Everyone just hates fat people

[mamabeeboo]

Yes I'm fat and yes I'm taking the WLI.

I've had it out with a friend of a friend during a catch up dinner yesterday and I'm fuming.

I've lost some weight and still have a good 5 or so stone more to go before I'm anywhere near the 'normal' BMI category. So no, I'm not wasting away or disappearing, or losing weight too fast.

The mistake I made was being honest about the jabs. But I stand by it, I think it's important to get healthy, regardless of how you do it, just get there.

ANYWAY, this person has suddenly decided to feel concerned for my health, now that the loss has become noticeable. With some silent nods from others about how you should 'just eat less and move more'. No shit is that what was supposed to do?!

A big discussion about:
just have willpower
just have smaller portions
do it the normal way, you don't know what you're putting into your body
it's not healthy
just put down the fork
it's about dicipline
it's not really losing weight though, is it (huhh??)
it's more rewarding to do it the normal way so you can feel achievement

It's gotten me thinking of how so many people just hate fat people. You want us to pay for being fat, to suffer at the gym doing workouts we don't like or can't do with joint pain and back pain etc. You want us to 'just have willpower' like it's that easy. You want us to try all the diets and fail so you can feel superior with your 'discipline' and that you 'look after your body'.

You hate the fact that these WLI have levelled the playing field.

I said all this yesterday and it became very frosty. These aren't my friends, I was there for the birthday girl, but I won't sit there and take it.

I'm posting because I'd love to hear what you might have heard when talking about WLI. (Or if anyone agrees with the above 🤔)

What do you mean by affect you instantly? It's not going to kick in automatically at 8am on the morning someone reaches 30 BMI, obviously. But actually, an obese person who's considering WLIs could indeed develop any of a number of obesity related conditions now. Someone's going to have a heart attack due to their weight related high cholesterol this week, for example. You admitted yourself that a death from obesity can take decades to manifest. Some obese people are already well into or nearly at the end of that particular path.

Also, statistically an obese person losing weight through diet and exercise is liable to regain it. That's a risk.

The premises of your argument are bad ones. There is no risk free option for a person who is already obese, and people take risks accepting medication for non life threatening conditions all the time. It is a comparison that fails on all points.

I agree @MerlinsBeard1. There were hardly and obese people in the 60s and 70s, despite plenty of fat and sugar in the diet.

I don’t think that people hate fat people, or really care whether or not they are taking the jab. However, what is irritating is the way that fat people these days are always trying to medicalise their obesity as a way of avoiding personal responsibility and accountability. Obesity isn’t a disease that just happens to you, it’s something that you do to yourself. Of course some people may find it harder to lose weight than others for a variety of reasons, but the same principles still apply. You are eating more calories than your body needs. The vast majority of people over 30 have to put effort into maintaining their weight and it’s pretty tiresome to hear obese people constantly playing the victim.

Some people may have emotional issues which cause them to eat more, but these are a minority, and surely it’s better to seek therapy and focus on treating the root cause of the problem than spend a lifetime on expensive and potentially damaging weight loss drugs.

"There were hardly and obese people in the 60s and 70s, despite plenty of fat and sugar in the diet."

@MidnightMeltdown So what do you think has happened to drastically alter people's willpower, personal responsibility and accountability since then? It must be something pretty serious to mean that so many people are now unwilling to control their diet in the way that you describe? What is the change that's happened?

Also, I'd like to explore the idea that me losing over 8 stone whilst using Mounjaro to achieve that is me not showing any personal responsibility and accountability for my weight? I was morbidly obese, now I'm not. I'm very nearly not obese at all, should be another month for that. Then I'll be homing in on a healthy weight. But this is irresponsible of me and me avoiding accountability?

Important to spell out that nobody is saying humans can never lose weight through diet. Rather, that when an obese human does this, it's liable to go back on again, and this is a risk in itself that needs to be factored in by those of you who want to talk about diet and exercise.

Note that discussion about willpower or what other people do clearly hasn't changed the way human bodies work so far, so if you think it's going to in the future, you'll need to tell us why.

And if therapy is the answer for some, one wonders what people are supposed to do whilst they wait for the teetering NHS to get round to providing it? Unless of course we're talking about going private, in which case it would be a double standard to talk about only the costs of WLI.

@MerlinsBeard1 will you change your view if future research shows that the health benefits of WLI far outweigh the risks for all obese people?

And to the OP, I’m sorry people have treated you this way. You don’t deserve what is a depressingly common response.

You’re taking responsibility for a very visible health issue, whilst so many people make just as many bad choices that just aren’t as easily identified by other people.

Dont let it derail you, you’re a winner in my eyes.

And this thread is the reason why I’d never talk to anyone about me using the jab.

Ill bask in the nice feeling if being congratulated for my weight loss, wo feeling judged instead.

It’s really demoralising reading all this negativity, I’ve struggled with my weight from the age of about 4, been bullied, made to feel worthless and ugly, humiliated and generally made to feel like a second class citizen, I’ve lost and gained so much weight from about the age of sixteen, so for the last 41 years I have been in a never ending circle of restricting calories, self loathing and misery.
Then I’m given a glimmer of hope, but still people try to make you feel worthless. I’m almost 5 stone down since starting Mounjaro and am regaining the life that I deserve. Many (not all) of these comments are so judgmental and I totally agree with @BlueTitShark, this is the reason why I’ll never bring this up in a conversation.

