@Belladog1 and @purplepie1 both refer to incredulity or impossibility and I can definitely identify with both of those. I seem to be in a period of uncertainty, confusion and anxiety at the moment, illustrated as follows
The size 16 White Stuff jeans I’ve been wearing last week are definitely loose, almost to the point I could slip them over my hips without undoing them. Emboldened, I did the trouser try-on previously mentioned, including size 14 So denim jeans - which Google tells me are cut to standard sizes whereas White Stuff are cut bigger. The 14’s almost almost fit. So when I put on a pair of M&S 16’s this morning I expected them to be loose, and was toying with the idea of trying on some 14’s in M&S tomorrow. But they are not loose…. they’re not tight, but they’re not loose. They fit perfectly, actually. I’ve lost over a stone, and a pair of jeans I was wearing before this summer fit me perfectly, which makes no sense.
Last night lying in bed, I felt really, uncomfortably full, like I’d overdone it. So I was convinced that this morning I would be up several pounds. Instead of which, I saw the lowest number I’ve seen to date, a smidge under 12 1/2 stone. Very confusing. Although maybe it means that the 2nd 4mg dose yesterday morning had increased my suppression, but I hadn’t been paying attention and ate through it.
And thirdly, I realise that on the trend weight scale I am within a stone and a half of being a healthy weight. And in this morning’s raw scale weight, I am within a stone and a half of my goal, and not much more than a stone away from the top of healthy weight. Give it another week or two, I could be within a stone….. this is exciting, but scary! Can it be real? Keep going, I could be there by Christmas, or early next year. What then? What happens next? What if I carry on losing weight, will I be able to stop myself? Will I get too skinny?
And, despite all this clear progress and the steadily reducing distance between me and my goals, I still look in the mirror and see, one minute, someone who looks perfectly normal, even slim sometimes int the right light…… and the next minute, I see flab and bulges and rolls of flesh.
I’m not expecting anyone to answer this or psychoanalyse me. Just getting it out there, really. The body’s changing, the brain isn’t quite keeping up. And the body is illogical!