older and can amuse themselves stick a good uplifting DVD on (As good as it gets is very uplifting but sad in places) and think tomorrow will come and you can have that bath and the other kid will go home and the tribunal will be over and you can have ice cream again but maybe not today because today you would not really enjoy it, maybe not even taste it, because today you need to find another way to deal with all these feelings.

Take a look at DC, give him/her a hug and think, I'm lucky to have this great kid (so many do not), sit on your sofa under your roof and think I've got shelter, I'm safe, I?m not living under Gardaffi/war torn country etc.

Then get on Mumsnet and give us a holler!

Hugs and it won?t be too bad!

thank you

IvaNighSpare how has it gone/is it going?

My day has not been good - food-wise. I need to get back to my New ID group on Sunday to get me back on track!

Italian I made it through the night without doing anything I'd regret, your kind words made a big difference.
Today's a new day, I've got plenty to be grateful for and lots to look forward to.
Sorry you're struggling, but at least you're recognising earlier on that you need to address issues - you're obviously getting out of that "hole in the sidewalk" quicker now.
Do you have someone from your group you can chat to in-between sessions?

Don't you just wish we could talk to ourselves as sympathetically and kindly as we can obviously do to others?

oh, and my supporter in the case had a re-think and is not withdrawing their support after all. I received an apologetic phone-call last night. Phew!

IvaNighSpare yes, my friend, a very good friend, is doing the course with me. We do chat about it in between and it is helpful.

I am so glad you made it through the night and very glad too that your supporter is not withdrawing their support. I would hope as you are all adults that the bullying can be addressed in a helpful way. When kids bully they don't quite know what they are doing (I mean little kids) and yet as adults I would so much hope that people would be able to reason and use logic and see when things are hurtful. If you want to talk about it, feel free to share or to PM me but if not no worries. We are here to support you.

How old is DC, did you do any craft with them or are they like 15!

All the best.

Hi Iva and Italian
I'm so sorry I didn't get on the thread last night - just wanted to send good wishes to you Iva - sorry things are tough at present. Whenever I am under the cosh it is food I turn to so I really do sympathise. Glad to hear you still have your supporter on board and well done for coping so well the other evening.
Yes we wouldn't dream of talking to friends or family the way we talk to ourselves, would we?
Italian - wish you were my friend in RL- your lovely post to Iva was so sensible and kind, I found it heartwarming.
I've posted just now about my progress on the other Eating Less thread (we could really do with amalgamating them, I think).
I'm using the book and CD now and trying, above all, to be mindful of what I eat and drink. Doesn't always work but I feel I have made some progress.
Look forward to your updates and hope you're having a good weekend
STG

SteelTownGirl what a lovely kind thing to say!

Well this weekend has been OK food-wise, trouble is it is so entrenched after 20 plus years of overeating! I really do need to know what a normal portion is!

This site helps

www.foodnetwork.com/healthy-eating/10-ways-to-measure-perfect-portion-sizes/pictures/index.html

Bumbling Bovine welcome back! You must be back from your holiday today or tomorrow. I do hope all went well.

IvaNighSpare how is it going?

Steeltowngirl I just posted on the other thread where you helpfully linked to the sample chapter

www.eatingless.com/downloads/eatingless-free-sample.pdf

I said I like this one, "MYTH: Avoid temptations and keep yourself busy to stop thinking about food.

• As you may already know, this strategy will only take you so far. As with any problem in life, evading it doesn?t resolve it in the long term."

I think that is so true, you can't avoid food problems forever. Steeltowngirl Have you found is an answer to this? Has Gillian? (Or are you still looking?)

I am off to New ID www.newid.info/ again tonight and I really do need some support. It has been a very, very mixed week of triumph and also if let down! But on the whole if I can learn from it then not so bad!

Best wishes to all.

Oh, just to say when you click on the free sample chapter it does actually download it, it is not just a web page that you can view. Just to be aware of that.

Hi all

How is everyone?

It?s gone a bit quiet, does that mean you are all dong brilliantly and don?t need to post or all doing badly and don?t want to? Or neither, or both!

I've watched most of this Embarrassing Bodies programme ? tonight, on Channel 4.

www.channel4.com/programmes/embarrassing-fat-bodies/4od#3197136

It was very interesting and a bit distressing too, rather horrible scenes of surgery and stomach op that my husband could not watch!