So pleased to hear about your 5 stone loss. This drug is a wonderful thing.

Congratulations on your loss. That’s fantastic and I hope you see it.

Let’s fill the rest of this thread with positivity and stories of lives changed.

The best revenge is a life well lived after all!

Why exactly do people think losing weight has to be done the hard way? To me it’s just rooted in a self righteous attitude of ‘well you did it to yourself, so you’re going to have to have a terrible time while undoing it’. People just need to mind their own business!

I’ve been very selective about who I’ve told - just my OH, dad and three closest friends all of whom said, ‘great, let us know if you want to talk about it!’ I said no, I didn’t want to but I’d let them know if I did. Best kinds of friends!

To me, this friend sounds like she’s a bit jealous. Can’t have you getting too thin and happy now, can we? Keep going OP!

Im more disturbed by strangers who are rubbing their hands in glee in anticipation for when it all goes tits up with mounjaro in time. I mean, what ‘normal person’ thinks like that? I guess what this thread has highlighted is people are crazy and it’s one of the reasons, I’m antisocial. And for everyone on it including myself as said above, let’s carry on living our best lives.

I’ve lost 5 stone on it and it’s changed my life. I feel better than I have since my early 20s (I am now 39), probably even better than I even did then as my diet now is exceptional and I’m doing proper exercise. I look fantastic too. Worth every penny and more.

Oh and I don’t care what anyone thinks of it, it’s nothing to do with them

I've asked on a few threads like this now why losing weight needs to be done the hardest way possible and am yet to receive any answers! I guess it's because if you had to try to explain why you think that, it would likely sound pretty unhinged.

And no one says that people who use nicotine patches are “cheating” or should just smoke less.

We can’t just stop eating, like you can stop smoking, we have to have the thing we want more of but in moderation.

No wonder it’s so flipping hard.

telling people struggling with obesity to just eat less is like putting a gambling addict in the middle of the casino and asking them to play moderately.

@threeeggsontoast because fat people should be shamed and punished at every opportunity including when they lose weight, to atone for being fat to start with. That’s all it is.

And the self hatred from people who were once fat is as obtuse as the the hate from the thin. The glory in suffering and starving to be thin is bizarre. ‘I have to suffer so should you’.

I am delighted for everyone loosing weight on jabs. As someone with PCOS, type 2 diabetes and a never ending food noise soundtrack, I am overjoyed that there is an option for me should I need it in the future too.

Fuck the begrudgers, the naysayers and the ‘concerned for health’ lobby.

It seems to me that some posters would prefer if people remained fat and miserable .
One should not underestimate how thoroughly soul destroying it is to be fat.
Everything you do is ‘governed’ by your weight.
Going out for a night out, going on a funfair ride, plane seats , health issues , applying for jobs etc
All the mental energy expended on thinking about one’s weight
I encouraged my mother to get Mounjaro. She has spent most of my life on different diets. Mounjaro has given her a new lease of life .
I couldn’t give a flying fuck whether people think she is ‘cheating ‘. She is healthy , looks beautiful and has extended her life expectancy .
The naysayers can make as much noise as they want, people are still going to take Mounjaro and get slim whether they ( the naysayers) like it or not.

I think it’s well established by now that there’s a certain group who get their sense of self worth by bringing thinner than others. That means their sense of self worth relies on others being fat.

Its actually quite interesting. It shows how much we have internalised Christian values. Those saying “ just eat less run about more” are effectively evoking some of the morality around the seven deadly sins by saying your punishment for sloth and gluttony is being fat, look at me I’m slim and therefore not sinful. I find that quite fascinating, even though there’s so much research now saying the causes of obesity are multifaceted, in this secular age people who want to claim superiority are ignoring the science and clinging onto religious beliefs, even if they’re not aware.

I'd also add that this belief is sometimes seen in obese people. Which I think is more interesting than thin people, since as you say those who are winning in the current social system obviously have more to lose.

It’s definitely a very divided society that we live in. All the evidence points to the many many health benefits of this drug yet there are still some who like to cling to the “oh it’s bad for you, you don’t know what you’re taking” line. Yes we do know what we’re taking and we feel great on it and love it. I’m 54 and haven’t felt this great and healthy in years. When I started losing weight the other ladies in work used to compliment me and say well done etc. As I approached my goal weight I decided to come clean and told them I’m on weight loss injections. Since then radio silence even when I bring up weight loss. I get the impression that they think I don’t deserve praise for losing weight because I used injections. Not that I need their praise but I just find it telling as to how they feel about it. I should add these other ladies are quite slim. People can be assholes

It really does affect every minute of someones life, down to just walking a few metres and in that few seconds have: had to adjust clothing because it’s ridden up, felt out of breath, hated myself. It controlled and limited everything.
when you’re slim you just don’t have to think about any of it
I don’t take them but I’m only happy for people who do. If it means my friends start feeling confident and saying yes to more socialising then great! If it means my family members are around longer, fantastic. There are no negatives