Wedding ruined please help

[Londonlamb]

I’m writing this in the hotel room after marrying the love of my life because my dad ruined it
I don’t have much family so from my side the invites were him and 2 cousins I asked him to walk me down the aisle and it was all well planned out
he turned up before the service but brought his new girlfriend and 3 children I’d never met any of them before and the times he has spoken about them was negative
I felt really uncomfortable during the vows knowing strangers were at my wedding and the eldest child who’s a teenager was making lots of noise
we spent 2 years saving and preparing for this day and every tiny detail was organised so it’s been turned upside down by strangers in crap outfits coming along
We have an hour before the party and meal starts and the seating has been organised for the invited guests only so there’s no food or place for them
i want to tell my dad to leave and take them with him but I’m scared to push him away
my make up is ruined and the lady who done it left ages ago no one had checked on how I am my husband is talking to my cousins who are angry too what to do to salvage the day? I can’t believe I have let this over shadow my day but I’m angry and upset they are here
I have no friends so there’s no one here to support me I’m still trying to work out how to pee by myself with this dress on I just wish I could start the day again properly but it’s nearly over and I didn’t enjoy it we haven’t even got a honeymoon because we can’t afford it
is there anyone who can give me a bit of support and advice please

They were rude to turn up uninvited, and your dad is as bad for allowing it.
Im so sorry this happened as you will never forget it.

OP, I'm a (very) old goth.
There is no kind of unreasonable dress I have not worked out to have a pee in, lovely. If it's a big skirt bring the back folds of it forward and tuck it down your dress before you sit down.
The only frock I did struggle with was a big hoop skirt that didn't fit in the cubicle but I went in sideways ....

Congratulations on your wedding @Londonlamb , and Mr Londonlamb.

These people have left. Enjoy your meal, your new inlaws and your wonderful new husband. Wishing both of you a long and happy life together.

However it's resolved don't let it ruin your day, get a big glass of something, let someone help you with make-up and dress and enjoy the day.
You won't agree today but in twenty years time you'll be laughing about it, it'll be one of those stories that get your children eye-rolling!

Firstly congratulations OP! I can see why you're upset but your wedding isn't ruined. You married your DH! Celebrate that! 🍾

I really hope things have got better- congratulations

I hope you see this but in response to not knowing how to pee in your dress, straddle the toilet facing the cistern, hopefully things get better

Oh you poor love… Your dad was a selfish, ignorant twat bringing uninvited guests to your wedding. I wish I was there to help you with your makeup and dress. I’m so pleased they’ve been asked to leave! (If it helps, the horrid teenagers were probably forced to come anyway. They would have been bored silly! Good!!!) Obviously your cousins are lovely and make up for your dad’s lack of manners. Enjoy your fizz and live Happily Ever After. Congratulations!!!

Btw, I used to be an opera singer. Have worn lots of ridiculous dresses. The advice above about facing the wrong way is 👍👍👍. Just be super careful when cleaning up, and turn the taps on slowly and gently.

Congratulations OP
Your dickhead father is just that and hopefully he has left by now

Your DH has supported you which is great.

Start afresh. You look fabulous.

Start your new life together with a great wedding.

Sounds like there is a huge back story which is not for today but I really hope you make some friends x

Your in laws will really feel for you and want to support you. People can see through this behaviour. Your dad is nasty for doing this but you have a guy in your life now who respects and loves you and will fight your corner - your DS. Focus on him, how fabulous you look and the incredible life you have in front of you as a couple!

Congratulations on marrying the love of your life. Your wedding is not ruined- unless you choose it to be. I'd be damned if I'd let some random woman and her kids spoil my special day.

Op you probably wont see this until tomorrow but congratulations on your big day! I'm sorry your dickhead dad and his chav entourage have upset you. My husbands family were similar on my wedding. They all looked like they was going to the pub, not a wedding. It still slightly irks me and we've been married 14 years in September! But I promise you, the ring on your finger, and the love of your life by your side will beat any negative feelings and thoughts you have about today. Wipe your tears, and hit the dancefloor. Spend tonight snuggled up next to your husband, your first of many. It's not just about today, it's about every day after. I know that's not great, especially since today is the day you have been planning for so long but at the end of the day, its about you, and your man and that's it. Everything else is surplus. I hope you have a magical evening, and can put the earlier shenanigans behind you xxx

Hope you're enjoying the rest of your day. Congratulations!

Congratulations @Londonlamb please don't forget to tell your new husband, "I love ewe".

I'll get my coat, it's a fleece.

Bless you, sweetheart, I sincerely hope that you and your new DH are enjoying your day now. If it wasn’t a misunderstanding on his part, shame on your DF for spoiling your ceremony, but many years down the line this could be one of those stories you dine out on. All best wishes for a long and happy marriage.

You're not responsible for your father's poor behaviour, let alone that of his hangers on, so don't be worrying about how it reflects on you.

Exactly. None of this is your fault, so don’t waste any more tears. Go on and enjoy the rest of your wedding 👰‍♀️

You are allowing then to spoil your day. You should have invited them all tbh and he probably assumed they were all invited.
So deep breath, make them wekxinr. Add then onto the arrangements. Venues are used to this. Don't worry. And smile and enjoy the rest of the day.

YOU are ruining this for yourself. Not them.

I hope it’s all resolved and you’re having a happier time. Focus on the fact that you’ve married the man of your dreams who has your back and was down there sorting it out for you. Don’t let your dad spoil it for you. He owes you an apology and don’t feel guilty if it pushes him away a bit. He’s caused it all, not you.. Congratulations.x

You should have invited them all tbh and he probably assumed they were all invited.

Why? She doesn’t know them from a bar of soap. And who the hell assumes someone is invited to a wedding - let alone four additional people?!

I'm so sad for you but please don't let your father and his uninvited guests, ruin the rest of your special day.
You need to ask him to leave as you haven't catered for his g/f and her children. Try to keep calm and don't let him upset you. It's not your problem to sort out.
I'm thinking of you and hoping this shaky start can be resolved by your husband and you both enjoy the rest of the evening.
Congratulations and wishing you the happiest marriage and a bright future. 🍾🥂🎉

Congrats OP, what a gorgeous day you have for your wedding!
You can't control what other people do, you can only control your reaction to it. So forget about them and go enjoy yourself with your new husband. I remember those newlywed days. Sigh. Enjoy x

I think it’s a bit more than that - four extra people turning up uninvited with no place setting or food catered for, and behaving badly from the OP’s post. At this point it’s irrelevant how long her dad has been with his girlfriend - she and her children weren’t invited and it’s beyond ignorant for him to have turned up with them on the day.

@Londonlamb Congratulations to you and your husband 🍾🥂 Hope you are having a lovely time now❤💐

Why should she have invited four extra people she has never met ? She isn’t ‘allowing’ anything. They shouldn’t be there and her dad knows it.