I must admit I do find watching these programmes inspirational. So for me the good news is that I was just about to demolish my third cake when I sat down and watched the programme and now I am not at all interested in a having a cake! I am not eating anything more tonight unless I am hungry - I will have an apple if hungry!

Hi Italian and everyone else on the thread
I'm doing okay I think - been quite mindful over the weekend as regards what I eat but find it harder than in the week because my DH and DS are around all the time and so is food.
I'm still reading the book and find a lot of it quite repetitive.
I have a free-ish day tomorrow so thought I'd listen to the CD all the way through.
When about to grab something to eat, outside of formal mealtimes, I am trying to train myself to stop for a moment or two, and ask myself if I really am hungry for that item. Sometimes I can walk away, other times I eat the item but try to keep in mind the "consequences".
I find GR's idea of setting "Times" when to eat quite helpful (I can stick to those) but her "Plans" less so - it's not always easy or practical to plan exactly what you are going to eat e.g. I went to a funeral today with a buffet afterwards - no prior knowledge of what would be on the table.
And although it's not in GR's "system" I find distracting myself, particularly by getting out of the house is a great help.
My household centres on a big homely kitchen where we all spend a lot of time - and food is always close at hand.
Look forward to hearing how you are all doing
STG
xx

Hi- can I ask, is the CD useful? I've read the book through once and must re-read it (I will skip the bits I now know to be her basically repeating what's common sense!).

I feel like I'm doing OK. My main problem is I'm eating the same food over and over again, fearful of over doing it. I have the same breakfast, lunch is a variation on a narrow, soup based theme, and dinner is meat (chicken or even a sausage), big salad and a couple of baby potatoes. Must branch out into more variety or I will get bored! Admittedly, last night was chilli con carne (yum) which I felt, at the time, I was eating a slightly bigger serve than I should be, but thankfully my motivation wasn't destroyed when I got on the scales this morning. I have decided to weigh in twice a week til I reach 12 stone, then weekly for a bit- til I feel I am in control of what I'm eating AND I am getting ready 'bodily indicators' that I am losing weight.

What I mean by that is belt notches, looser feeling clothes. I can see that my tummy is smaller, and that the waistband of my undies don't readily roll down under the bulge any more (sorry, hope you weren't eating at that point!); but I am aware that, as others have said, it can take at least a stone if not more for weight loss to become apparent to even oneself (Being very GR, I don't care what other think. I don't. Really... )

So, today I am 12 st 1lb, down from 13 stone 5 weeks ago. I am hoping my control sees me at 12 stone this Friday (second weigh in) though I appreciate that 1lb losses can be hard to measure. My 'treat' is to buy some new bras! Mine are nasty.

Hello everyone!
Hope everything is going well for all of you.
erebus I'm guilty, too, of getting into a rut of repetitive eating. I kind of get into an "if it ain't broke, don't fix it" mode, eating the foods I know help with the weight loss. I don't reckon that's a healthy attitude, it's almost as if I'm afraid of other foods and stick to the tried and tested. And inevitably I get bored and rebel. Not good. Must try and 'branch out' and control quantity and quality.
Things at work have let up a bit (bully seems to be getting the message) but things are a bit hectic. My problem at the mo is not eating enough - forgetting to eat and then overdoing it because I'm starving. Maybe that't where I need to apply the Plans.
Anyway, it's still great to be part of a very positive and healing thread, keep up the good work, folks.

Just watched the 'embarrassing bodies' (linked above). Blimey. I have to take my hat off to the bravery of those people who were prepared to bare all.

A funny thing, though: I have no idea what I look like. There were 2 women shown on there whom I identified with, sizewise, but one was 16 stone, the other 19. I am about 12 stone. I am absolutely not gloating, more interested in what I guess is a bit of body dysmorphea on my part!

Needs some more pondering!

Hello All

My day's not panned out as planned although I have fitted in a good 30 minute walk round a lovely lake near me. Being out in the sun makes me feel more positive about myself anyway.

So I am now going to listen to the CD all the way through and report back.
For the record, I've been following the GR guidelines as best I can for a week and seem to have lost a pound. Slightly disappointed, thought it might be 2/3 but okay about it. As you say erebus often weight loss manifests itself in more comfy clothes and that is my experience - had to put a belt on some jeans today.

