@DidILeaveTheGasOn first of all, stop. Breathe. You don't have to be 100% on all of the time. Think about everything you've been dealing with since you started. You have had so many stressful things to deal with, and have come through them well. You've been poorly, and your body probably wants more energy to fight the infections. Sometimes the diet has to take a backseat while you deal with the other stuff first. Give yourself permission to be human, and to take care of yourself as you would the people you love - and that would not be forcing them to diet if what they need is nourishment, from both food and kindness!
That said, perhaps you do need to up the dose. I did that this week, as was feeling it was all pretty hopeless having stayed about the same weight through August, and even starting to slowly regain a bit through September, but was so afraid to up my dose as last time I'd tried to, the SEs came back and even though they weren't as severe as they had been in my 1st 2 weeks, it scared me and made me drop back again. This week, I've forced myself to do it, and no additional SEs, and my mood and mojo seem to be improving again.
Don't give up on yourself. Accept this for what it is, a small patch where things are a bit tricky and that will pass. If you need another week or two of being 'off diet' while you get your head in the game, give yourself permission to do that, but keep taking your MJ. Future you'll kick yourself so hard if you give up.
We're all going to have crappy patches, where we want to quit, and think we don't deserve to be healthy and happy in our skin. It's why we're all here, so someone can talk us down from doing something stupid!!
Sending you big, supportive hugs, and giving you permission to be as kind and supportive to yourself as you would be (and have been) to all of us. You're worth it xxx