So will keep on keeping on - hope you're all having a good day!

erebus Is your control a person? As in "I am hoping my control sees me at 12 stone this Friday"

I am sorry that you are finding the food boring and repetative. That is what happened with me when I first did Weight Watchers. It was my own fault, I got to know the 'points' in certain food and then stuck to it!

It's up to you erebus but you do need to eat a rainbow of food and have plenty of different fruit and veg, grains, protein etc. So please don't box yourself into a corner too much by eating the same food. Congratulations on the weight loss and enjoy your new bras! By the way I am the opposite, I think I look thinner than I do. I am just over 13 stone.

IvaNighSpare glad things are better at work. Don't get too hungry. Chose foods that will nourish you. Things that will make your body feel good. All the best.

SteelTownGirl I thought the GR way was not to weigh yourself! You may have lost some but also getting more toned. Keep going, be positive. All the best.

Where is bumblingbovine - back from hols yet!

erebus what I meant about the repative food was that it was a bad thing! You need to eat a lot of different foods, healthy foods I mean.

*stealtowngirl" GW's sample chapter says "When you weigh yourself over and over again you are using your weight to see whether you are succeeding or failing." I agree with that so weighing yourself over and over may not really help! however, imn the introduction to her book (that I downloaded as a free sample) it also says "MYTH: Overeating is the result of unresolved emotional issues. Yet many people overeat when they?re happy and enjoying themselves. It can be liberating to discover a way to overcome overeating without delving into your past." I agree that overeating is not always about emtional issues but for some peole it might be. Also, the problems in the past migh thave set up the bad eating habits which carry on even when you are happy. Any thoughts? I don't mean for you specifically - I mean in general.

Watched this tonight, really good, very encouraging!

www.channel4.com/programmes/jamies-food-revolution-hits-hollywood/4od#3194530

Shown tonight 10PM Tuesday 07 Jun 2011 Channel 4 - it says "Jamie's been banned from school kitchens across LA, so instead he's working as a cookery teacher at West Adams High School - the only school that would let him film." BUT the really fab bitfor me was watching him teach a single dad how to cook.

Greyhound, no by 'control' I mean 'self control'. I couldn't let anyone else be 'in control' of my weight and therefore health! Few people even know I'm watching my diet right now!

And you're completely right in that I have to be brave and branch out a bit in what I eat. The problem I have is not forward planning (though there IS a bit of trying to avoid making food all I think about! I want food and eating to fill only the part of my life it has to, not all my waking hours!)- so when it comes to needing to eat, I tend to reach for what I know is 'safe' in terms of intake!

As for me, I don't overeat due to unresolved emotional issues, I graze mindlessly. And interestingly I don't have a particularly poor body image despite thinking that I looked like the 16-19 stone women on the Fat programme!

erebus glad to hear no one else is in control, sorry I misread that sentence!

Glad you are going to branch out a bit.

Maybe not the kind of branching out I did today (Cadbury's Carmel!!)

Hi everyone
I know I am not supposed to weigh myself but I did need to establish a bit of a starting point in my head. I will stay away from the scales now and gauge my progress by the comfort or otherwise of my waistband.
Confession - I did listen to the CD yesterday and dozed off during it! GR has a gentle therapeutic voice. I wondered if I was taking in the messages subliminally?
I'm going to listen again tonight and tomorrw and will make some notes as I do so.
I'm not convinced it was money well spent but I'm busy and out and about a lot and thought I could listen to it in chunks while driving - not falling asleep of course!
Italian, hi you make a lot of good points. I went walking last night with a friend - she said she has put weight on lately simply because she is so happy! With me, I think it's a combination of things - true, I did have serious issues when I was younger - low self-esteem, maybe not enough praise, acceptance and validation from parents/peers - my bulimic episodes began when I was dumped by someone I was very much in love with. I'm really trying - not just as regards eating - to kind of move on from blaming the past for the present. I know it has influenced how and what I am today but I really am trying to take responsibility for the way I am - and that's probably why the Eating Less approach is good but it puts me in charge.
Last night I made a very creamy fruit fool for DH, DS and me - to use up fruit and cream from the fridge. I accepted that I really did want to eat a portion and did so.
Today however whilst out shopping I asked myself did I want biscuits with my tea and happily said no.
I'm feeling I've got an approach now that just might work - taking it a day at a time and trying to be kind to myself.
I'll try to provide a summary of the CD very shortly.
Warm wishes to you all - I'm finding the thread a great support.